Doubts, So Many Doubts

If you have read my testimony, you have seen that my life was once defined by insufferable doubts for most of my growing up years. (Read my testimony HERE.)

I hated the tossing & turning that the doubts invoked, but I didn’t know how to find the calm amidst my slew of unanswered questions.

Saved Young, But Then…

You see, I accepted Jesus as my Redeemer & Savior when I was very young, but then the doubts of the world threatened me at every turn, & they seemed to multiply with each passing year.

I didn’t know how to quiet the questions.

I wished for childlike faith, an innocence that could easily believe.

I wished that I could turn off the doubts & live in peaceful assurance.

I wished that I didn’t feel the need to know & that I could just move on with life.

But I couldn’t figure out how.

More Friends… More Doubts

With every new friend came new opinions about religions & “gods”. Every person seemed to have their own opinions about “truth”.

But if they were all true, then none of them were true.

How could one “god” be right to one person & another be right for another person? Wouldn’t that imply that both are imagined & made up by the believer or group of believers?

It didn’t make sense to me.

So who was right?

Every Answer Stirred More Questions

No matter how many questions I asked, with every answer or explanation I was given, I was met with the exact same personal conclusion, “but they’re human… & “to err is human.”

So, whose opinion could I really trust? Which one was true? Who determined which one was true? How could anyone ever really know?

And so, because I could not trust every opinion I was given & because I didn’t know whose opinion I COULD trust, I was always brought back to square one, in my tangled mess of doubts.

Relatable?

At this point, you may be relating to me. Maybe you have wondered the same things.

Maybe you avoid asking those questions because you don’t know their answers.

Maybe you avoid acknowledging those questions exist because you’re afraid of what that means about whether your salvation is genuine (for those who have already accepted Christ).

Maybe you are intent on or content with believing your own opinions, whether they are true or not.

But, although I personally struggled through each of those “maybe” scenarios, I could not keep those questions from wanting to burst out of me.

Truth I Could Live For

I had to know the TRUTH.

Not what others WANT me to believe. Not just what others WANT to believe themselves. I wanted the TRUTH.

If God was real, I had to make a decision whether to reject or accept Him.

If He wasn’t real, I wanted to know so that I could live however I wanted, without unnecessary guilt of not following the 10 Commandments from the Bible.

But How Do You Really KNOW?

But, as I mentioned above, every answer I sought after left me right back where I started, because every answer I received stemmed from human understanding, human wisdom, &/or human knowledge.

And anything from us as humans is vulnerable to mistakes & misunderstandings & circulating misinformation.

I needed more.

Case for Christ

If you have ever watched Case for Christ, a movie that came out in 2017, it will greatly help you understand both my doubting & how I found my answer.

Case for Christ is a movie based on the true story of former atheist Lee Strobel. When his wife becomes a Christian, it sends his world in an upheaval & he embarks on a mission to use his research journalistic skills to disprove Christ.

I may not have done the extensive research that Lee Strobel did, , but my doubts weighed just as heavily, & like his experience, no proof seemed sufficient.

In the movie, there is a scene where he is pushing his wife to tell him why she would believe something he can’t prove (even though all of the professional sources he sought implied that all evidence pointed to a supreme being in existence).

Her answer was my answer & it can be paraphrased as something like this, “because He feels more real than anything I have felt in my life.”

Forever Searching… Or, Ask God for Truth

You see, I could search for proof my whole life, but it all comes down to this, will I let myself have faith?

Faith is not easy, but it doesn’t rest in having to know the answer to everything. It comes down to admitting we can’t & that God is more real than anything we can feel in this life.

If you struggle with this, take a moment to consider this: Are you willing to submit to the truth when you find it? Or are you avoiding truth, just looking for an excuse to live your way, just without consequences?

We can all admit that there are consequences to the choices we make. We live in a broken, fallen world, plagued by sin & self-led choices.

But God offers hope because He tells us the truth. It’s not up to us. It’s Him. So, submit your life to Him & let HIM show you the truth you seek.

“Lord, I Believe. Help My Unbelief!”

Be willing to pray the doubter’s prayer, “Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief.”

If you REALLY want the truth, ASK Him to show you. Stop letting your doubts torment you & finally find stability in the truth.

It can sound something like this:

“God, I am so exhausted from doubting everything about life! How can I know what is real? How do I base my life on what I don’t understand or don’t know is positively true? Help me to see the truth. If you are who You say You are, then You alone can shine straight through to the core of my doubting & shine a light of truth into it. Stabilize me & show me what to believe. I don’t want to base my life on a lie, but I don’t want to face the consequences of an ignored or avoided or misunderstood truth. So, please help me. Show me the way to truth. Lord, somehow I believe, but help my unbelief. AMEN.”

Keep Asking… He Hears You & He WILL Answer You If You Seek Earnestly

I prayed something similar for many years, not willing to give up & surrender to the great waves of doubt that tossed me to & fro in life. I wanted to feel grounded & secure. I wanted to build my life on truth, not opinion or fantasy.

Will you take that journey? Have you already come out the other side?

I no longer have those doubts, because He has cut through them to show me Himself. He knew exactly what I needed because He is GOD.

Keep seeking His face, for He knows just what you need. And once you find the truth in Him, you will see that He feels more real than anything real that you have ever felt tasted, seen, heard, or smelled…

& that’s how I know He is THE truth.

Shine Hope, Lovely… By seeking HIM.

Coming Next Week

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A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

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Artisan Information:

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