The vast expanse of subtle, rolling hills sprawled across the countryside, covered in a field of lush moss green & sprinkled with specks of white, bright yellow, & pale lavender wildflowers.

A worn dirt trail was woven through the hills like a slithering brown snake, leading into the shadows beyond the horizon.

And a wisp.

A wisp of soft yellow light played amongst the wildflowers, dancing with the charms of the wind & blending with the fireflies at dusk.

No one from the nearby village knew where the wisp had come from, but most everyone enjoyed the whimsical imagination that it sparked in their hearts as they surmised its tale.

Maybe it was a wish prancing among them, willing to grant the greatest desire of the one who would capture it.

Maybe it was a truly rare, tiny creature of light, the only of its kind.

Maybe it was a tiny guardian, charged by some unknown force to watch over them.

Maybe it was dangerous, as the unexplainable sometimes is.

Or maybe it was just a wisp who liked to dance with the wind & play amongst the wildflowers, blending in with the fireflies at dusk.

No one quite knew for sure.

Some children would chase it, laughing gleefully, trying to be the first to capture it.

Some mothers would drag their children away, worried of the unknown & yet some mothers would simply smile warmly, enjoying the scene of whimsical joy before them.

The fathers didn’t know what to make of the single wisp & so they showed cautionary acceptance of the it living amongst them.

Some villagers would try to study the wisp, others would avoid it, & yet others still would dream of the fairytales it sparked in their minds.

But, one day, the wisp changed.

Its yellowy light shifted to a hazy, bluish purple.

It no longer seemed interested in dancing amongst the wildflowers of the rolling green hills.

The wisp took singular notice of the snakelike trail & began to flit & flutter along its dusty path, seemingly oblivious to the curious & cautious stares of the onlooking villagers.

On it went, its faint glow disappearing from view as it followed its course.

And the wisp continued on, a singular mission seemed to drive it forward.

As it floated along, swimming through the air like a lazy hummingbird, it reached a divide in the path ahead.

One led to a dark, shadowy wood.

The other led to a path of hard, bright sunshine & rocky terrain.

Which way will the wisp travel?

Where is it headed? And from where did it come?

The wisp paused just briefly, as if to consider its decision.

And then it quickly disappeared into the dark wood, its light illuminating everything the darkness touched.

(That’s the funny thing about light. It only seems to brighten as its surroundings grow darker.)

And on it went, deeper into the less dark woods, until it came upon a small clearing with an even smaller fawn laying in the grass.

The wisp began to brighten as it approached the young creature who seemed lost & alone in the dark of the forest.

Warmth began to emanate from the small wisp as it seemed to comfort the tiny animal.

Gaining courage, the fawn wobbled to his feet & came closer to the little glowing light that was new to the darkness of its surroundings.

And as the fawn closed in, the wisp flitted onward, seeming to lead the frightened young thing deeper into the dense trees.

And there it was ahead, a ray of light… & then two & three.

The break in the trees was just ahead, with the sounds of leaves being gently crushed in the shadows in front of them.

A silhouette of a doe appeared near the end of the wood & the crunching leaves grew louder as the mother deer rushed with worried excitement to its young son who had lost himself in the depth of the deep, dark wood.

Reunited at last, the mother & son nuzzled each other, now oblivious to the presence of the tiny little floating wisp.

And as they cleared the wood, heading for safer ground, the little wisp had completed its mission, now wandering on to shine light where it was needed next, wherever that may be.

Coming Next Week

I hope you enjoyed this month’s Special Feature post!

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement, & to follow along on my journey through the major pivotal moments that helped shape my faith & helped me trust God more & more.

Share with friends & Subscribe by “Joining My Tribe,” so you never miss a week!

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Manilla Bay Earrings

Local capiz shell is dyed a light blue/green hue & hand cut into half moon shapes accented with silver toned metal.

Artisan Information:

In the Philippines, finding employment as a woman in poverty can be extremely difficult. Poor working conditions, lack of job security, & unfair pay are often the realities. Through your purchase, these women are receiving an income, health care, & social development programs. This allows these women to realize their potential & pursue their dreams in a safe environment. You have the opportunity to change lives! 

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Ducking underneath the low hanging vines, she stepped through the dark woods. Her senses were alert, taking in the sounds around her. Above her, the deep green leaves rustled in the wind. Around her were the sounds of the forest, the bustling of the scurrying critters, aware & nervous of her presence.

And behind her, she heard a branch crunched underfoot.

It wouldn’t be long now before she was caught, but she was determined to venture further into the mysterious darkness surrounding her.

Sunlight snuck through between branches, dancing on the dark stumps, soft moss, & green grass of the forest floor around her. The darkness seemed to dodge each sunbeam, but the light persisted, shining brightly through the shadows.

Another branch crunched behind her.

She edged forward, taking in the smells of the woods. The fresh air was intoxicating as she breathed deeply, relishing in the fresh scent of nature.

