Michelle Hyde Online - Helping Women Find Hope & Shine Like They Were Always Meant To
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Michelle Hyde Online - Helping Women Find Hope & Shine Like They Were Always Meant To
Home
My Blog
About Me
Resources & Recommendations
Work With Michelle
Hope Is Found
Connect With Me
  • Home
  • My Blog
  • About Me
  • Resources & Recommendations
  • Work With Michelle
  • Hope Is Found
  • Connect With Me
Flushing Bad Habits, God-Centered Perspective Shifts, Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith, Relationships, Salvation & Grace

You Don’t Struggle Alone–Looking to God in Your Marriage

July 29, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments

Always the Romantic

I enjoy watching quippy romantic comedies & classic animated princess movies. I was always a sucker for a good love story & I couldn’t wait to have one of my own. I was always a romantic with my rosy glasses & dreams of the married life… dreams of feeling loved & accepted by a guy who was head over heels in love with me.

But something I fear has happened in a culture saturated with this genre of movies—we almost subconsciously believe that the “happily ever after” implies that once you find your “prince charming” & once you work through your struggles or whatever the specific trial is in the storyline of your relationship, all’s good from here on out as you enjoy forever wedded bliss.

And then sitcoms go & show marriage to be a joke almost, like misery is just an expectation, divorce is inevitable, & there is absolutely no way to feel satisfied & happy in marriage. And a sex life? Ha. Forget it, right?

So there becomes this conflict between expecting that once you work through your differences, everything should go perfectly, & that when it inevitably doesn’t, well, “that’s just marriage for ya.”

We Are Complex People

I talked on social media yesterday about how complex we are as people & how it’s often that we like to label people, even subconsciously as: “a nice guy/girl,” “a rude person,” “an angry person,” “an annoying person,” etc. because it just helps us in quickly determining whether we like or dislike, trust or distrust someone… a way we protect ourselves instinctively.

But I go through seasons where you’d probably feel like warning others about me: “she complains ALL THE TIME,” “she gave into temptation & dishonored God,” “she seems to be struggling all the time, she’s a mess,” “she overshares,” “she’s awkward.”

I have seasons where I am moody & selfish & just want to take care of me first. I have seasons where I doubt God’s way & choose my own. I have seasons where I feel all hope is lost. I have seasons where I trust in the blessings given to me by God more than the God Who gave me those blessings. I have seasons where I am giving & kind. I have seasons where I am courageous & confident.

I can’t be summed up by a simplistic generalization.

Humans Choose Wrongly Sometimes

I don’t stop being a flawed human with a sinful human nature that wars with my spirit when I accept Jesus’ payment for my sins on the cross. I don’t become perfect.

I still have to choose to submit to the work & leading of the Holy Spirit in my life.

Just like Job, as he questioned God in his deep pain & tragedy.

Just like Jonah as he ran away from God’s directions.

Just like Abraham, as he listened to his wife’s terrible plan to “help” God fulfill His promise to them for a child.

Just like David as he didn’t avert his gaze but gave into sexual temptation & then followed it through by having the woman’s husband killed to cover it up.

I am still human. I am saved from my sin, guaranteed to go to heaven… but I still require His DAILY grace & to DAILY submit to HIS leading, wisdom, & strength in my own humanness.

Well, guys… the same is true in marriage.

You Married Another Human… Of Course There Will be Struggles

If you feel frustrated with your spouse, you are far from alone in that, because you, my dear… married another human being.

Just like me, when I can be a grump. I can be selfish & self-centered. I can be a complainer. I can be tempted to throw in the towel & just give up. I can cry & struggle a lot sometimes & seem like a huge burden. I can struggle with anger & resentment. I can choose to sin by denying God’s promised way out.

I am a lot. And so are we all at times, if we’re willing to be honest with ourselves.

That is why we can understand how it is such an extremely undeserved blessing of what Jesus did on that cross for us, right?

That is why marriage is so hard in some seasons. Especially when we fixate on what frustrates us rather than pray/extend grace. (Grace, by definition, is undeserved.)

The Necessity of Building a Marriage upon GRACE

Giving grace is absolutely a necessity in marriage. But giving grace is also one of the hardest things in the world to extend to another person sometimes. Jesus gave His life to give us grace.

Habits may annoy you. Seeming lackadaisical about something that means so incredibly much to you can frustrate the snot out of you. Grumpy moods or bad attitudes, especially when you have a headache or are having a bad day yourself can make you want to throw down.

We see the worst of each other. We see the weaknesses, the failures, the bad habits, the lazy days, the lack. We see their humanity better than anyone else. Friction is imminent.

That is why it is so vital that we take all of those things, whenever they may arise, & bow them to Jesus… asking God to give you the perspective & strength & peace to extend grace… to bring healing to your heart where sometimes it feels impossible… & by refusing to feed your desire to fuel the fire you feel is so rightfully needing to be fueled in that moment. GRACE.

You Don’t Struggle Alone–Looking to God in Your Marriage

Don’t let Satan trick you into believing your marriage is beyond saving because of these things… that the annoying habits are just “too much,” or that you can’t get past them… or that either divorce or unhappiness is inevitable in every marriage… that “it will be different” in a new marriage….

But also, don’t let Satan trick you into believing that marriage does not require much grace all along the way. Much prayer & submission to God to be the glue & the bridge when rifts threaten to pull you apart for good.

God CAN where you can’t. God CAN do the impossible. Dare to try Him on that. Dare to trust Him more than you trust yourself.

Shine HOPE by giving your spouse grace upon grace & by always remembering to turn to God as your daily hope, wisdom, & strength to hold your marriage together strong & to continue growing your marriage into a better physical representation of God’s great & undying love & grace for us, through Jesus Christ.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement right here on my blog/website @ www.MichelleHydeOnline.com.

Share with friends & family… & SUBSCRIBE by “Joining My Tribe,” so you never miss a week!

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

A Note from Michelle:

(***Check out my FREE Journal Printable Resources: “Accountability Partner Guide + Question Prompts” & “Bible Study Question Prompts ,” as well as “Prayers of Surrender” prayer guides!***)

This blog/website has been running for SIX years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” tab. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” tab, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox (make sure to check your other inbox folders), along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Consider these pieces when shopping for friends, family, or yourself. Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Noa Marquise Set (INDIA)

Trades of Hope, Noa Marquise Set, India, You Don't Struggle Alone--Looking to God in Your Marriage
(Shown: Noa Marquise Set, handcrafted in India. Purchase this set to empower women in INDIA out of poverty!)

Bundle and Save – Available while supplies last! This beautiful necklace set includes the Noa Necklace and the Chery Marquise Necklace to create a stunning layered look. Each necklace is made by women earning a dignified income in India.

***Purchase the Noa Marquise Set to create safe jobs for women ending poverty cycles in India.***

How You Can Help the Artisans & Support My Website:

#1 is PRAY. Financial help is great & helps pay my website fees & helps support these women artisans… but God’s help is always needed most… both for encouragement & for spiritual hope, through Jesus, for the women we support through our ethical fashion purchases. Always PRAY first.

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me in continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win-win-win!

Love ya lots! Have a wonderful week!

Flushing Bad Habits, God in Our Suffering, God-Centered Perspective Shifts, Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith

My “Anti-Word” for 2024–“VICTIM”

July 22, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments
My "Anti-Word" for 2024--"VICTIM"

My “Anti-Word” for 2024

One word that keeps popping up in my head over the last couple months is “victim.” Not in a menacing or threatening way & not in a mocking sort of way, but a call to pay attention & to step up.

Basically, I have had the sense this year that the main way I would describe me in my life increasingly so over the last 12 years is with the word “victim.”

Victim of circumstances. Victim of hard situations. Victim of unkindness/meanness. Victim of stress. Victim of loneliness. Victim of misunderstandings. Victim of the consequences of my poor health. Victim of my limiting back pain. Victim of my brain fog. Victim of lacking support/compassion. Victim of language barriers. Victim of terrible, literal storms. Victim of lacking in friendships. Victim of feeling like an outsider wherever I go. Victim, victim, victim.

All of these things have piled up…. They’ve latched on to the previous, making each one seem heavier to carry than the last. They’ve made me shrink back a little more with each one.

God Has Continued to Teach Me… But the Undercurrent Has been Strong

Obviously, I have noticed them & I have wrestled through them & I have prayed & I have seen God work & I have even lived as an open book to allow even my worst handlings of them to bring glory to God & point others to Him as their source of true HOPE.

But what I didn’t notice was the subtler side effect. The shrinking. The changing of my perspective of the world around me—going from a girl full of hope, wonder, & joy, to one who instantly assumes this will be another circumstance to bring me low… shrinking a little more with each time.

Jaded is what it’s made me. It has sapped my joy from me. It has made me far more anxious & tired & just uninterested in trying again, of putting myself out there again. More closed off. Less vulnerable, less approachable.

I don’t like it.

The Me I Was 12 Years Ago

I get a little choked up thinking about my perspective even 12 years ago before moving overseas. How bright & happy I was. Sure, I had hard days & times of stress or worry or failure… but overall, I was so full of hope.

I trusted God more.

Now it’s often more of a “how will THIS let me down this time?” as if it’s expected or guaranteed—even when just having hope for a productive day swept out from under me by my back just giving out or my brain fog swooping in so heavily over my brain that I go numb & zone out, as my day goes partially wasted. A victim to my own body failing me even sometimes.

I just start a lot of my days expecting defeat.

A Battle Cry for Change

And so, this little word seems to keep popping up in my head every time something like that happens—VICTIM—almost as if it is trying to sum up the gist of the dark cloud I feel has been following me & gradually growing over me these last 12 years, gradually sapping away my hope, joy, vulnerability, peace.

So, what to do about it? How can I make it stop? I am supposed to live as “more than conquerors in Christ,” (Romans 8:31-39) & this seems so the opposite of that. So, what can I do about it?

2 Ways to Stop Living Life as a Victim of My Circumstances

Well, the answer has been coming to me in 2 different ways as I have been asking God those above questions.

1–What parts of your victimhood CAN you control or do something about?

2–Stop perpetuating the negative that DOES happen to you & purposefully fix your thoughts more regularly on what is going RIGHT in purposed gratefulness to God. Because bad & good are always both happening at once in ways—but where am I fixing my focus?

A Lesson I Learned 2 Years Ago, Moving Back to Guam

So, starting with the second, I will say that God has been reminding me of when we moved back to Guam 2 years ago. (How has it already been 2 years?)

