You Don’t Need to Feel Ashamed for Big Emotions

I was talking to a friend in the past months about her struggle through some very strong, painful emotions. Like many of us, she felt guilty for feeling that way, as if it made her seem to not be trusting God enough with it.

That’s how I grew up believing, too. That if I am having very strong negative emotions, it was shameful because it meant I wasn’t trusting God enough.

But let me tell you something that will hopefully loosen those chains for you a little bit if you also struggle with that type of shame—emotions are not sin… they’re simply indicators.

Emotions on Full Display Throughout the Bible

I would like to encourage you to, as you read through the Bible in the coming months, look out for expressions of emotions… how they’re expressed, what comes from them, prayers prayed through them, how God responds to them, etc. You will slowly release any idea of feeling ashamed for feeling.

Emotions are very clearly & strongly expressed throughout the entire Bible!

Now, just as having hundreds of wives & concubines, as many kings did (including kings whom God praised for their faith), just because it’s mentioned IN the Bible does not mean it is automatically not sinful.

And that is why we must look at how God RESPONDS to emotions in the Bible. This is why I strongly encourage you to turn your attention to that as you read in the coming months, so you can begin to see patterns emerge in looking at how God feels about our feelings.

Joy IN the Hurts/Distresses?

As someone who struggles with depression, sometimes pretty severely in certain seasons of my life, I can tell you right now how so many of the Psalms, as well as the “thorn in the side” passage (2 Corinthians 12:7-10) become so clear. This understanding that I can have such intensely painful feelings, not always even see any real, justifiable cause for them (which only makes it more painful & embarrassing), & still feel joy AND intense pain simultaneously. One does not always erase the other.

And that right there is what I think so many Christians misunderstand about having joy in every season, trusting the Lord… as if it means you should therefore not feel pain because you should feel joy.

No. Just as Paul says, “in needs… in distresses,” he doesn’t say the distress is therefore now ABSENT because he now sees the bigger picture of being a testimony for God’s strength in his weaknesses & pains… he says IN IT.

That was me, going through my very dark, very painful seasons. The sun didn’t come out & shine all my sad hurting away because I trusted God in it… the pain very much remained & tormented me, & yet I had this hope inside of me, this “come what may, I know You have a plan, God… I know You have me… I know You won’t waste a single ounce of this pain I feel right now.” A peace, A contentment. A knowing. An assurance. A HOPE.

A joy.

Don’t Suffer in Silence Trying to Look “Strong for God”

So often I see Christians who are very obviously suffering trying to plaster on a smile for all the world around them to see, afraid to be a bad witness for Christ, afraid it will appear that they must not trust Him “enough.” STOP!

The Bible does NOT shy away from pain. It is clear about it. It talks about it. And it shows that God is sovereign, sufficient, & sure through it. Compassionate, gentle, kind even.

Honey, if you are plastering “I’M OKAY” on your face to prove to others how good your God is… stop it.

All the world sees then is you pretending to be strong. It doesn’t show HIM to be strong.

Being a testimony to His strength means being real about your weaknesses. BOASTING even in them. So that others may clearly see that you don’t have all the answers, you’re not strong, you’re not able… but HE IS.

Big Emotions Don’t EQUAL Sin, But They Are Also No Excuse for Sin

Big emotions are not an excuse to wallow, to hide away, withdraw, hold bitterness, lash out, hurt others, be rude, talk about someone behind their back, refuse kindness to others who are undeserving such as yourself. Big emotions are not an okay to sin.

Big emotions are not sin, but they’re also not an excuse for sin.

They’re just indicators. So please stop beating yourself up over them. Stop beating OTHER people up for them. And check yourself if you’re using emotions as your “get out of jail free card” for wrong behavior or bad attitudes that displease & dishonor God. You need to yield them to God for help if you are struggling with this.

God Sees Me & God Cares

Sometimes, when I am flooded by big, hard emotions, whether someone said a careless hurtful thing, it’s that time of the month, something awful happens, or my depression is just kicking my butt… whenever I feel like whimpering, “Can I please just go to heaven now, God? I don’t want to feel this hurt anymore,” I picture God as so big & mighty that He fills a whole 2-story open room, & small little me (in comparison) crawls up into the crook of His elbow & curls up there, nestled in His strong arms. Safe. Protected. Loved.

I stop to remember that He is bigger than me. Stronger. Powerful. Wise. Good. Compassionate. Kind. Loving. He has a plan. He holds me. He hears my cries. He knows my heart. He loves me. He is sufficient in all things. I can trust Him even when everything is hard & everything hurts.

Even then… I can trust Him. And so can you.

How to Please God & Have Big Emotions

Stop trying to be “strong” for God. He is more than capable for the BOTH of you.

Shine HOPE by coming to God, crying out to Him in those big emotions, trusting He sees you, has you, & has a plan in it… turning to Him & crying out to Him as your help in & through it, & by shaking off the shame for those indicators that ought to just draw you right back into His very capable & loving arms. Having joy, even in still feeling very much the hurts of the storm you are in, because He’s got you.

Coming Next Week

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