She reached out her arms as she strolled, allowing her fingertips to brush gently against the leaves & floral plants along her self-made path.

She could feel the soft earth beneath the thin soles of her sandals.

Everything seemed right to her, & yet, something was not quite right.

Something was off about this place. As much as she tried to embrace this dark forest of a home, she felt that she never belonged here–that she was never meant to be here.

Something always lurked in the shadows.

She was getting closer now, she could feel it. The air seemed fresher & the beauty surrounding her seemed to grow richer the closer she came.

Very soon now, she would arrive at her determined destination. She would finally be free of the darkness that followed her every step.

Another crunch behind her.

“You can’t run forever,” a deep voice spoke up from the dark.

“I can’t stay here forever either,” she whispered in return, unsure of whether she was even heard.

Undeterred, she continued to step forward, bold in her determination to finally break into the light.

She had grown so accustomed to the dark woods. As foreboding & dim as it was, it was all she ever knew.

Every rock & stump & creek & shadow were all familiar to her. It was her home.

But she also knew that it was a lie. It was something she settled for, not wanting to risk believing the tales of the bright place beyond her dark home.

Why give up everything she has ever known for a tale of something that could be merely a myth? Because somehow this “myth” seemed to beckon to her, calling her by name, lovingly inviting her to see for herself.

She couldn’t see it, but she could feel it. It was more real than anything she had ever physically seen or felt in her dark woods.

But her doubts kept her back for so long, asking her why she would risk trusting in something that she could not see for herself?

Despite her trepidation, she had realized that her thirst for something more than this dark forest beckoned her beyond her ability to deter or ignore it.

She wanted to believe there was more. She wanted to believe that there was something greater than this darkness she had come to accept.

 “It’s not worth it. You won’t be free anymore. Come back with me.” The deep voice stirred up doubts in her heart. She hesitated, halted in the midst of the forest life around her.

“I can’t,” she determined. “I can’t be content to stay trapped here. Something is missing & I want to know what it is. I want more.”

“You will regret it. There are rules. Here, you are free. Come back with me….” As she glanced back, a hand reached from the shadows & eyes gleamed in the darkness.

Something menacing crept through the calm look in those gleaming eyes.

“I… I won’t. Those rules others spoke of… they seem to be right somehow. And I am not free here. It is darkness. It is suffocating. Something is missing. I must know what it is.” She stammered, but as she spoke, courage seemed to bubble up within her, emboldening her to keep forward.

“I have to know the truth,” she determined, turning away from the voice.

A mingling of fear mixed with her newfound courage. Those gleaming eyes she had once accepted now left her feeling unsettled. Something about them sent chills up her spine. She wanted to get away from them.

Stepping more quickly, she decided that nothing would hold her back anymore. She wanted to see the light shine freely. She wanted to feel safe & secure. She wanted freedom from the darkness that encapsulated her life.

She didn’t know if she was somehow too late. She didn’t know if she would be counted worthy to leave the darkness & enter into the light, but she had to at least try.

This place she had come to love & accept seemed but a shadow of what called to her heart. She had to know & see it for herself.

The calm, deep voice seemed to morph in the shadows, an underlying threat seeming to cut into the words, “Come back now. You won’t like it there. It’s better here. Don’t hope for more. What more could you want than doing whatever it is you wish? This is the place you need to be. Stay here!”

Chills danced nervously on her skin as she pushed forward. She no longer had the nerve to look behind her. The voice had always seemed to placate her into never seeking out something better. But now, it seemed to threaten her, demanding that she not break free.

She broke into a run & then she stopped in her tracks when she saw it… Light breaking through the trees & a gentle looking man, made all of light, with arms outstretched & a wide, warm smile welcoming her approach.

All at once, something inside of her changed. She felt securely loved & cherished & protected & cared for & brave & strong & free & FORGIVEN.

Looking into His eyes broke chains that had been clinging to her-chains she had denied were even there. Fear & regret & shame seemed to melt into the ground beneath her with every step closer.

She no longer doubted.

The voice behind her sounded desperate now. “No! Stay here! It’s better here! You can do whatever you want! There are no rules! Don’t go there! I WANT CONTROL OF YOU!”

She broke into a sprint, straight toward this man she had never met & yet felt like someone she had known all her life.

He saw through her, every crack & every mistake. She could feel it. He KNEW her, even her worst!

And yet… warmth. Love… Grace.

As she reached Him, she fell to her knees, tears streaming down her dirtied cheeks, too overwhelmed by emotion to meet His eyes.

She was too unworthy. She wasn’t enough. She didn’t deserve this kindness.

And yet…

“My darling one, do not be afraid. You have been forgiven. My grace has covered you. You are free now.” His voice was sincere, gentle & kind. “Come to me, my daughter. I love you as you are. Welcome home.”

Her face tilted upwards, hesitant & humbled. Her eyes were red & & her cheeks tear-stained.

But something wonderful donned on her in that moment when her eyes met His.

