Stillness

So much rest & peace is represented in that one word: Stillness.

And yet, it seems near impossible to me on most days… & I don’t even have kids… or a full-time job.

This idea of stillness is often equated with restlessness & boredom to me.

I hate boredom. I eat to avoid boredom. I binge tv to avoid boredom. I waste away entire days on stuff that doesn’t really satisfy or fulfill me from a desperation to avoid boredom.

And yet, that’s not the evoked feeling that was intended when God spoke in Psalms, “Be still.”

Be Still & Know

The powerful Truth in that simple statement is one that is meant to refresh us & comfort us & to assure us that God has everything under control.

It’s a reminder that we’re not made to be able to do it all or handle it all.

It’s a reminder that we are made with limitations… but that He is NOT.

It’s a reminder that we were MADE to NEED HIM.

“Mary Has Chosen What Is Better, & It Will Not Be Taken Away from Her.”

This simple command to “Be still & know” reminds me of Jesus’ response to Martha, in Luke 10, when He visited Mary & Martha. Martha was upset at her sister Mary for not helping with hostess duties. But Jesus gently responded that Mary had made the better choice & that it will not be taken from her.

Mary’s choice? To sit at Jesus’ feet, soaking up His presence & spending time with Him, learning His words & enjoying time with Him.

I Fight Stillness

In that retelling of Mary & Martha with Jesus, I feel like I would be their unknown other sister Michelle (fits because we’re all ‘M’ names, right?), who wants to avoid the stress the duties bring, while also too restless & impatient to sit still & just be with God… wanting instead to time-fill as much as possible, avoiding everything.

Can you relate?

Being still with God is SO HARD for me. I will grab for my phone or the tv remote or game controller or iPad or music or food or text someone or call family or just crawl in bed & avoid it ALL… before I would EVER think to stop & JUST be still with God.

It’s not easy for me at all.

My Stubborn Self-Solutions

That’s why I am completely terrible at abusing a lack of intentional prayer time. Instead of putting aside all distractions to be still with God, I grab for the nearest distraction I can find because stillness makes me restless.

Oh yes, I pray throughout the day, talking to God in my heart over simple things or lifting up requests or praises to Him… AS I am going about my day.

But BEING STILL & just being content to SIT with God? To be STILL with God? NOPE.

I am learning that I can’t continue this way, grabbing for the nearest distractions to fill the empty space.

I NEED that rest. I NEED that reset. I was designed to NEED that stillness… because I was designed to NEED God.

My Desperate, Resistant Prayer

And to be honest, sometimes recognizing that need, in contrast with my strong distaste of restlessness, manifests itself as me having to slump to the floor in surrender to my fight & saying, “GOD, HELP ME! I KNOW I need You! I KNOW it! But I just CAN’T do it! I feel such an impossibly strong pull to fill up the empty space with devices & noise & distractions & it feels impossible to JUST sit. HELP ME. Please. I don’t want to keep giving up. I don’t WANT to be controlled by this addiction to distractions. I WANT to learn how to be still. I WANT to spend time with You. I WANT to be consistent in decompressing & letting You take all of my little nagging insecurities & inadequacies & areas I don’t know how to move forward. I want to stop compressing them & avoiding them & trying to soothe over them. I want to trust YOU with them. I want to recognize YOU ARE GOD. Please help me fight the “NEED” to fill time even if it means slumping to the floor & babbling through a prayer. I want to want You more. Help me stop avoiding stillness with You. Help me embrace it. Help me embrace You. AMEN.”

Letting Go & Letting GOD

I wrote this week’s blog post. I was almost done with it. But I felt the push to hit select all & delete. So, I did. Because I was flowering it more than my reality.

And I had to kneel on the floor at the couch & ask God to help me not just want to quit it all.

I am no wise person with all the answers who gets it right all the time. I am weak & rebellious & self-centered. I avoid my problems rather than turning to God with them. I avoid stillness with God because the stillness makes me uncomfortable.

I am a work in progress.

I Was Made for Stillness

I need Him & that’s okay because I was MADE to need Him.

And so were you.

I need to stop avoiding things that bring me discomfort & I need to stop trying to soothe over them with ignorance… I need to LEAN INTO God & ask Him to help me face what needs to be faced in each day… even if that means that I need to put everything down & on pause… & just sit & be still & know that He is GOD.

So, be praying with me… for me & for yourself… to be willing to BE STILL with God.

Shine HOPE by taking that time to BE STILL with Him & know that HE IS GOD.

Amen & Amen.

Coming Next Week

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As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

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A Note from Michelle:

This blog/website has been running for over TWO years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

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Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Grace Earrings

These earrings feature gold plated metal around local capiz shell.

Artisan Information:

In the Philippines, finding employment as a woman in poverty can be extremely difficult. Poor working conditions, lack of job security, & unfair pay are often the realities. Through your purchase, these women are receiving an income, health care, & social development programs. This allows these women to realize their potential & pursue their dreams in a safe environment. You have the opportunity to change lives!

Purchase this piece & empower a woman in the Philippines!

How You Can Help:

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

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