I didn’t want to come here again. I had mainly very hard memories of here. I felt I had finally gotten past this hard season of my life. I was so mad at God for even initially suggesting we were to move back here through the doors He was opening against my will.

Well, I prayed, unwillingly, “Okay God, I know You ought to win. I get that. You know better than me. You have a plan. I know that. But I don’t like it & knowing that is not going to make me like it, so please help change my attitude.”

His Response? Find Ways to Praise Him

His answer? Thank Him for THREE things, just 3 things EVERY single day (even if they were the SAME 3 things)… 3 things I DID like about being here. You know what my 3 things were consistently for MONTHS? Palm trees, beach views, & ocean breezes. For MONTHS that’s most all I could come up with–that regardless of all else, at least I had those.

But focusing on praise for His blessings in the midst of my hurt did something funny. I started to NOTICE those 3 little things more often & more readily. I started to APPRECIATE them more. I started to appreciate what a BLESSING it was that God had given me the chance to experience those again after our 7 years away in Japan.

Funny, huh? It’s almost like God knows what He’s doing….

Find Ways to Thank God, Even in the Hard–Fix Your Focus

Now, He is encouraging me with the same thing. “What place or person or situation makes you feel like a victim & what about them can you purposely give God thanks & praise?”

It’s funny that our weekly couple’s devotional: “Devotions for a Sacred Marriage,” by Gary Thomas, (HIGHLY recommend!) mentioned in yesterday’s reading that the same can happen with marriage. We see the worst of each other–the bad days, bad attitudes, failures, flaws, etc. & if we focus only on that, it can seem impossible… but that we need to look at the big picture (which our pastor also talked about in his sermon yesterday) to work toward intentionally appreciating our spouse & our marriage. Fixing our focus on the blessings of the whole versus the right now.

So, I need to work on retraining my brain to focus on the blessings more than I fixate on the hard things, remembering to give God thanks in all things, so I don’t become jaded & poisoned by the hard. (1 Thessalonians 5:18; Philippians 4:8)

Where do you park your focus? Where do I park mine?

What Is in My Power to Change or Adjust?

Then there is the first—the things I can do something about.

Now, when I feel small, jaded, or that little reminder of “victim” pops up in my head, since I have been praying about this for a while… I think, “where do I need to retrain my thoughts to not automatically go into victim-mode, by finding something positive to praise God for? OR, what part of this do I have some control in changing so I don’t just accept defeat & slink back?”

For example, I can’t help that I have the back of a woman twice my age that seizes up & makes me go rigid in pain sometimes… but I can pray for alternative methods of doing things (like when I prayed how to clean our floor-to-ceiling glass shower with a bad back & God orchestrated me thinking to look up long-handled cleaning brushes where I don’t have to lean or stretch/strain my back to clean). Don’t just give up–PRAY & trust God sees an answer where you don’t.

What CAN I Do About It?

Or maybe change looks like taking some small steps in the right direction where you have been unmoved or going in the wrong direction.

Steps for future change might look like me using a posture corrector to help strengthen my spine or taking walks & snacking less unhealthily & making better food choices so I am not essentially carrying around an extra 100 pounds every day. NO WONDER my back is damaged!

Or maybe, if someone is being unkind, I can do things to make the atmosphere more pleasant & love-filled versus tense. I can start praying for that person.

Victimhood Brought on by Anxiety…

A big one for me is when I feel overwhelmed & don’t know what to do next, ANXIETY is there to knock out my knees, so that I crumble & become paralyzed in my progress.

And last time it happened… my little “anti-word” of the year came up to greet me– “VICTIM.”

I have been allowing my anxiety… my THOUGHTS to control me.

How much of my life vapors away because I let my THOUGHTS control me? How much has been wasted or slumped or crumbled? Because of my THOUGHTS?

Why do I let mere thoughts control my life? Control my peace? My happiness? My actions? ME?

What Makes YOU Feel Like a Victim?

VICTIM. Does that word whisper over your heart right now?

VICTIM. Does that word make you slink back & slump in defeat?

VICTIM. Does that word make you feel jaded against the world, as if you are just a victim of your life?

VICTIM. Let’s not let that mental state or perspective control our lives anymore.

Take Steps. Make Change. Fix Focus.

Be purposeful in praise.

Be intentional in prayer & trusting GOD to be BIGGER than ANYTHING else.

Be quick to look at the situation or circumstances that make you feel small & think, “what in this do I have control over to STOP?”

Be mindful of your thoughts that you are allowing to run your life.

Maybe it’s your attitude. Maybe it’s your habits that lead you always downward. Maybe it is a LACK of GOOD habits. Maybe it’s your thoughts. Maybe it’s a lack of gratitude & praise to God in your life.

What is it? What can you change?

Don’t Live as a Victim Anymore

What person, place, situation, or circumstance do you need to spend some time even begrudgingly asking God to help change your attitude… to find ways & things to praise God for even in it?

Are you going to keep letting your VICTIM status control your life & your mindset? Or are you going to live in the freedom bought for you by CHRIST? Living as a CONQUEROR & no longer like a victim….

Shine HOPE by taking on this “anti-word” of 2024—VICTIM–letting it be a constant reminder to turn to & trust God, to find things to praise Him for, & looking for what you have control over in preventing that victimhood from taking you down with it anymore.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement right here on my blog/website @ www.MichelleHydeOnline.com.

Share with friends & family… & SUBSCRIBE by “Joining My Tribe,” so you never miss a week!

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

A Note from Michelle:

(***Check out my FREE Journal Printable Resources: “Accountability Partner Guide + Question Prompts” & “Bible Study Question Prompts ,” as well as “Prayers of Surrender” prayer guides!***)

This blog/website has been running for SIX years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” tab. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” tab, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox (make sure to check your other inbox folders), along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Consider these pieces when shopping for friends, family, or yourself. Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Silver Fanfare Earrings (PERU)

Trades of Hope, Silver Fanfare Earrings, Peru, My "Anti-Word" for 2024--"VICTIM"
(Shown: Silver Fanfare Earrings, handcrafted in Peru. Purchase these earrings to empower women in Peru out of poverty.)

Handcrafted in Peru, these show-stopping, silver-plated fan earrings are made in a workshop committed to empowering the next generation with traditional Artisanal skills training. The Silver Fanfare Earrings hang vertically in a textured semicircle shape and create dignified jobs for women to pursue their higher education studies.

***Purchase these earrings to help provide safe jobs with fair wages for women in areas of extreme poverty in Peru.***

How You Can Help the Artisans & Support My Website:

#1 is PRAY. Financial help is great & helps pay my website fees & helps support these women artisans… but God’s help is always needed most… both for encouragement & for spiritual hope, through Jesus, for the women we support through our ethical fashion purchases. Always PRAY first.

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me in continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win-win-win!

Love ya lots! Have a wonderful week!

Uncategorized

What Even Is Prayer?

July 13, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments

Do You Eye Roll When Someone Offers to Pray for You?

I have seen eye rolls in response to people saying they will pray for them—even eye rolls from Christian friends to other Christian friends. This shows me that there are some who simply do not understand the power & purpose of prayer.

I must admit that at times in my life, I have been amongst those doing the eye rolls, which eventually spurned me to pray about & seek to better understand it… & I’ve learned some things along the way.

Vain Repetitions?

For one, prayer has seemed to become seen as the “vain repetitions” that the Bible warns us against so strongly. (Matthew 6:7) Repeating religious sounding prayers or using many words to sound spiritual has absoutely no power.

Listing things & then saying “amen” does nothing, either. We can’t control God’s actions by using the right words or the right amount of words.

I also understand wanting to teach children how to pray, but we ought to be careful that we don’t further promote these empty, vain repetitions, whether it be a quotable children’s prayer before a meal, or one before bed, or even a quick adult prayer before a meal—they are often just spewed off without much thought or heart behind them… just “Christian words” built in as an expected “good Christian” ritual to do before we eat or sleep, neglecting to teach the true power behind prayer—the One to Whom we pray.

What Is Prayer to You?

Saying we’ll pray for someone is even the Christian-learned response to someone’s distress or problems… but how often are those issues actually prayed for?

When you pray, do you just list off your needs like a checklist?

Do you decide what you need or want & then come to God to carry them out for you?

Do you plan your life & ask God to make it  happen?

And if so… do you get mad, feel jaded or neglected when God does not carry it out as such? What is prayer to you?

At the Feet of Jesus

Consider Mary, in the story told of her & her sister hosting Jesus at their home. (Luke 10:38-42) Where was Mary? She was sitting at Jesus’ feet, soaking up His wisdom & teaching, sitting in awe of her LORD.

Or David, & other authors of the Psalms, how their prayers were raw, didn’t hold back in their anger or hurt or fear or emotions… but always made a point to direct their hearts to the faithfulness, love & power of GOD. (Psalm 73)

Moses understood… eventually… that God was the One to supply the power in his obedience to God’s leading… & so trusted God to provide where he could not. (Exodus 4)

These aren’t passive, regurgitated prayers or prayers out of habit or “just in case” prayers, these are prayers of FAITH, understanding that their prayers don’t have power because of the level of their faith or the use of the right words, but because of WHOM they place their faith!

These are prayers of humility, repentance, coming before a Holy ALMIGHTY GOD, imploring of Him as someone who deserves absolutely nothing, but simultaneously understands the absolute generosity, power, & love of their LORD.

Have You Been Praying about It?

When I ask you, “Have you been praying about it?” I am not offering some trite Christianese solution, I am asking if you have been trusting your own personal wisdom, that of others, your efforts, outside solutions… or whether you have trusted GOD Almighty to be the One Who absolutely knows how to help & CAN help you in whatever situation it is you find yourself.

Bowing it before God, humbly imploring Him for a solution & help is THE BEST place you will find the answers to what you are seeking/need.

Coming to me or someone else is not anything close to what God can do!

We Don’t Control God

God is not someone you come to to carry out your plans & give you what you want & make all your dreams come true… He is GOD ALMIGHTY, whom you bow before, humbly offering your requests, trusting boldly that He invites your petitions with open arms.

It is an honor & a privilege. It is an immense blessing. It is not to be taken lightly. We don’t control God.

Because of all this, a single prayer holds more power than an entire planet of people putting their minds, strength, & efforts together to make something happen… more than all the self-will & self-determination & planning & efforts one can even dream to muster.