She felt light. She felt… free.

She slowly, carefully rose to her feet, not taking her eyes from the gentle eyes that stared back.

Questions danced in her eyes, wondering if this could all be real… If she could really feel this secure & loved & forgiven & FREE… If she could really be accepted by Someone as kind & gracious & wonderful as He.

With knowing eyes, He nodded in affirmation, understanding her hesitation, & a genuine smile spread across His face, His arms still open wide.

“Welcome home, darling one,” He said as He spread His arms even wider, beckoning her into His welcoming embrace.

This time, she didn’t even pause before closing the distance into the best hug she had ever known… one that seemed to erase in an instant every heartache she had carried throughout her entire lifetime.

She was FINALLY home & she never wanted to go back to the darkness that was once her life.

*****************

After that day, she quickly realized that life still had its complications & she still made mistakes on a regular basis. But something was different now. It was as if she was being changed from the inside out. The more she got to know the Man who welcomed her into light, the more her heart seemed to grow in wisdom, strength, & peace.

She could feel His strength working through her. His courage replaced her fears when faced with difficult circumstances as she learned to trust Him through each storm.

She now could ask Him for wisdom in any situation, no longer relying on the limitations of her own understanding.

And she knew grace as a way of life. His grace seemed to flow through EVERYTHING.

She no longer lived each day trying to survive the dark world she once called home.

He lit her path. He guided her steps. He cared for her & loved her & cherished her soul.

His grace flowed through it all, allowing her freedom she had never known before.

And never came a day where she regretted leaving the darkness of the forest she had once called home because now she knew the stories were true.

The Bright Place was not actually a destination to arrive at, but a Someone to love her unconditionally… A Someone who gave of His own life to cover her wrongs… A Someone who conquered death & sits on the right hand of God’s throne. A Someone more wonderful & powerful & gracious than any she had ever known.

A Someone named Jesus.

And now, instead of living in the darkness… She lived in GRACE.

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Holly Necklace

Co-Founder of Trades of Hope, Holly’s, passion is to empower women to be all God created them to be & to live out their potential. Whether she is visiting the brothels of Asia or in hometown USA, her desire is to see women live out their calling with pride & dignity. This piece is a reflection of the pride & skills a woman rescued from the brothels has when given the opportunity. A delicate piece, this golden/pink druzy necklace sparkles in the light.

Artisan Information:

In Asia, poverty leads many women to be sexually exploited in brothels. These women want to provide for their families but have so few options. But through your purchase, women are being rescued from these brothels & rehabilitated. Holistic care is given to these women, including a shelter, job training, healthcare, counseling, & educational grants for themselves & their children. You can help these women experience restoration for their future!

Purchase this piece & empower a woman in Asia!

(*Also Pictured: Lagoon Studs, empowering women out of poverty in India!)

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Gazing out the dusty window, she watched as the wind danced with the strands of tall grass in the field beyond her small home. The sway & the tease of the wind swirling through & round & back again, in an elegant dance of wistful joy, made her heart feel calm.

She imagined a deep ocean, where the surface seemed to ebb & flow as one body. To her, fields of grass always resembled oceans when the wind blew through them.

The sunshine only made her view better, as it gave the appearance of glitter sprinkled on the grassy field, welling up a sense of hope & wonder & playfulness as the light spotlighted the dance between the wind & grass.

The room where she sat was dimly lit & dusty, a faint smell of mildew hung in the air around her. The tension of responsibility loomed, as the bustle of morning activities went on in the rooms beneath her. Her parents & older siblings were engrossed in the chores for the day, seemingly unaware of the wonder beyond her window.

The window was her escape. The window was her portal to a world of imagination & wonder.

From her view out of this small round window in the attic, she could see the vast dancing field in front of her, the tall line of tress beyond it, & she could only but picture in her mind the magical secret that she kept hidden from the world, hiding behind that line of tall trees, seemingly untouched & unnoticed by the rest of the world around her.

She would go to venture out there today.

She felt drawn to its mystery & curiosities.

Her life needed a sprinkle of wonder & awe today.

But first, she pulled on some clothes fit for an adventure, which to her meant a billowy pastel purple gown & a halo of spring flowers atop her curls. Shoes were optional for adventures, in her humble opinion.

So, as she stepped barefoot down the stairs & down the hall, & as her parents & older siblings hustled about in the constant fray of responsibilities & stresses for their day, she slipped out the door unnoticed & snuck out to that dancing field of grass, where she made no delay in sprinting through the soft grass that tickled her toes.

Carefree & eager to visit her mysterious discovery once more, her heart swelled as she excitedly reached the line of trees that kept her mystery hidden from those around her home.

This was it. This was her moment to step into the wonder once more.

Hesitating momentarily, she mused over the thought that every visit to this mysterious place left her wondering why no one else seemed to notice it or to even venture past this line of trees that now loomed curiously above her.

