I had my blog all typed up. Ready to copy/paste. Ready to edit.

But as I sat here, pasted text on my blog editor site… it just felt off. Like I couldn’t get myself to continue with it. Not in a defiant or lazy way, but like a brick wall was preventing me from continuing.

So, now I have 1.5 hours left before I publish & my page is erased & I am writing this instead.

God knows what I need more than I do. He knows what’s on my heart better than I do. He sees the depth of my subconscious & knows all of its triggers & intricacies better than I understand it myself.

I can trust Him with my deepest fears, deepest hurts, deepest longings, deepest failures, deepest insecurities… ugliest of ugly cries.

I don’t have to prove anything to Him. I don’t have to try to make Him like me or want to spend time with me. I don’t have to convince Him to love me.

He just does.

How often I try to pretty up my emotions or wrong thinking for Him, as if He doesn’t already know.

The psalmists inspire me with their rawness. I can be like that with God. He can handle it.

He doesn’t want my cliff notes. He wants all of me… the good, the bad, & the ugly.

How beautiful a truth that is to me.

I don’t have to ever pretend I’m better than I am. I don’t have to project strength or assurance.

I can be scared. I can be unsure. I can doubt. I can wonder. He is patient with it all. He can handle it all.

He is patient & kind. He is gentle. He is enduring in His love for me. Faithful when I flee. Forgiving when I trust His blessings over Him as my blessings-Giver.

I can show my imperfections & weaknesses. I can feel worthless & hopeless. He stands steady & sure. Unwavering. Ready to welcome me home no matter how far I stray.

What a wonderful Father indeed. He will listen for hours & not tune me out. He will take me at my worst & respond with gentle kindness. He is what I lack & supplies generously upon request.

He doesn’t hold back. He doesn’t guilt me or shame me or push me away.

He loves with an enduring, faithful love. A love laced with grace, grace, by definition being undeserved, above & beyond even. His mercies are new every morning. He forgives upon forgives upon forgives.

How faithful. How true. How sure. How steady. How eternal. How infinite He is.

I am always safe & always loved when I come to the arms of Jesus.

Those same arms are waiting to welcome you, too.

And that’s all I have to say today. Turn to Him. He’s what you need. Nothing else will satisfy like the unfailing love of the God Who made you… the steady unchangeable God, shown so beautifully, so completely, so dramatically through the sacrifice of His one & only Son, Jesus Christ our LORD.

I don’t know where you’re at. I can’t see you. I can’t know your thoughts or your fears or what you mask to show strength to the world because you feel the world needs to see you strong.

God doesn’t care about pretense. He doesn’t need a show. He loves you. Just you. Right now. Where you’re at. Whatever that looks like.

He won’t ever stop pursuing you. He won’t ever give up on you.

I know. I’ve seen it. 36 years (as a Christian) full of failures & shortcomings & lessons learned & humbling moments & He has never once left me. He pursues you. He never gives up on you. Even at your ugliest, very worst version of yourself. The part of you you’re ashamed of. He sees it. And He loves you.

He wants to heal those parts of you. He wants to break you free from their chains. He wants you to feel hope swell up in you & overflow across everything that resides in the deepest, darkest depths of your heart.

Every night, I thank God audibly for the same thing. Every night. “Thank You Lord, that You never give up on us.”

He will never give up on you. He is faithful even if you’re not.

He asked Jesus to die for every wrong bit of you, even down to the morning grumpies to the very worst of you. Jesus let them beat Him & torment Him & lie about Him & spit on Him & KILL HIM because HE LOVES YOU THAT MUCH. Nothing you can do can ever stop that love He has for you!

NOTHING.

Repent. Turn to Him. Trust on Him. Lay it all down at His feet & receive His forgiveness. Because He offers it free of charge. His love COMPELS Him to.

Run into the arms of Jesus. He’s waiting for you. And He always will be. And nothing you do can ever change that.

“Thank You, LORD, that You never give up on us.”