A single prayer holds more power than your wildest dreams, & God is able to immeasurably more than you can ask or even imagine through a prayer (Ephesians 3:20-21)…. Because prayer is an act of trust, turning to GOD instead of to yourself or to human efforts.

What Prayer Is Not

But prayer doesn’t mean an automatic, guaranteed way to get your way. It is a bowing to His way & trusting His way to be better than yours no matter the appearances or your feelings in the moment… trusting He knows what He is doing best.

Doubting, turning to Him as a “just in case” or “backup” while turning elsewhere as well, will not get you an answer. God wants you to know that you know that you know that it was from HIM. (James 1:6-7) He’s not the backup. He’s the solution.

Also, if you don’t ask, you can’t expect to receive. Because again, you trusted in something other than Him. Or, if you ask for something that dishonors God or to spend on your own pleasures, don’t expect to get anything from God in that. (James 4)

Peace IN the Storm

Prayer doesn’t mean an automatic, guaranteed out for any pain or struggle or hardship, either. It is a bowing to His leading, His strength, His peace in the storms to carry you through whatever may come.

There is a little verse I need to regularly remind myself of—about impossible peace… peace in the midst of situations that would naturally erase any chance of hope. Because God CAN where we CAN’T. (Philippians 4:6-7; Isaiah 26:3)

It’s not easy to do, to bow what we think we have to have or what we think we NEED or what we think we have all figured out… to defer to God & His wisdom instead, relinquishing your imagined sense of “power” & “control” in a situation, to LET Him be GOD, but BOY is it WORTH it.

God knows what He is doing 100% while we only see or think or understand in PART.

Yes, we can certainly ask God for help, for wisdom, for what we wish… while understanding that He ought to have the final say… while trusting that God will take care of you quite sufficiently EVEN IF He chooses not to answer the way you wish… because He knows better.

(*An encouraging song that has helped me understand this is “Sometimes He Calms the Storm [& Other Times He Calms His Child]” by Joshua Bullock.*)

How to Pray & When

When we pray before a meal, it ought not be a ritualistic routine, but also doesn’t need to be a long drawn-out, “more religious” type of prayer… but mirroring Jesus’ habit of a simple voicing of gratitude for God’s provisions. (Luke 22:19; John 6:11)

When we pray for a friend, it’s not about “saying all the right words” or something nice to do to be “a good Christian,” but rather an act of humility & trust & understanding that God is more capable than you or anyone else to help them.

God says to “pray without ceasing,” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18) as if, instead of having inner dialogue, you recognize He can hear your thoughts & so direct them to Him as a conversation in your thoughts, recognizing He is ever with you & hears you & cares for you. (1 Peter 5:6-7; Proverbs 3:5-7)

Who Do We Pray To?

The Bible says that fearing God is the BEGINNING of WISDOM. (Proverbs 9:10) Why? Because it’s an understanding that God is GOD… & I am NOT. Do you pray like that?

Trusting yourself over a God Who knows & sees all & holds all power to create the world & everything in it… well, it’s simply not wise.

We can trust Him. Even when He doesn’t give us any of what we so strongly are convinced that we absolutely cannot live without. He is God & I am not. I can trust Him.

He loves us with an incomprehensible love… a love that compelled Him to send Jesus to pay for the debt we could never come close to paying. God LOVES you… & if He gave His Son to redeem us from the wrath we deserve, how much more can we expect Him to care for us in life? (Romans 8:32)

What Even Is Prayer?

What even is prayer?

If you think your prayers hold no power… is it because your prayers are more about a backup effort to carry out your plans & your will… more about trusting yourself or regurgitating Christian-sounding words… more than they are about submitting your requests to a HOLY ALMIGHTY GOD who loves you & gave so much already for you because of that love?

Let your prayers be a reflection of trust, of hope in Him, of that humble understanding of all He is.

He is worth trusting in every time; & a single prayer to GOD is worth infinite of anything else because He can do what no one else can.

God Can

When life crumbles around me

When life swallows me up like an insurmountable rush of destruction

When life threatens & mocks & rips at me

When I’m not wanted

When I feel alone

When I am criticized & ridiculed

When I feel no one is on my side

When all my efforts fall flat

When everything I try fails miserably

When nothing I work so hard at seems to make a dent

When life strangles me, smacks me, or turns its back on me

When peace seems an extreme impossibility

God can.

God’s peace can swell & overcome

God has a plan & will turn it for my good & His glory

GOD can be TRUSTED.

God is LOVE.

God sent Jesus to die for the sins of the world (including mine)

God sent Jesus to die for the sins I could never repay

God accepts all those who repent of their sins & who accept the payment His Son gave for us

God forgives

God is ENOUGH

God answers prayers

So. Pray.

Do You Need to Adjust How You Pray?

Are you an eye roller toward prayer? Do you maybe need to reassess the purpose or power of prayer? The Power behind prayer being not the words you say, but the God to Whom you say those words to?

Do you need to adjust how you pray?

Shine HOPE, by praying in humility, trusting in the absolute power & overwhelming love of our great God Almighty.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

Share with friends & Subscribe by Joining My Tribe, so you never miss a week.

A Note from Michelle:

This blog/website has been running for SIX years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Fiesta Earrings (INDIA)

Trades of Hope, Fiesta Earrings, India, What Even Is Prayer
(Shown: Feista Earrings, handmade in India. Purchase these earrings to empower women in India out of poverty!)

Make a summertime fair-trade fashion statement with the Fiesta Earrings! These gorgeous beaded tassel earrings feature a triangular gold-tone frame and colorful beaded fringe in shades of blue, pink, orange, tan, and cream. These unique artisanal earrings are handcrafted in a workshop in India that’s committed to fighting child marriage and helping women become financially independent as fair-trade Artisans.

How You Can Help:

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me to continue supporting them as well as continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win win!

Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith, Prayer, Salvation & Grace, Uncategorized

We Need Each Other—The Desperate Need for Discipleship

July 8, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments
We Need Each Other—The Desperate Need for Discipleship

Church or Christian Country Club?

I noticed this a couple decades ago & now even more so, but in a country that was once known as a Christian nation, it has seemed that, even in my youth, church is oftentimes more about attending because that’s how we grew up or in order to be a “good Christian,” rather than any particular personal investment or much heart surrender on the part of many whose lives I observed outside of church.

It has also seemed, in many churches I witnessed through the years, church has been treated as more of a Christian country club rather than a body of believers submitted to & serving Jesus Christ—a place to feel good rather than a place of humble sacrifice to Him.

Do we get encouragement at church? Yes, of course. But that ought not be its main function… to FEEL good.

This mindset is often evident in arguments within the church about music taste or carpet colors or other inconsequential things.

Church is not about focusing on us & our comfort & our feelings. Church is about coming together to worship the God Whom we serve, He Who made heaven & earth & all that is in it. It is about bowing our lives to Him to be used as He pleases, even if uncomfortable or lacking “fun.” It is to glorify HIM & make HIM known & seen. It is about learning how to know & love Him better.

A Dangerous Shift in Thinking

How does this sort of thing happen? Where church becomes more about an emotional high & a social gathering rather than serving & submitting to God Almighty?

Well, another deficit I have witnessed is the alarming lack of personal discipleship… aka walking alongside each other in life, pointing one another continually to God’s Truth & the hope we have because of Jesus, resetting our compass to always point to Him & His Word (the Bible), living our lives, whether we eat or drink or whatever we do… doing it ALL for the glory of God. (1 Corinthians 10:31)

That is NOT natural.

It is definitely not natural for me! I mean, sure, there are times where it seems to come more effortlessly. But it is far too easy for me to stray & live for myself instead of for God.

We NEED each other in this regard. We should not neglect the importance & great value of discipleship. Discipleship ought to be a heavy focus in every church as we all seek how we may better please & honor God with the entirety of our lives versus just Sunay mornings & praying before meals.

Pour into the Lives of Others!

I think one of the big LIES satan has infused into much western Christian culture thinking is the fact that you must be a Bible scholar or ministry major or church leadership to be involved in discipleship. This is NOT the case.

God is talking to ALL of us when He commands us to “GO & MAKE DISCIPLES of all nations.” (Matthew 28:19-20) The Bible ALSO says that the older women ought to teach the younger women. (Titus 2:3-5)

We need each other. We ought to be growing so that we may invest in the growth of women younger than us—AKA discipleship.

The Bible says that iron sharpens iron… (Proverbs 27:17) that everything we say ought to be for the edification (building up) of those who hear it. (Ephesians 4:29)

We need each other. We need constant reminders to reset course to always be seeking Jesus, to know & love Him more.

We All Need Focus Resets Sometimes, Don’t We?

If you see me wearing shirts with Bible verses or listening to worship music or bringing up spiritual things in “non spiritual conversations,” that’s because I need that constant reset of, “oh yeah, HE is what it is all about… not this… not me… HIM.” I NEED that reminder CONSTANTLY.

We really need each other, guys, because it is way too easy to be fooled by the great deceiver—Satan… to be tempted & distracted away, to live for ourselves & our routines & our habits & our responsibilities & our likes & our problems & the many distractions that surround us everywhere, every day.

We need to be watchful, sober-minded, ready, knowing Satan will forever be trying to lure us away from the God Who gave us everything, through Jesus… to doubt Him & to doubt His love for us & to live for ourselves & our own destruction.

We NEED to be prompting each other toward Jesus.

We Need Each Other—The Desperate Need for Discipleship

Maybe you recognize this & you feel like I am “preaching to the choir.” Maybe you are already living to pour into other women & go alongside them in life to encourage them & continually point them back to truth & the hope we have because of Jesus. YAY! Keep at it. It is the most eternally worthwhile investment you will ever make!

Maybe you recognize this is necessary, but you feel you are far from adequate for the task. Well, you are not alone. I don’t feel adequate! But this isn’t an, “I am better than you,” gig. This is an, “I am a fellow weak one in need of grace wanting to learn to live to point back to Him more & more in all things big or small. Seeking always to know & love Him more.”

You may not be “good at it,” but the good thing is that God doesn’t require you to be good at it. He requires that you trust that He fills in where you lack, & for you to just encourage a constant turning to Him as your help. It takes practice. And in your learning, you will encourage someone else to learn as well. Yay!

How to Do It…

Maybe you recognize it’s importance & WANT to obey in this, but you have ZERO idea where to start…. Well, first, I am going to ask you to pray for it… with a willing heart of obedience, sincerely asking God something like, “God, I want to encourage other women toward You, but have no clue with whom or where to even begin. Please guide me & direct my steps. I desire this. In Jesus’ name, Amen.” If you are hesitating because of perceived inadequacy, “God, please forgive me for avoiding it because of my own lack. Help me better trust Your sufficiency. Lead me as I point others to You. In Jesus’ name, AMEN.”