She took a deep breath to steady her excited nerves as she stepped into the shadows, where only a short walk through the dark wall of trees led her to a bright clearing.

Here, she could see it… the most beautiful place she could imagine ever seeing in her entire life.

Ahead of her spread out a vast field of simple, small flowers, as far as the eye could see. The flat earth before her was lush & green & speckled with delicate blooms.

And there, in the center of the field, afar off, was the curious wonder that always forced a moment of pause, as wonder & awe & curiosity filled her small heart.

The tree.

But not just any tree. This tree twisted & turned, its branches stretched out wide & yet curled in a fanciful twist of intertwining patterns. It looked like something out of a fairytale… or a painting… or pure imagination.

It was unreal. It was fanciful. It was amazing!

She stared in awe… her eyes sparkled as she soaked up the view & all at once felt drawn to race toward the tree, excited to visit her small, mysterious hideaway from the world.

As she drew nearer, she could only manage a slow advance, too intrigued & inspired by its wonder to rush.

Now in the center of the flowery field, she looked up & let the magic of the moment swirl around her, the breezes playing with her hair & refreshing her entirely.

Her small hands reached up. She let her small fingers graze gingerly along the rough surface of the tree bark, that somehow felt like rough velvet.

And as she glanced upward, she could see the small opening in the branches that led to her own private hideaway.

Impatient to wait a moment longer, she took hold of a low branch as she steadied her barefoot feet on the trunk, preparing to make the short climb toward the opening that glittered & sparkled from where she stood.

Ducking into the hole, it seemed even brighter inside, within the dense weave of branches.

Little drops of dew were suspended in the air, floating above her head like tiny bulbs of glowing light.

Fanciful trinkets from unknown origins were set around the inside, each in varying pastel colors of intricate design.

She crawled in further & sat cross-legged once inside, distracted once more by the wonder & amazement that flooded her heart. Whenever she visited this tree, she always felt like all of her troubles seemed to vanish.

She felt safe & full of hope & joy.

She knew, while in this tree, that things were going to get better.

She knew that this moment of wonder could overshadow any fear or dreariness that threatened her heart.
Inside this tree, full of enchanting wonder, she could relax & just enjoy the moment of peace that seemed to encapsulate her world, in its presence.

She only hoped that she could learn how to bring this same feeling of refreshment & joy & wonder to her family & to the world she encountered along the way of life.

As the scenery began to drift away, she awoke in bed as an adult… remembering fondly the dream that had graced itself upon her mind while in restful sleep.

She wiped the sleep from her eyes, smiled from the memory of that fanciful dream, & rolled over, pulling the comforter toward her chin, wishing for that wonderful dream to whisk her away once more.

Coming Next Week

Check back on Monday morning EST for some more regularly scheduled encouragement & I hope you enjoyed this month’s special feature post, shared every last Thursday of the month!

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I will feature an item that is changing lives. These pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Truth Earrings

These incredibly light earrings are made with genuine local capiz shell.

Artisan Information:

In the Philippines, finding employment as a woman in poverty can be extremely difficult. Poor working conditions, lack of job security, & unfair pay are often the realities. Through your purchase, these women are receiving an income, health care, & social development programs. This allows these women to realize their potential & pursue their dreams in a safe environment. You have the opportunity to change lives!

Purchase this piece & empower a woman in the Philippines!

Shop Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

(To read or re-read Part 1 of this story before continuing on, please check it out, here.)

…

She stared wide-eyed at her computer screen long after he signed off, her jaw dropped & her face flushed with shock.

What just happened…?

***********************

The next day was dawning & the remembrance of her looming plans rushed back into her mind as she groggily awoke from a restless night of sleep.

Maybe if she didn’t tell anyone about the date, she could just go out, come back afterwards, & then just move on with her life.

She had already decided that she wasn’t going to do anything differently with this boy. She was going to be herself & nothing more. If she didn’t find him funny, she would not giggle politely to humor him. If he says anything she didn’t agree with, she would let him know flat out. No pretending. No faking. If he didn’t like her as is, then he could move on all the sooner & so could she.

The impending doom… er, date… was coming up & she was spending her day trying to put it from her mind. She was well aware of the fact that she hadn’t given him her phone number & that if he got lost & wanted to call for better directions, oh well.

She also knew how mean that sounded. It’s not that she wanted to be mean to this guy… she just really didn’t want to end up crushing his heart like she seemed to already have been so good at doing with other guys. She wanted to spare herself the drama & the pain that seemed to inevitably accompany her dating efforts.

Better to end it now, rather than draw it out, establish feelings, & then rip out both of their hearts. It was actually the merciful thing, although seemingly harsh in the moment.

As the day went on, she eventually started preparing for her date. She wanted to dress confidently, to hopefully feel the confidence she aimed to project. Her nerves seemed to be bouncing off every wall she passed throughout the day & although her face showed calm composure, she couldn’t deny the rate at which her heart was beating. First dates are awkward & she was not looking forward to this one.