THEN, ask someone. Maybe you feel a little nudge toward a younger lady who seems to crave learning about God & His Word… maybe you notice a young woman who seems a little on the outside, disconnected… maybe it’s someone who just got saved. No matter where we are on our faith “journey,” we ALL need growth & encouragement.

Maybe all it looks like is meeting for coffee, reading a chapter in the Bible & discussing it. Maybe it looks like sitting at a kitchen table & talking about life, looking up verses that speak to what you’re facing, reminding each other of truth when satan would rather you drown in lies or discontentment or fear or whatever. Maybe it looks like having a prayer topic sheet list where you take turns praying over each thing, seeking Him together.

Seeking Him Is Our Greatest Reward

(***If you would like an accountability partner guide that you could use for this, I have produced a free printable download in the resource tab of my website. This is something God encouraged me with when I prayed for help in this area. It is not the “holy grail” of guides, because God knows each individual’s specific needs, but it can provide a starting point as you learn & grow. It’s been helpful to me anyway, so feel free to check it out, download it for free (no strings attached), & use it as you get started. You can find that FREE download, here: www.MichelleHydeOnline.com/abiding-in-Him/***)

What holds you back? Repent of fearing that over trusting God, trust Jesus paid for it, & ask for a way forward, trusting He will provide. Because He will.

Shine HOPE by determining to live a life of consistent discipleship, always pointing others to your hope in HIM.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

Share with friends & Subscribe by Joining My Tribe, so you never miss a week.

A Note from Michelle:

This blog/website has been running for SIX years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Sicilian Grove Lumbar Pillow Cover (INDIA

Trades of Hope, Sicilian Grove Lumber Pillow Cover, India, We Need Each Other—The Desperate Need for Discipleship
(Shown: Sicilian Grove Lumbar Pillow Cover, traditionally block-printed in India. Purchase this pillow cover using the link found below to empower women in India to rise out of area’s of deep poverty.)

Traditionally block printed, this beautiful bright yellow and deep-green floral Sicilian Grove Pillow Cover is the perfect addition to your summer home decor. Blending ancient Artisan traditions with modern function, women in India handcraft this beautiful block-printed design of birds, pomegranates, and florals.

***Purchase the Sicilian Grove Pillow Cover to create necessary jobs for women in India to rise out of the grip of poverty to impact the lives of their families and their communities.***

How You Can Help:

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me to continue supporting them as well as continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win win!

Flushing Bad Habits, God in Our Suffering, God-Centered Perspective Shifts, Living Your Faith, Prayer, Salvation & Grace

How to Deal with Anger

June 30, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments

A Topic Worth Revisiting

This is something I have definitely talked about before, but because I am currently feeling I need reminders in this area, I thought it would be good to revisit it, even if just for my own sake.

Oh, anger. It’s so easy to justify sometimes, isn’t it? Holding onto it, I mean.

I feel emotions strongly…. I don’t do small emotions. It annoys people sometimes & I get it… it annoys me sometimes, too.

And growing up, I always believed, whether it was implied or told, that “good Christians are not supposed to feel big emotions—especially ‘bad’ ones like anger.”

But telling someone not to feel anger is like telling someone not to feel physical pain when injured… it’s silly, lacks any compassion, & just is not realistic or reasonable. And it is certainly not kind.

Anger just sort of shows up, whether you want it to or not.

Minimizing Wrongs Is Not the Same As Trusting God with It (Read That Again)

Well, I didn’t know how to just not be angry in order to “be a good Christian,” but I felt I had to avoid or deny or stuff feelings if I were to show I “trusted God,” so I would usually cry about it & then convince myself of all the many “reasons to not be mad”:

Like, “I’m sure they didn’t mean it,” or, “they’re probably just having a bad day,” or “they’re a sinner, what do I expect?” Or, “maybe I just deserve it.”

So, what was I doing? I was making excuses FOR their wrong choices. I was JUSTIFYING their wrong choices. I was convincing myself that their wrong choices weren’t all that wrong if I thought hard enough about it.

Wow. NO. Wrong way to deal with it. Don’t do that.

God doesn’t do that (He sent Jesus to DIE for those very wrong choices), (Isaiah 53:3-12) Jesus didn’t do that (He paid for it with His life—WILLINGLY), & even the human authors inspired by God to write the Bible didn’t do that.

So do NOT minimize sin/wrongs in order to manage your anger.

Anger Is Not a Sin… It’s What You DO with Anger That Can Turn It Sinful

Anger is an emotional response to something. It is not a sin. Let me say that again for those who missed it: ANGER is NOT a SIN.

Emotions are not sinful. They are how we were made to feel & connect with the world around us.

The problem comes when we take matters into our own hands. When we determine to HOLD ON to our anger. THAT’S when the red flags start waving & the warning bells start ringing.

Our Anger Is NOT a Valid Excuse for Our Own Sin

I am not endorsing retaliation, vengeance, “them getting what they deserve,” lashing out, bitterness, slander, or any other sinful ways God warns us not to engage in when we’re angry, either. (Read that list here: Colossians 3:8 & Ephesians 4:31-32, even taking a minute to look up what each word actually means, like malice is ill will toward someone & clamor is shouting/making loud noises in anger—taking time to look these up in the dictionary individually will really help that truth settle in your heart.)

So what then? If stuffing it does not prove we “have faith” & reacting the way we often feel like reacting is sin against God… how are we supposed to deal with anger then?

Have You Ever Read through the Psalms?

Well, I get to reading Psalms for the whateverth time & something new starts to dawn on me as I read: David & the other authors of the Psalms did NOT sugar coat their prayers or water them down or “Christianize” them.

Their prayers are raw. Many are ANGRY. Some are even violent. (Read Psalm 143 for an example of big, unfiltered, raw emotions with ANGER involved, too.)

But how do most, if not ALL of these prayers end? … In PRAISE to God, almost a: “THIS IS HOW I AM FEELING!!! … but… God, I trust You because You know what You’re doing & You’re bigger than me & I know I can trust You no matter how awful or out of control things may look right now.

Wow. True FAITH is NOT stuffing emotions or sugar-coating them away… it’s being raw & real with God about said emotions & then remembering all the reasons God is good for it & can be trusted with it.

Not Only Are Feelings Okay… Let’s See How to DEAL with Them

And considering the context of other instances/verses about anger that I had read, it started to all come together with both the angry Psalms & 2 other main verses I noticed:

  1. Be angry & don’t sin—being careful not to give room for the devil to exploit it. (Ephesians 4:26-27)
  2. Love your enemy & pray for those who spitefully use you/persecute you. (Matthew 5:43-44)

Take Stock: What Triggers Your Anger?

Maybe it’s from feeling misunderstood or having your character questioned from said misunderstanding.

Maybe it’s from someone being unkind, aggressive, or ruthless toward you.

Maybe it’s from witnessing a gross injustice.

Maybe it’s from something not going your way or hours of planning & preparation just ending up doing zero good for the situation at hand.

Maybe it’s trauma related & you are cut deeeep.

When Does It Feel Like You Have No Choice but to Steam or Scream?

Maybe it’s watching political parties & so many news channels act more akin to schoolyard bullies rather than grown, professional adults as they represent our country.

Maybe it’s seeing the awful, terrible, long-reaching effects of sin in our world & how ugly it is to watch unfold.

Maybe it’s a diagnosis.

Maybe it’s the death of someone you love.

Maybe it’s birthed from life just being out of your control, like a storm destroying everything around you & you can’t seem to be able to do anything to stop it.

What Makes You So Angry You Forget to Pray about it First?

Maybe your kids back-talked one too many times or a car road-raged against you one too many times or your spouse made a stray stinging comment one too many times.

Or feeling unappreciated, neglected, bullied, ostracized, criticized, alone, wronged, cheated, cheated on, etc.

There’s a lot to get angry about, isn’t there?

And with all of that, I had learned this idea that I am not supposed to feel any of it?

How?!

Anger Is So Tempting to Hold onto, Isn’t It?

I have talked a lot recently about people criticizing & judging & making you feel small. I have experienced all of that, whether intended or not. It hurts… & anger can definitely spring up with hurts like that, along with your gradually shrinking internally.

And anger can feel good, can’t it? Like validation. Like, “yeah, I have a RIGHT to this!” All the while rehearsing the situation over & over & over again in your head?

Anger can feel like control… like we’re taking the control back.

It can feel like if we don’t… they get away with it… like the wrong never happened. And it feels a little bit like: “I can’t ever let that happen.”

But, God warns us not to hold on to our anger. (Hebrews 12:15)

It Comes Back to This Pesky Little Truth: We Need Surrender

Well, this isn’t always the most comfortable or popular answer—& it certainly is NOT a NATURAL response—because refusing to release anger, holding onto it toward bitterness & MORE feels like it’s justified & validating… but the answer is one word that just keeps on coming back up: SURRENDER.

Taking a deep breath… or two… or three…. Closing your eyes….And turning your heart & hurt toward God:

“God, I can’t. I can’t love them. HOW am I supposed to love them? HOW am I supposed to thank You in ALL circumstances? Please forgive me for being so tempted to hate. To rage. To just scream & wish them to get what they ‘deserve.’ I will not avoid or minimize this feeling or deny it happened or justify it for them, because what happened WAS wrong. But I also know that this anger I am feeling, as natural as it is to feel it, ought to be a trigger to pray for the situation… a reminder that I need You & that this person or this situation needs YOU. That’s what the anger should trigger in me rather than me taking control in it. Help me give it to You. Help me to enTRUST it to You. Help every rightful spark of anger lead me back to You for help. Thank You for not holding my own wrongs against me. Jesus paid for this, too. It was no small sacrifice because it was no small wrong. Please help me to also not minimize the sacrifice You gave with Your life, like a lamb to the slaughter… for me… & even for this. Help me to love like You love—even when it is undeserved. Help me let go of needing validation or control, trusting that holding onto it versus trusting You with it IS sin. Help me trust You with it even when it really, really hurts. You are God & I am not. In Jesus’ name, AMEN.”

I’m not saying it’s easy. I’m not even saying it feels good. But it’s what we NEED when we are angry.

Am I Willing to Make the CHOICE?

When I feel angry oh boy do I want to STEW. I want to rehearse. I want to replay it in my head a thousand times to see what I could have done to prevent it or where I messed up or how they could have ever done something like that to me. I feel HURT. I take it personally. I cry & sometimes want to scream. Profanity even slips into my thoughts where I have to lay that down immediately & repent sometimes several times in a row if I am provoked several times in a row. Clenched fists & jaw & sometimes I just want to give up & say, “God, I am ready, bring me home!” When I am hurt, I hurt big sometimes. I feel too weak for this world sometimes because of it.

Responding rightly WHEN we are rightfully angry IS NOT EASY.

But it’s how we ought to respond to our anger nonetheless. It’s a choice we have to CHOOSE to make. We need to INTENTIONALLY turn it over to God & ask for His righteous judgement & able hand to take it from there… to ask for help in learning to thank Him even when everything seems awful, & for help trusting that He really is enough & though anger can feel good, it’s not worth holding onto.

CHOOSE to Praise Him & Trust Him

Shine HOPE by being a quick repenter when your anger tempts you to respond in a way that dishonors or displeases God, choosing to trust God to help you even when everything just feels plain awful.

(***Need a song to help you go from expressing your hurt to God to praising Him for all the MANY reasons you have to trust Him through every bit of any type of anger you may be feeling? Go have a listen to CeCe Winans’ “Goodness of God.” What a humbling song of surrender, washed in His wonderful goodness through ANY trial.***)

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

Share with friends & Subscribe by Joining My Tribe, so you never miss a week.

A Note from Michelle:

This blog/website has been running for almost THREE years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Independence Bracelet Set (UGANDA)

Trades of Hope, Independence Bracelet Set, Uganda, How to Deal with Anger
(Shown: Independence Bracelet Set, handmade in Uganda. Purchase this bracelet below for the opportunity to empower women in Uganda out of poverty!)

LIMITED EDITION – While Supplies Last! Purchase the Independence Bracelet Set to receive the Star-Spangled Bracelet from India and the Firecracker Bracelet from Uganda!

Star-Spangled Bracelet is a fun addition to your festive look, featuring half gold-tone beads and half silver-tone beads. The Firecracker Bracelet is handmade using handmade red paper beads strung by women in Uganda earning a fair wage for their work. Each design is creating safe, fair paying jobs for women in two countries! What a beautiful way to celebrate independence!

How You Can Help:

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me to continue supporting them as well as continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win win!

Flushing Bad Habits, God-Centered Perspective Shifts, Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith, Salvation & Grace

Getting Back Your Zeal for God

June 23, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments
Getting Your Zeal Back for God

Where Do You Feel You May be Compromising?

So last week I challenged us to take stock of areas where we may have compromise or even sin in our lives that we sugar coat or excuse away. I also shared my own personal areas of compromise & sin that I have allowed to creep into my life.

Do you drown out God with busyness? Do you feel bored trying to learn about or hear about God? Do you have trouble feeling you really care about God if you’re really honest with yourself?

Do you feel like you have lost your zeal for God?

I think it’s time to talk about how we can re-spark that lost zeal for Jesus in our hearts.

Just Not Feeling it Anymore?

Do you find yourself sort of mindlessly singing to worship songs or singing out of habit or memory rather than really thinking about what you’re singing & actively lifting up your voice in praise to God?

Do you find yourself only half paying attention as you read your Bible or just skipping it altogether?

Do you find yourself getting so caught up in your day-to-day that you barely even think twice about God because your own happenings consume the totality of your thoughts & time?

Do you ever feel personally attacked when sin or compromise issues are discussed? Recoiling back to what feels safe?

Do you crave your comfort zones more than you crave God?

Yeah, some of that is what I am talking about when I say I have lost my zeal for the Lord.

Find the Root Cause

And last week, we addressed compromise, weights that weigh us down & keep us from growing… strongholds we cling to instead of to God in struggle or distress… sin… & how a lack of zeal is often really a symptom that points to something being amiss.

So, let’s talk about how to reignite that spark & find that zeal for the Lord once more.

First, it takes a willingness to admit something IS amiss versus making excuses for it & burying it. You have to be willing to accept your part in it.

What Then?

And then, well… you need to repent. This isn’t to shame you, because we all fall short… but it is honestly necessary to admit you are one of those who fall short & that you absolutely do require God’s forgiveness & help in change, trusting in Jesus’ sacrifice to pay even that.

Then, start praying over your heart every time God brings it to your attention for one of those areas, trusting that though it may feel completely beyond your control or ability to change… God is bigger than you are.

And really… just that conscious decision to humble yourself, to admit failure/struggle/defeat to God, & then to ask for His forgiveness & help… that’s it right there… that is how to change… submission to Him.

Getting Your Zeal Back for God

Find yourself praying on autopilot? Ask God for forgiveness & for help with focus & reverence.

Find Bible reading boring? Ask God forgiveness for treating His Word so trivially, asking for His help with focus in using that reading to teach you more about Him.

Find yourself singing worship in church on autopilot as well? Apologize to God for being so complacent & for treating Him with less honor & praise than He deserves.

What Satan will try to deceive you into believing is that you ought to STOP doing the right things because you aren’t FEELING it enough… that you’re not “sincere enough.” That. Is. A. LIE. Do it anyway!

***Read “Screwtape Letters,” by C. S. Lewis for a HUGE eye opener on the tricks & deception that Satan often gets us to believe because it seems to make sense on the surface.***

Shine HOPE by bowing to God at every turn in your life… every mistake… every bad thought… every apathetic moment… every time you notice treating Him with less honor than He deserves… every sin… every stronghold… & by trusting that Jesus has already paid in full for ALL of it!

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

Share with friends & Subscribe by Joining My Tribe, so you never miss a week.

A Note from Michelle:

This blog/website has been running for SIX years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Star Stud Set (INDIA)

Trades of Hope, Star Stud Set, India, Getting Your Zeal Back for God

LIMITED EDITION – While Supplies Last! These sets of star-inspired studs are the perfect festive look for this season. These ethically made earrings from India come with a silver-tone and gold-tone set of star design studs with detailed etching marks. The set is perfect to purchase and gift a set to match your friend, daughter, or family member for a fun look! Every purchase creates safe jobs and a dignified income for women in India.

How You Can Help:

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me to continue supporting them as well as continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win win!

Flushing Bad Habits, Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith, Prayer, Salvation & Grace

Why I Have Lost My Zeal for the Lord

June 17, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments

It’s Not a Matter of Just “Try Harder”

So, how do you get back your zeal for God when it has waned?

And this isn’t a “10 steps to be a better Christian” blog, so I am not asking this question to encourage us to pretend or self-will force zeal or excitement for God. This is not something we need to force ourselves to do to be a better Christian.

But it IS a symptom that something is not right… a symptom we ought to pay attention to.

Two Things to Look Out For

For example, at church today, we talked about Hebrews 12:1-2. In these verses, the Bible (God’s Word) instructs us to “lay aside every weight & the sin that so easily ensnares us.”

This really stood out to me, because I feel like this may be my problem. Aside from looking around me for the approval from others as my gauge versus looking to God & His Word (the Bible) as I have been talking a lot about lately, I have recognized some compromise I have allowed to slip into my heart & life.

How can I expect to be excited being in God’s presence & spending time with Him & praising Him if I have done as the Ephesians were chided for in “losing their first love”? They were praised for doing all of these wonderful things for the kingdom of God, but following all of that praise, they were still chided for “losing their first love.” (Revelation 2:1-5)

(***Read more about the dangers of losing your “first love” aka Jesus Christ: “Keep Your WHY in Life Fresh—Don’t Lose Your First Love”***)

And when I start trusting in things other than God as my hope & help (stronghold), or allow myself to excuse that which God condemns (sin), I can expect to not feel that same joy with Him.

“All the Right Things” & Still a Lack

I have let my focus slip from eternally-focused to right-now focused.

I have let my focus slip from turning to God as my hope in all things to trying to just fix it myself with distractions & avoidance.

I still serve Him in prison ministry, children’s church, discipleship, choir, my website/blog, etc.

I still turn to Him in prayer for wisdom & help & direction throughout each day.

I still live to try to point to Him & give Him glory in all things big & small that I may face.

And yet… this consistent symptom of apathy speaks as an annoyingly loud, ringing alarm in my heart that something is not quite right.

What Else Do I Turn To?

So, laying aside every weight, as Hebrews 12 says… what is holding me back from Him? What else do I find myself turning to when I need help? (*And this, I believe, can also include distractions in life that we allow to drown out any chance for time with or for Him.*)

Honestly, when I am stressed or feeling overwhelmed… I just want to feel comfort… or to avoid said feelings altogether. I want to mask over it & make it all just go away.

That’s a major stronghold that I have built up in my life. And it should not be there. It shouldn’t be there because it speaks to a deeper problem—I don’t trust God to be enough for me there.

I am clinging to & turning to something other than God as my help when I do that. In other words, my hope & trust is divided between me & Him.

And if I continue to insist upon that… eventually God will do the most loving thing He could possibly do in that situation… let that crutch fall out from under me & let me fall so that I can grow & learn that it is weak & that He alone is the One in Whom I really ought to trust.

How can I really expect to feel absolute joy in His presence when I don’t really trust Him with EVERYTHING in my life? Holding back & turning to something other than Him?

Compromise Is NOT Okay… No Matter How Easy It Can Feel to Justify

The other problem that can stifle a zeal for God is sin.

I’ve talked over the years about my lifelong battle with fantasizing. (*Read about it in “Lust: The Secret Sin”*) It started when I was very young, seeing a bad scene on a tv show as channels were being flipped through & it led to years of addiction my whole life, justifying it that “if I wasn’t watching real people & it was just made up in my head with made up people, it ‘couldn’t’ be wrong.” But I will tell you right now that after about 30 years of this addiction & the destruction it caused me—it is far from harmless & it is still SIN.

But I didn’t grasp this until the damage was done & I started to learn that the destruction I recognized was rooted in that habit I had had since I was so young.

But a 30-year habit is one hard to root out because by then it is almost second nature… a habit you don’t even have to think about, it just seems sort of natural.

But it is still sin.

The Wretchedness of Sin Must be Recognized

How can I know this about my lust being sin & still have excuses for it at times versus treating it like a deadly disease that MUST be killed off in me?

How can I expect to feel zeal for God when my heart is divided by sin? Allowing something in my heart to exist for which Jesus had to DIE? “Deep-rooted” isn’t an adequate excuse for sin.