Although, in the back of her mind, she had to admit a flicker of excitement & even the truth of feeling flattered.

***********************

The evening arrived in a blur of a day. Her mom had insisted upon meeting him (completely breaking the code of not meeting the parents until you were getting serious in your relationship). At least this could only act as an extra deterrent, so she should have been more willing to oblige, but embarrassment won that round instead.

Heading out the door, as he opened the passenger door for her, she stepped into the car & a magical thing happened—ease & calm swept over her heart as she slid into the seat. She felt somehow like she had been in this seat a million times before & it somehow felt natural to be sitting in it right then.

The movie was pleasant & dinner was delicious, but conversation was exceptionally surprising. They laughed (genuinely), talked about life (no fluff, just real, honest talk), & they felt like long-lost friends reunited. It was surprising & yet, familiar.

As the evening concluded, they said their goodbyes & picked up their conversation through messages online later that night.

That’s when the problem occurred.

As they chatted, he shared with her how he had been feeling God leading him to this point & nudging him to ask her out. He had resisted, recovering from his own painful romantic memories, but had felt God saying, “will you do this in My timing, or yours?” And that’s when he gave in & went for it by asking her out.

Needless to say, telling a skittish, commitment-phobe girl that “God was telling you to push forward with dating her because God wanted you to pursue her” was basically like telling her to RUN! Not the smartest move on his part, probably.

And so, in response to his bold proclamation, she went on auto-pilot & proceeded to dump her entire relationship history on him as a defense mechanism. She shared everything. Ev-er-y-thing.

While spilling her every heartache onto the unsuspecting victim of her outburst, she cried & wanted to scream at him. She was so freaked out about potentially hurting him or getting herself heartbroken yet again. She was mad at him for being so bold when she had barely agreed to this one date. She was mad that she was finally satisfied with singleness, had learned to avoid flirtations & relying on men for affirmation & now this! She was mad that he had ruined their awesome night of relaxed jollity with bold statements of pursuing her romantically.

And so, she dumped all of her heartache on his shoulders.

He didn’t run. He didn’t defend himself. He just listened patiently, feeling the hurt in her words.

Once the panic & outpouring of her past heartache began to subside, in one final effort to protect the both of them from experiencing similar fates, she asked him to make a vow to her.

The vow was this, “Do not ask me out or talk about a relationship with me for three months. Three months. Pray. Just pray. Ask God to help you get over your twitterpated feelings so that you can see God’s will above your own will. And I will pray that God help me see past my fears to understand His will. Three months & no sooner. Just pray about it.”

He agreed & they said their goodbyes for the evening.

After they signed off their message chat, she cried. She felt ashamed for dumping her past on this unsuspecting guy. She felt ashamed for not trusting God when faced with something that scared her. She felt scared for the potential damage she could cause him. She wanted to run away.

And as she cried, she prayed something quite differently than what she had just said to that young man who had stirred all of these emotions & all of this fear. She asked God to make His will clear to her above all else. She no longer wanted to date for “fun” or “attention” or “fulfillment”. She only wanted to be with someone if the relationship honored God & if it was His best for her. She wanted to rest in the security of Christ’s embrace versus relying on the embrace of a man to fulfill her.

She wanted God’s will.

And so, she prayed this, “God, I don’t know what to do. I am so scared. I can’t go through this again! I can’t risk hurting myself or hurting someone else like that again. I just can’t! You have taught me to rely on You alone for comfort & strength & love & fulfillment… I don’t know how to fit a man into that. Help me! I will refuse to have a man replace Your place in my heart, so show me Your will. If this is Your plan for my path, please make it so clear to both he & I that we are left with no doubts. Be the ruler of this relationship. If this is Your will, give him so much confidence of Your will to pursue me that he is willing to risk losing me in order to follow Your will. Give him the confidence to ask me out before January 1, three WEEKS from now. If he is willing to break his promise to me & risk losing me, all for the sake of obeying You, I will know that You have sent him to me & I will say yes. Your will be done. Amen.”

And then she slept.

***********************

In the days that followed, he kept his promise to her. He didn’t once mention the idea of a future romantic relationship. He was simply acting as her friend. They shared prayers together. They shared testimony of God working in their individual lives. They grew in their relationship with God more than with each other. There was no pressure to be good enough or to show off or to impress each other toward a relationship. It was easy & relaxed & a friendship built on the understanding that neither of us belonged to each other, but rather to Christ. There was laughter & fun & there were happy memories made as they chatted online almost every day.

She kept praying for peace in her heart & to know God’s will. She prayed several times about specific characteristics that she knew without uncertainty that God had shown her she needed in a husband.  Every time she prayed specifically about a characteristic or potential in this man, without fail, this guy randomly, out of the blue & with zero prompting from her, would tell a story about himself that displayed that exact characteristic, sometimes almost verbatim to her prayers. She was always left in wonder & awe to see God answer her questions & concerns so clearly. She could see His fingerprints in their budding friendship.