Imagine you got caught robbing the king of a country & the penalty is a beheading, but someone offers to take your place, is killed brutally, & then you go back to trying to rob the king again. Like WHAT?!

That’s what I am doing when I choose to allow sin. Jesus already paid for it with His life & I mock that tremendous generosity & love & sacrifice when I make excuses for it & continue to do that for which He has already paid.

Why I Have Lost My Zeal for the Lord

So, I ask myself why I have lost my zeal for the Lord…? Let’s see… People (versus God) pleasing attitude, strongholds present, & excuses made for occasionally allowing sin to exist in my heart? No wonder my zeal for God has waned.

Maybe next week we can talk about how we can weed that stuff out with a good ol’ heart checkup & start growing again in our zeal for God…. But for now, let’s take stock. What are your strongholds? Are you feeling that little pang of guilt? Did something come to mind? What do you need to ask God to forgive you for clinging to in place of Him?

And what about sin habits? Bad attitudes? Yelling at your kids when you’re angry? Lust? Hatred/bitterness/unforgiveness? 

Take inventory. Lay them down as offerings at His figurative feet & ask Him for forgiveness.

My Prayer

Dear Lord, I don’t deserve You. You are so faithful to me & yet I am so wretched. Thank You that Your faithfulness does not depend on mine. Thank You for sending Jesus to pay for my sins. I have nothing of value to offer the God Who made me & Who gave His all for me. You are so Good. Thank You for loving me. Thank You for never ever giving up on me, even though I give You so, so many reasons to choose to do so. Help me to love You better & to live for You better… worthy of all You gave for me, through Jesus. In Jesus’ name, AMEN.

Shine HOPE by recognizing that a lack of zeal for the Lord is usually a SYMPTOM of something that’s not right. Pray about it, don’t excuse it… get rid of it with God’s help. Now.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

Share with friends & Subscribe by Joining My Tribe, so you never miss a week.

A Note from Michelle:

This blog/website has been running for SIX years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Sandstone Crossbody (INDIA)

Trades of Hope, Sandstone Crossbody, India, Why I Have Lost My Zeal for the Lord
(Shown: Sandstone Crossbody, handmade in India. Purchase this bag to help provide safe jobs for women in India.)

This genuine leather woven Sandstone Crossbody from India is both practical and stylish with its adjustable strap, interior zipper pocket, exterior slip pocket, and zipper closure. Keep all your essentials safe and secure anytime you’re on the go. This soft, comfortable, and versatile light camel/beige colored bag with cotton lining will be adorable to style this season.

*****Purchase this crossbody bag & help provide safe jobs with fair wages for women in areas of extreme poverty in India.*****

How You Can Help:

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me to continue supporting them as well as continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win win!

Flushing Bad Habits, God-Centered Perspective Shifts, Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith, Salvation & Grace

Be Bold & Let Him Lead

June 9, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments

Learning to Let Others Dislike Me

I’m wanting to learn to let other people not like me. That’s a hard one for me. Like, really, really hard. Even knowing I want to change–I receive one critical/negative/rude comment & I am ready to crawl back in my hole. *sigh* This is not going to be a quick process, I’m sure.

Now, I don’t mean that I say what I want or do what I want & “who cares?” type attitude.

I have been talking a lot about people-pleasing & judging the small things in others’ lives being a not-so-great idea… how those things have caused me to shrink back & dim, feeling overwhelmed by the feeling of never measuring up to others’ expectations/opinions.

But now, how do I rebuild? I talked about fixing my eyes on Jesus being my starting point, but where do I go from there?

I think the next step is learning to let other people not like me.

God Ought to be the Judge I Look To

If someone disagrees with me speaking up truth or anything really, I need to take it to God for review, & if He gives me peace to continue forward, I need to be okay with them not being okay with that. I ought to let God be the judge I look to. He’s the true One I must answer to.

I know we are called to live peaceably with everyone, as much as it is up to us, (Romans 12:18) but that does not mean compromising my following of God’s lead in order to please others.

I care too much about how people view me, & this ESPECIALLY includes Christians. (I know I have done it to others, TOO!)

Because we can’t read minds & we can’t know all the wisdom & workings of God, it can be easy to make a judgment call when we see someone else doing or saying something that seems out of place to us. (I have even caught myself giving a subtle eye roll to others who may or may not have just been trying to be obedient to a nudge from God in a situation, but shame on me!)

I Must be Bold Like the Disciples… Like JESUS… Were Willing to Be

Just like how I mentioned the disciples, the author’s (through God’s leading) of the Bible, & Jesus even… they were not timid people. They stood firm for truth, even if it led to the risk of their very lives. They spoke boldly the truth of God, in love. (Ephesians 4:15)

Here are some verses you can check out about being bold in & for Jesus Christ:

“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6)

“… proclaiming the kingdom of God and teaching about the Lord Jesus Christ with all boldness and without hindrance.” (Acts 28:31)

“This was according to the eternal purpose that he has realized in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through our faith in Him.” (Ephesians 3:11-12)

“The wicked flee when no one pursues,
    but the righteous are bold as a lion.” (Proverbs 28:1)

We Need to Pray Boldness for Each Other

But it is true, you find those speaking out for Jesus Christ asking the churches to pray that they have the boldness to do so… (Ephesians 6:19-20) & I can see why… It’s easy to want to slink backwards when other people oppose you… especially when they’re other people in the church you look up to & want affirmation & support from. It’s so easy to want that.

So, please, be sure when you think of it to pray the same for me… that I allow God to use the gifting He has given me the way He chooses to use it, versus trying to filter Him.

I shouldn’t be making those calls. He is God. I am not.

Don’t Filter God’s Leading through Your Own Human Understanding/Logic

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Of course I have grown in timidity, because I have been trying to call the shots on which I should follow of God’s leadings because I don’t think it would “go over well with others,” or because, “they won’t understand,” or, “they’ll think of me as a nuisance.”

I’m not leaning into Him, submitting to Him… I am trying to decide for Him. I am trying to be His filter.

Shame on me.

Living to please other people trumping my living to please God.

Shame on me.

In the end, I don’t have to answer to ANYONE other than Him.

Look to the Right Examples

Do I think everyone agreed with & supported Paul? All of the disciples? Jesus? Perfectly sinless, come to save the world, JESUS?

Did they stop being bold for truth because other people even got to the point of HATING & killing them for it? No.

I heard once that if we were to be present back then, with the way we run many churches now, we would be saying, “now now, Paul… there has to be a more sensitive, more politically correct, more palatable way to say this, so let’s calm down now.”

Imagine saying that to JESUS.

Like a Lamb to the Slaughter… Bold in His Love for Us… Even When Those He Came to Save Killed Him

But yet, Jesus went “like a lamb to the slaughter” (Isaiah 53:3-12) to provide a way to save all mankind from their own deserving hell-punishment, WHILE they spat at Him, stripped Him, beat Him, whipped Him, lied about Him, mocked Him, humiliated Him, & eventually KILLED Him.

He never once backed down from what God called Him to, but lived obedience to death, even death on the cross… for us, His mockers.

I don’t even have anyone threatening me other than threatening with their looks that they don’t agree with me or approve of me or like me & I am over here like, “Sorry! I’ll be quiet! Please like me!”

Pathetic. Sad. Disappointing. This should not be so.

I am Saved by the Grace of Jesus Christ!

I’m telling you. God sees everything. He knows everything. And if He were to confront me with it all, I would collapse immovable under the unbearable pressure of it all.

And yet… Jesus… His grace… His faithfulness despite my undeserving.

I don’t want to live compromising anymore. I want to be bold for Him & in Him. I want to live the harmonious balance intended by God—confidence & humility as hand-in-hand. Confidence that it’s all through Him, not anything I have to offer… & humility for that same exact reason.

I don’t want to walk around wearing a badge of shame that I am never measuring up to everyone’s opinions & expectations… I want to walk around boldly with a badge of honor that I am saved by God’s grace, through Jesus Christ our LORD.

HIS righteousness accounted to me because of HIS sacrifice for me.

Shine HOPE by determining to walk boldly for Him, even when others oppose you or disapprove, letting HIM be your strength where you lack, giving you confidence to live a life BOLDLY for Him.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement right here on my blog/website @ www.MichelleHydeOnline.com.

Share with friends & family… & SUBSCRIBE by “Joining My Tribe,” so you never miss a week!

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

A Note from Michelle:

(***Check out my FREE Journal Printable Resources: “Accountability Partner Guide + Question Prompts” & “Bible Study Question Prompts ,” as well as “Prayers of Surrender” prayer guides!***)

This blog/website has been running for over 5.5 years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” tab. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” tab, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox (make sure to check your other inbox folders), along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Consider these pieces when shopping for friends, family, or yourself. Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Sicilian Grove Tea Towel (INDIA)

Trades of Hope, Sicilian Grove Tea Towel, India, Be Bold & Let Him Lead
(Shown: Sicilian Grove Tea Towel, block printed & handmade in India. Purchase this hand towel to empower women in India out of extreme areas of poverty.)

LIMITED EDITION – Available While Supplies Last! Traditionally block printed, this beautiful bright yellow and deep-green floral tea towel is the perfect addition to your summer kitchen display. Blending ancient Artisan traditions with modern function, women in India handcraft this beautiful block-printed design featured on the tea towels. Sold individually or purchase as a set! Pair with our Sicilian Grove Lumbar Pillow Cover for an entire home refresh look!

*****Every purchase of the Sicilian Grove Tea Towel creates necessary jobs for women in India to rise out of the grip of poverty to impact the lives of their families and their communities. *****

How You Can Help the Artisans & Support My Website:

#1 is PRAY. Financial help is great & helps pay my website fees & helps support these women artisans… but God’s help is always needed most… both for encouragement & for spiritual hope, through Jesus, for the women we support through our ethical fashion purchases. Always PRAY first.

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me in continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win-win-win!

Love ya lots! Have a wonderful week!

Flushing Bad Habits, God-Centered Perspective Shifts, Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith, Salvation & Grace

The Urgent Need to Stop Judging Others… Not What You Think…

June 2, 2024by Michelle HydeNo Comments
The Urgent Need to Stop Judging Others... Not What You Think...

This Is What I am NOT Talking About…

I know some of you are not going to get what I’ve been talking about lately, in this recent series, but I also know there are some of you out there, like me, who will relate really hard to this.

(Catch up by reading my recent posts on this topic: “How I Let My Light be Dimmed,” “When Life Hits Me Hard, I Just Want Heaven,” & “Fixing My Focus.”)

This topic is not meant to preach a “you only live once, do what you want, follow your heart, live your best life, live a main character sort of life” vibe. (When I hear those things, I always think of the meme that says, “When someone says to ‘follow your heart’: ‘Thanks, Satan!'” The Bible warns us quite thoroughly that “following your heart” is a terrible idea.) (Jeremiah 17:9; Proverbs 3:5)

This topic is not meant to preach at you to not care what anyone says & not care how your words or actions may affect someone else… to live a you-centered life.

This topic is also not meant to preach that you will never have areas of which you need to do some personal work, even when it feels uncomfortable to admit/accept.

Be Careful Not to Throw It ALL Out… But PRAY

But what this topic-train I have been riding lately IS meant to communicate is that I should not take AS Scripture the opinions people have on me that the Holy Spirit has not impressed upon my heart already &/or that the Bible doesn’t specifically mention, & I do mean to include those things which are implied, as in, if God tells us to love others, we probably shouldn’t SPIT on them, even though the Bible does not specifically say not to ever spit on anyone. Get me?

It is wise to mention here that if something they mention stirs some guilt or shame in my heart, it would be a good idea to be willing to submit it to God for review, by praying & asking God if this is Him nudging a warning of need for change in this area, or if it is self-inflicted grief… in case God IS convicting my heart to change in an area that is different from how I grew up/learned.

Because, despite pure or misguided intent, God could use their words to draw attention to an area you have been holding back from Him, so don’t beat yourself up over it & don’t automatically dismiss it, either. PRAY about it.

But Please Stop Beating Yourself into a Hole Whenever Someone Comes at You

I mentioned the need to pray versus beating myself up. THAT is where I have been failing. THAT is where the hurt, dimming of my light, overwhelming need-to-please was birthed.

I need to learn to better separate the two.

Ie. Someone points something out… even judgy toward me… sticking their nose up at me, but not really thinking they’re intending to (self-righteousness is a sneaky bugger)… & instead of bowing it to God for review & trusting Jesus has paid in full for it already (aka no need for shame), I beat myself up over it as one more failure… one more reason why I am not good enough… one more reason why I am failing at being a “good Christian.”

I grow in timidity & fear instead of humility & confidence.

(*Read about that harmonious meant-to-be balance, here: “Confidence & Humility–The God-Honoring Balance.”)

Honor Someone’s Conscience–The Holy Spirit Could be Asking of Them Differently Than You

If someone thinks clothing standards (such as length or to show or not to show the shoulders, etc.) should be different than how you learned growing up, or whether certain silly words still count as curse words or not, or really anything that is different than how you learned or grew up believing….

Well, that is totally fine if they feel convicted about that & so do it to honor God… that is exactly what they should be wearing or what they should be abiding by, if this be the case… but EVEN IF they ARE doing it to be on a whole other level of spiritual (hint: it doesn’t work that way), or as an excuse to turn their noses up at me… well, I do not need to take that personally. (I also don’t need to be trying to convince them to stop personally doing it, in case it is indeed something God has put on their heart for a matter of surrender to Him.)

I CAN pray for them, though, that if they ARE doing it out of some legalistic intent (aka trying to earn their right to Heaven through being a “good” person), that God help them be set free from those chains.

We can’t go around judging everyone else, guys, even if what they believe doesn’t align with how we’ve always done it. Whether they’re “overly sensitive” or don’t seem to care “enough” based on the rules you grew up believing.

If it’s not sin–it’s not our place to judge.

We’re All a Work in Progress

We are all on this same journey of being very imperfect people, loved by a very perfect (holy) God.

We are all (all who have submitted their lives to Christ, by repenting/turning away from their sin life & turning to trust in Jesus Christ to both pay for their sins & to trust Him as LORD of their lives)… we are all in the process of being sanctified (being made more & more like Jesus, through cooperation with God’s work in our lives).

It’s a process. It’s one we will not complete on this side of heaven.

And it is one where we are all at different places in different areas of our hearts/lives.

Some have “mastered” one area, while they are still flailing about in another.

Some seem so weak in some areas, but are so matured in others.

There are so many things we get wrong every single day, that if God were to open our eyes to them all at once & say, “CHANGE! NOW! OR ELSE!” we would probably all just want to kill ourselves or die because the weight would be too much to bear. It would literally be impossible.

God Is Much Gentler with Us Than We Are with Each Other

God knows literally everything about us. Have you ever really stopped to think about the implications of that? He knows EVERYTHING.

But He, knowing EVERYTHING we could be working on… is gentle… is kind & patient… knows that Jesus already paid for it all. God is much gentler with us than we often are with each other.

That doesn’t mean I get a free pass to live however I want. But that DOES mean I don’t have to pretend God demands it all done, all at once, immediately. It means I don’t have to live in a constant state of beating myself up for all the ways I don’t measure up.

We’re harder on ourselves than He is. We’re harder on each other than He is.

That should not be.

Direct Sin Is Different!

Sure, if someone is directly sinning, God says we save a person by pulling him back from it. YES. (James 5:19-20)

And the speck versus log passage everyone seems to use as a “DON’T JUDGE ANYONE” verse, actually says, “UNTIL you have taken the log out of your own eye.” (Matthew 7:3-5)

We ought to encourage & urge one another toward holiness, YES. (1 Thessalonians 5:11)

But pointing fingers at everything all the time is not accomplishing that, sister. It’s just not.

Don’t try to be the Holy Spirit to people on all the small stuff.

Let Him be HIM to them.

God Cares about Them, So PRAY for Them

If it really worries you THAT much, well, pray for your own heart, whether you have had some self-righteousness sort of sneak in there… that God help reveal it to you & humble you.

And pray for THEM, too. Pray that if you ARE right for feeling those things about whatever it is with them… that God reveal it to them.

Because guess what, God cares more about that person than He does about how long their shorts are. There, I said it.

Everything Is Permissible… But Not Everything Is Beneficial…

And there is so much more that we judge & are judged for, isn’t there? Stuff the Bible doesn’t say is a direct sin problem… more of a: “Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial,” type thing, maybe? (1 Corinthians 10:23-33)

And maybe God has revealed to you that something is not beneficial to you & you have chosen to give it up. YAY! GREAT choice! But that doesn’t mean to now go on a crusade making sure everyone else around you also chooses that give it up.

How many permissible-but-not-beneficial things are we making into non-permissible things because it’s the way we grew up… things we have become self-righteous about unintentionally?

That is what I am talking about.

But also, don’t flaunt something you feel peace about around someone who struggles with it. Because, if it is something God has asked of them, you may tempt them to disobey God on that issue. Be careful. (1 Corinthians 10:23-33)

God Looks at the Heart… Man Looks at Outward Appearances (1 Samual 16:7)

God does not condemn dancing. He warns against tempting others or being sensual. (Ephesians 4:19)

God does not condemn shorts. He warns to be modest. (1 Timothy 2:9)

God does not condemn being artistic. HE is very creative & artistic. (Psalm 146:6)

God does not condemn worship music because it isn’t a hymn. He warns about doing things for appearance versus surrender. (Matthew 23:28)

Be careful setting up parameters that are not outlined by God Himself (in the Bible) & asking others to abide by them in order to “be pleasing to God.” Be careful speaking FOR God to others.

Be Careful Speaking as Biblical Standard What God Himself Has Not Spoken as Biblical Standard

Sometimes traditions are good. They set us up as reminders of all the goodness of God & His wonderful work & blessings. They help us commit to Him our all versus parts of us.

But, if we begin to worship our traditions, they can become empty & not what they were intended for, actually beginning to cause damage. Be careful. They can become divisive & condemning.

“It’s wrong because our church doesn’t do that,” is not the same as, “God says not to do that.” Be careful that you do not speak FOR God to others. Be careful you don’t place chains on someone He Himself didn’t command.

Fixing My Focus

As I mentioned last week in, “Fixing My Focus,” I want to take all of those chains off that I have allowed others to put on me over the years. That’s what this whole series has been about.

I want to honor & please God. I want to worship Him with all of me.

Lately, though, I have become drowned in everyone’s judgments & opinions that I allow to weigh down on me far too much.

I don’t want to live like that anymore. It’s stifling. It’s fearful timidity. It’s a fear to ever try because, “what if I don’t do it right?”

It’s not what God intended.

The Urgent Need to Stop Judging Others… Not What You Think…

Love others. (John 13:34) Exhort them to do good works. (Hebrews 10:24) Encourage them to submit & surrender more & more of themselves & their lives to live to honor & please God with all of them.

But please… stop judging.

Shine HOPE by praying for the people in your life you feel concerned for, by addressing direct SIN or sinful ATTITUDES you plainly see, by not being the Holy Spirit for anyone in your life—He is GOD ALMIGHTY… & Jesus paid for it already anyway, so you worry about you & go to God with it, making sure YOUR heart is right before God in your advice to & attitude toward others. And stop beating yourself up for what Jesus already paid for. Fail forward.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement right here on my blog/website @ www.MichelleHydeOnline.com.

Share with friends & family… & SUBSCRIBE by “Joining My Tribe,” so you never miss a week!

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

A Note from Michelle:

(***Check out my FREE Journal Printable Resources: “Accountability Partner Guide + Question Prompts” & “Bible Study Question Prompts ,” as well as “Prayers of Surrender” prayer guides!***)

This blog/website has been running for over 5.5 years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” tab. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” tab, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox (make sure to check your other inbox folders), along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Consider these pieces when shopping for friends, family, or yourself. Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

June 2024 Hope Mail (PHILIPPINES & INDIA)

Trades of Hope, June 2024 Hope Mail, India, Philippines, The Urgent Need to Stop Judging Others... Not What You Think...
(Shown: June 2024 Hope Mail, handcrafted in India & the Philippines. Every purchase empowers women in these areas out of poverty! Purchase now to support them!)

FOR A LIMITED TIME – Only available during the month of June!

This exclusive June Hope Mail package makes a great gift for any occasion! Receive free shipping on this June Hope Mail package that includes our Moonlit Capiz Earrings from the Philippines, Basil Honeycomb Soap from India, and an adorable Honey Sticker mailed in a stylish Fashion as a Force for Good envelope.

How You Can Help the Artisans & Support My Website:

#1 is PRAY. Financial help is great & helps pay my website fees & helps support these women artisans… but God’s help is always needed most… both for encouragement & for spiritual hope, through Jesus, for the women we support through our ethical fashion purchases. Always PRAY first.