Along with their many online chats & visits at church functions, the two of them went out together on two more outings that held no romantic nuances. Just friends spending time together.

The third time they hung out in person (other than seeing each other at church events), their time for the day was coming to a close. It was December 31 and no mention of relationships had taken place since their first date. He had held true to his promise.

She shifted in her seat, secretly remembering her prayers about something happening before January 1 if it were God’s will. She began wondering if this meant that God would show her in a different way & that maybe the timing just wasn’t right yet… or if this would mean that His answer was a firm, “no”. She started praying silently, asking God for wisdom on which of these two scenarios were His answer.

Sitting in the car, parked in front of the house, she moved to begin saying her “goodbye until next time” when he, who had been sitting silently next to her for several minutes now, finally spoke up.

“Wait. I feel like I really need to tell you something. I have kept my promise. I have been praying about God’s will to overshadow my own & I haven’t mentioned relationships since that night that we last spoke about it. But three days ago, I feel like I got my answer. I have been praying since then for God to solidify His answer in my heart & to show me when I should tell you, since you made me promise to wait three months… Well, as we were about to say goodbye, I just got this overwhelming feeling that the answer was right now. I know it’s breaking the promise, but I can’t deny that push. I feel like I am supposed to tell you right now that I think God wants me to pursue a romantic relationship with you.”

…

…

…

Panic. Pure panic. Shock. Wonderment. Awe. Panic. Head spinning. Replaying words in her head. Processing the information as the car grew hot & the air grew thick & the car grew significantly smaller with every breath. Heavy breathing, trying not to pass out. Wondering at how God works in her life when she asks Him to & how faithful & amazing He is.

“Michelle…?” he asked her tentatively, fear starting to well inside him as well.

“Oh my gosh. I just… Oh my gosh… What? Did you just ask me out? Oh my gosh… It hasn’t been three months… How did you know…? Oh my gosh… I didn’t tell anyone… Oh my gosh… What just happened…?”

He sat staring at her, probably preparing himself for her to exit his car & never look back.

Seeing his worry, she realized that she hadn’t told him why she was freaking out. She began to tell him her prayers & the change she had made to want him to risk losing her to follow God first. She told him what happened.

Realization dawned on his face, relief & joy replaced his worry. Now he was sitting in his seat, letting the truth of God’s amazing work sink in.

The two of them sat quietly, amazed. Who knew that God would show up so clearly when they asked for His guidance? Who knew how much God cared about their budding relationship? Their eyes had been opened & now they could see more of the Truth… God really cared about them. He cared about guiding them when they ask Him to… He cared for their hearts.

God cared so much more than they had known before that night, & now they could sit & smile & realize just how big & how great & how loving God really was.

He was worth following. He was worth trusting.

He is worth our everything.

***********************

To be Continued…

Part 2 Thoughts

If you hadn’t guessed already from having “her” name revealed as “Michelle”, this is a true story based on my personal love story with my now husband.

I share this story every chance I get because I want girls & women to understand how very much God cares about our hearts & how much He is willing to interact with & guide us along on the journey.

So often, we try to “help Him along” by flirting & trying to be such good girlfriends, putting all of the relationship pressure on our own shoulders, but God is willing to lift that from us & replace it with the peace of knowing that He will be enough to fill our hearts & if we are to marry, He will guide us every step of the way if we allow Him to.

So trust Him, Lovely. If you are seeking love, seek it in God’s loving arms. Not sure how that works or how that could possibly satisfy you more than a man, ask God to show you. He won’t disappoint.

Don’t trust your deceitful heart. Trust God’s steadfast love, wisdom, care, & guidance.

He really is enough & He is waiting to show you how much He really does love you, with or without a man in your life.

Coming Up

The love story doesn’t end there… Check back for next month’s Special Feature blog post (every last Thursday of the month) for “A Love Story-Part 3″!

Also, check back every Monday morning for my latest blog post, encouraging women to shine hope into this dark world by laying out my weaknesses & allowing God’s glory to shine through them. See you then!

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I will feature an item that is changing lives. These pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Avalon Earrings

Empowering Women Out of Poverty in India & Thailand!

Made with brass & then silver-plated, these statement earrings are a nod to our Indian artisans’ culture.

Artisan Information:

The women we partner with in India do so much more than just create beautiful products. With every purchase, another woman is empowered out of poverty to be self-reliant! Women have the opportunity to earn an income, attend financial management classes, and receive education & healthcare. These women are now able to give their family a promising future because of your purchase!

Purchase this piece and empower a woman in India!

(*Also shown: Pearls of Hope Bracelet from Thailand.)

Shop Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE, Lovely!

This Month’s Special Feature Post

Once a month, on the last Thursday of each month, I will share with you my “Monthly Special Feature Post.” This month, I am sharing with you a short story that tells a tale of LOVE.

If you’re like me, you love a good love story. Well, this one has a twist. Read more to see what I mean….