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me in continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win-win-win!

Love ya lots! Have a wonderful week!

Flushing Bad Habits, God-Centered Perspective Shifts, Intentional Growth, Living Your Faith, Salvation & Grace

Fixing My Focus

May 27, 2024by Michelle Hyde1 Comment

My Heart Has Gotten Colder

My husband & I have started trying to pray together before bed so we can share whatever may be on our heart/mind with each other & with God.

As we were praying, I just realized that my main prayer was for my lukewarm heart. I have talked the last couple weeks in my blog about people-pleasing & living in constant need of approval even in how I worship or anything. How it has dimmed my light—taking my focus off pleasing & honoring God as my main focus & instead putting too much stock in whether or not I am pleasing enough to everyone around me.

Well, you may already be aware of this, but the truth is—it is always impossible to please everyone. And in trying to do so anyway, you must water down yourself to be more palatable to more people.

And that’s what I have done. Watered myself down. I stopped drawing & dancing & singing & enjoying the little daily blessings from God all around me because I was too afraid of not doing something well enough.

It’s Okay to be a Work-in-Progress

Hearing “The Magical Yet” read last year sparked this realization first in my heart. I had begun to be too afraid to ever try, to ever do… because what if I am not good enough at it?

I have even projected this feeling to God, as if I am never good enough for Him either & have just sort of walled myself off from feeling passionate about Him even for fear of “doing it wrong.” As if He is also constantly disapproving of my constant inadequacies.

But He knows I am inadequate. He knows I am not enough. That is the very reason He sent Jesus to die. To rise again. (Isaiah 53:5) That is the very reason He says I need to abide in Him & Him in me. (John 15:5) I need Him.

Don’t be Afraid of Your Need to Grow

I need to retrain my focus. I need to let go of fears of insufficiencies holding chains over me from progress & joy. I need to let myself try, fail, do, sing, enjoy the blessings of God around me every day, living a life of praise & not fear.

Not to live my life my way or do whatever I wish, but to stop worrying so much about whether everyone else is praising me or criticizing me over every little detail of my life. As long as I live according to how God says & walk obediently to Him first, naysayers can be naysayers.

That is where I begin again. With my eyes fixed on Him.

Only His Opinion Matters When Others Disagree

Imagine if Jesus’ disciples, or if the authors of the Bible (inspired by God) were to stop worshipping or living according to God’s direction because other people didn’t approve of it always all the time?

What if Jesus had just stepped down & said, “Oh, okay, sorry everyone! I won’t bother you anymore with the truth that is upsetting you so much.”

Jesus was HATED by church leaders even.

Don’t Go Hating on Church Leaders

Now, in their case, they had grown so accustomed to all of their rules upon rules & their way of doing things, that when Jesus challenged them on it, they hated Him for it. They hated Him for challenging their spiritual authority. They hated Him for challenging their role as leadership–their power.

They needed a lesson in humility, didn’t they? In finding their hope in Jesus Christ & not in themselves.

They had felt satisfied that “as long as we do such & such or avoid such & such, we are good!” But Jesus challenged them with the fact that even their THOUGHTS mattered to God. Even their MOTIVATIONS in their actions mattered. (Matthew 5:17-6:15)

Not just checking off the right “Christian-y” things to be a “good” person.

God cares about the HEART.

But, all this to say—the leaders convinced themselves they meant well, but they were missing the whole point.

Well-Meaning Is Not Always the Same Thing as God’s Will

Then there were even the fellow Christians. They were obeying truth & cherishing & surrendering to Christ—but it was still easy to think on human terms & to judge a situation based on what made logical sense to them.

Like, when Paul said he was going to return somewhere where the people there had already made it clear they were out for his blood for the things he was saying—speaking truth & the hope found in Jesus Christ alone….

And, like anyone who loves & cares deeply for someone, all the fellow Christians could think & say was: “You CAN’T go THERE!! They will KILL you!”

His response? “What are you doing, weeping & breaking my heart? For I am ready not only to be imprisoned but even to die in Jerusalem for the name of the Lord Jesus.” (Acts 21:11-14)

Even Christians Get It Wrong Sometimes

Paul’s well-meaning Christian friends were focused on earthly things—the safety & security of their friend—wonderful things to care about when it comes to the life of someone you care about… instead of focusing on the eternal—that even IF he died, if God WAS leading Him, then God had more than a good enough reason, & that “even ‘til death” was MORE than WORTH it.

He understood that death was a small price when considering sharing the hope we have because of Jesus Christ—he was eternity-focused.

His friends weren’t being evil for caring for his well-being, but they could have kept him from obedience to God’s leading if he had tried to please them above pleasing God.

We’re All Human… But We All Need Each Other

Now, we have to be careful talking about misguided church leaders & well-meaning but misguided church-goers, because the Bible is very clear that we need to be plugged into a church. (Colossians 3:13; Hebrews 10:24-25; 1 Timothy 3:15) We need fellowship. We need the coming together. We need a shepherding pastor looking out for our spiritual well-being & growth. (Acts 20:28; 1 Thessalonians 5:12-13; Hebrews 13:17)

But they are all people, just like me. And while much can be gained in sharpening one another (Proverbs 27:17) & edifying (building up) & encouraging (lifting up) of one another (1 Thessalonians 5:11)… when their opinions begin to trump obedience to God’s leading, it becomes a problem… a big problem.

I need to learn to separate the two.

They are all supplemental to all I get from abiding in Him & letting Him lead my life. They are not the main thing.

Everyone Will Always Have an Opinion to Share, but be Right Before the Lord & Let the Rest GO

I think about David. He was so overcome with joy & praise & awe & wonder & worship that he was dancing his heart out so much so that his wife chided him for embarrassing her in front of her maidens. (2 Samuel 6:14-23)

But his response was beautiful because he said he should have danced even more wildly as an outpouring of praise.

If I am truly living to please & honor Him with everything I do in my life, I don’t need to be worried about how everyone else might turn their nose up at me or roll their eyes or raise their eyebrows in judgement.

I just need to worry about pleasing & honoring God in my response to Him & His lead.

Sometimes It’s Just NOT Your Business–If It’s Not Direct Sin, It’s Between Them & the LORD

The Bible addresses judgement in several ways. One of which is: “who are you to judge your neighbor?” which is not saying to not point out sin… it is saying. for one: don’t be self-righteous in judging someone else & how they worship because it doesn’t look like how you do it or how your church did it growing up. (James 4:12)

Don’t think, “oh, they listen to worship music other than HYMNS? Can they even CALL that WORSHIP music?!” or “They raise their hands in church? What, do they think that makes them extra spiritual or something, lol?”

Stop doing that. If you’re concerned that SIN is involved, try PRAYING for God to reveal that to them & give them discernment rather than being a busy-body judging every person’s intent by their actions which you may not understand or relate to.

And get this—even if they ARE doing it with wrong intent, which you cannot possibly know unless you know how to read minds—it should NOT affect whether or not YOU worship. You focus on YOU.

Fixing My Focus

I have let all of everyone’s opinions shape me. Even if they weren’t even intending to do that to me…. I need to be fixing my focus.

I let the turned-up noses, raised eyebrows, & rolled eyes shape how I worship God.

I let the well-meaning opinions of others sway how I handle situations versus keeping my eyes eternity-fixed.

I let the customs of certain church bodies guide me versus looking to God as my guide & unwavering standard, & rather than understanding every group of people is going to do things a little differently, but that doesn’t make it “more right” than the way another church may do things—unless one is acting contrary to God’s Word.

I need to stop judging. I need to stop being so concerned with being judged.

Eyes fixed on Him.

That is where I begin again. With my eyes fixed on Him.

Turning Back to the Heart of Worship… Where It’s All about HIM

Who are you trying to impress? Who are you looking around to see if you’re “doing it right”? Who is your standard?

Are you getting to know Him & what pleases & honors Him through the Bible & prayer with Him? Are you bowing to Him alone? Are you looking to Him for approval? Or to the crowds, your church, your family, Christian leaders, authors, speakers? Who are you seeking to please? Him? Or others?

Where is your focus?

Shine HOPE by LETTING GO of the chains of everyone else’s expectations & opinions & well-meaning contradictions to eternity-focus…. By letting God be your guide in all, with your eyes fixed on HIM as the One to please above all else.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement right here on my blog/website @ www.MichelleHydeOnline.com.

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As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

A Note from Michelle:

(***Check out my FREE Journal Printable Resources: “Accountability Partner Guide + Question Prompts” & “Bible Study Question Prompts ,” as well as “Prayers of Surrender” prayer guides!***)

This blog/website has been running for over 5.5 years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” tab. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” tab, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

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Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Consider these pieces when shopping for friends, family, or yourself. Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Indian Rose Bracelet (INDIA)

Trades of Hope, Indian Rose Bracelet, India, Fixing My Focus
(Shown: Indian Rose Bracelet, handmade in India. Every purchase of this bracelet empowers women out of poverty! Buy one today!)

This exquisite, beaded bracelet is a testament to the skilled craftsmanship of women in India, who meticulously handcrafted it using radiant pink jasper beads and delicately incorporated gold accent beads featured throughout the design. The Indian Rose Bracelet is beautiful while creating dignified, necessary jobs for women in areas of extreme poverty of India. In an area where vulnerable women are often exploited by sweatshops, the women in this Artisan community can work in a safe environment.

***Purchase this beautiful bracelet to support empowering women in India out of poverty!***

How You Can Help the Artisans & Support My Website:

#1 is PRAY. Financial help is great & helps pay my website fees & helps support these women artisans… but God’s help is always needed most… both for encouragement & for spiritual hope, through Jesus, for the women we support through our ethical fashion purchases. Always PRAY first.

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me in continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win-win-win!

Love ya lots! Have a wonderful week!

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Bible Verse of the Day

It was not by their sword that they won the land, nor did their arm bring them victory; it was your right hand, your arm, and the light of your face, for you loved them.
Psalm 44:3
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“I help women Find Hope & Shine like they were always meant to. Let's do this journey together.”

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More Encouragement Here:

Do You Ever Feel Invisible?

Do You Ever Feel Invisible?

December 1, 2025
Living in Light of Eternity? Or Just Right Now?

Living in Light of Eternity? Or Just Rig

November 24, 2025
To 42 Years, & Counting

To 42 Years, & Counting

November 17, 2025
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