************

A Love Story

She turned the heat up a smidge in her car as she glanced up at the building that would now be her place to visit every Sunday through Friday. Her job as the new church secretary started Monday, but since this was a church, she would now be attending their services, after saying goodbye to her beloved former church friends further South.

Her nerves were all scrunched up & racing everywhere at the same time as she looked back on the events that led her to this moment… this change.

It had been a crazy last eight years or so… with falling in love, to praying about marriage, to feeling that door slam in her face with unrest & fleeting peace about her desires to move forward with her relationship… to breaking his heart & crushing her own in the process.

Then, she had proceeded to breaking her friend’s heart, who had maybe fallen for her in the process of leaning on him too heavily for support through her own heartache.

It had all been a wreck, chaotic & painful. Even now, the memories felt somewhat sharp.

But she had worked to move on. She had read “When God Writes Your Love Story” by Eric & Leslie Ludy. She had been inspired, through that book, to not try to fashion a love story & to not tirelessly strive to hopefully be enough to lead a relationship to success in her own wisdom or efforts.

She had had the opportunity to be stuck in traffic for several hours with an aunt she had barely known, but who left a lasting impression of hope & wisdom & adventure that comes with trusting your singleness & your everything to God alone & letting Him fill you with the love your heart ached so badly for previously.

And even amongst her long talk with her aunt, she had held rewarding jobs, gone to & graduated from her dream college. She had trusted God through a relationship she hoped for, instead of leading it with flirtation, allowing God to take the lead, & therefore being rewarded with a friendship she could still claim today, after realizing it wasn’t God’s will for them.

These last eight years had grown her so much. She had a new perspective now. She no longer pined after the fantasy of living in a romance movie. She no longer clung to that idea as her only hope to feel worth & affection & love that she longed for so badly.

She felt more confident & secure than ever, even if she never married at all. And at a few years away from thirty, this was huge. She finally felt free to live her life for God & not rely on or strive after the love of a man ever again.

Sitting in her car, looking up at the building, she smiled & sighed a contented sigh… not one that she just happened to be feeling this morning, but a new peace that had been washed over her for several years, through the growth in her relationship of knowing God more & more… Of knowing that He really was enough to fill her heart & give her peaceful contentment in singleness. It was a gift that she treasured almost every single day.

She knew that God was the only one who saw her future. He was the only One who knew what pain or trials she would face & He was the only One who knew the right person with whom to ride it all out, even if that was just being her & God. God would take care of her. God was the only One who saw her future & He was the only One who knew what she needed for her future. He had this taken care of completely.

God knew her better than she knew herself. She could trust God, even in being “alone.”

So here she sat, glancing back up at this modest church building in Northern Virginia, on a crisp October Sunday morning—her new church & her new job. She didn’t know what the future held for her here, or what lessons she would learn, but she knew God did, & that was enough for her.

As she stepped out of her car, with purse & Bible in hand, she smiled.

Her new adventure awaits beyond those old wooden doors.

************

The church service was encouraging. The final song of the morning left her uplifted & hopeful of her time to come in this new place.

She had glanced around & noticed that the church was mainly comprised of white & gray-headed, friendly faces, as well as her longtime friend & his wife (also a longtime friend), who had recommended this job to her.

An announcement had been made about her joining the church staff & the church, in general, & friendly faces began to swarm around her with warm welcomes, hugs, & handshakes.

Then a young man.

He said something along the lines of, “We’re so happy to have you. Welcome to our church!” There was no hint of flirtation in his smile, just a genuine kindness, but her guard immediately shot up. She recognized quickly that he seemed to be the only other single young adult in the church & she did NOT want to become THAT girl to him—the only option for a date.

She plastered on a smile to cover her instant panic mode as she shifted nervously to shake his outstretched hand.

Being completely uninterested in starting any romantic relationships & not wanting to ever accidentally lead someone to believe otherwise (because she could not stand the idea of breaking someone’s heart again–or feeling that heartache herself, again), she felt it best to avoid him at all costs from here on out.

It was just safer that way.

************

After working at the church for several weeks, she left the auditorium laughing at whatever funny thing someone had just said, after church had just let out. She had a couple hours to kill before a special staff meeting began, so she decided to go plunker down in her cozy office chair to play Mahjong until then.

Striding confidently into the front office, toward her desk, she stopped abruptly upon realizing that the young man who had been so kind to her on her first Sunday was sitting in one of the chairs in her office (or really, the front office, near the parking lot).

He looked up at her & smiled politely.

A mental run-through of her options whooshed through her mind at lightning speed, Oh crap! Okay, he’s seen me, but maybe I can play it off & make an excuse for somewhere else I have to be… But crap, I can’t think of anywhere else I have to be & I just jolted to a stop in front of him, so it will be too obvious! I have to play this cool & just stride to my desk with a minimal polite nod & say a quick “hello” so I don’t give a bad impression, since I am staff here. I can do this, just go & nod & sit & look busy. Okay, go.

So, she did just that.

And he smiled back, quickly informing her that his ride was coming soon because he had carpooled to church this morning & then following with the fact that his ride had just gone to run a quick errand & would be returning soon to pick him up.

Hopefully very soon.

She smiled politely & said something lame, like, “Oh neat,” while shifting nervously in her chair, trying to look calm & really, really busy.

He didn’t take the hint, as he asked how she was doing & whether she was enjoying her new position here & whether she felt she was adjusting well.

She answered politely, but only enough to seem super busy while still remaining professional & just polite enough as she felt it necessary.

He then scooted his chair up to her desk so that they wouldn’t have to talk across the room.

Great. Just great.

She panicked a little now, nonchalantly pivoting her screen so he wouldn’t discover that her very important work was actually an unimportant game of Mahjong.

He asked about her life & what had brought her here, but only in a friendly, non-pushy or weird way. He talked about how he had just graduated from college as well & how he was back in town now, attending his parents’ church (his pending ride home) until he found somewhere with more young adults. He also told her that he felt a little alone in the church, friendship-wise, because there were so few his age (other than the married couple mentioned earlier). He had been praying about finding a new church, but felt God nudging him to stay, so he was giving it until December to decide (it was now late November).

She smiled politely, secretly wishing someone would come & break up their conversation. She really, really didn’t want him getting warmed up to her & thinking that she could be his new best friend & then potentially end up breaking his heart as well. She would NOT do that again. Her heart couldn’t handle it.

Despite her wall of determination, he said something randomly that made a burst of laughter erupt from her mouth & she struggled against the tears of laughing too hard.

Before she knew what was happening, the next ten minutes were spent suggesting to one another & then searching for funny videos on YouTube, watching them, & then erupting in laughter all over again.

Okay, he was nice, but she did not want to be friends with him. That always led to heartbreak, because her friendliness always got misinterpreted as romantic interest & confusion of feelings… & heartache almost always followed.

She needed an out for this conversation. Soon.

Her wish was granted as a car pulled into the lot. His parents. Finally.

He thanked her for the laughs, gathered his stuff, & headed out the door.

She had to admit, begrudgingly, that jollity still hung in the air a little as he left.

************

That night, as she lay sprawled across her still-made bed, browsing Facebook on her laptop, she noticed a little white notification bubble on Facebook.

It was a friend request…

From him….

… Oh no….

************

That accepted friend request (because really, how could she be supportive staff & be so heartless as to say ‘no’ to being a friend to someone who just recently expressed their need for more friendships?), but that accepted friend request inevitably led to daily chats about life & regular laughter.

His chats with her were becoming something that she would smile about when going about her day.

She purposely avoided any conversation that could be misinterpreted as flirting & even made comments to make her thoughts known about her disinterest, but it felt good to have a new friend, after recently moving back to Northern Virginia.

She was careful to indicate her intentions of avoiding any & all relationships, but in a non-assuming way (just to be sure). She wanted to be sure that he knew this was “Friend Zone City.” Only.

But the talks became regular & expected. And she couldn’t deny that she was glad for it.

… Until one momentous, heart-stopping moment.

As she logged on Facebook that night, a message indication bubble was waiting for her.

She clicked on it & regretted it the instant her eyes finished skimming the message.

He had asked her to dinner for the next evening. She panicked.

Crap! Crap crap crap crap CRAP!!!! What was happening?!? Hadn’t she been clear enough? Why was this happening to her?!? She had been careful, she had been SO, SOOO careful! She had even been close to being unnecessarily blunt about it!! Yes, they had shared prayers & laughter, but why?!?! Why was this happening?!?

After panic ebbed a tad, she started frantically praying about it, her eyes growing red & puffy with fear & panic & dread.

She decided on a solution….

She would pretend like she hadn’t read the message until Friday was already over & then she could brush it off as an “Oh, oops!” & smile & everything would be okay.

That would avoid hurting him & she could move on & hope he got the picture.

So that was the plan.

WAS the plan.

But as she was browsing Facebook, distracted & laughing at something else she had just read, another message bubble popped up.

She absentmindedly clicked on it, still chuckling.

It was him, asking a question about something or other. She answered without stopping to think about it, still caught up in the hilarity of the thing that had just brought her laughs.

Then it happened. He wrote her again…

“Oh great! You ARE online. I thought you weren’t because of the other message being unanswered. Did you get it?”

Her face flushed. The room suddenly got ten times smaller. Frustration at herself welled up inside her & threatened to overflow into an onslaught of verbally assaulting herself with accusations about having ONE job to keep herself clear of facing this exact situation, & then proceeded to HORRIBLY failing at that ONE job.

Great. Just great.

As she tried to play it off & play it cool, he wouldn’t let it go. He asked her again, right there.

“So, I had asked about dinner. Do you want to go with me to dinner tomorrow night?”

He was relentless!

Panic took over as she threw an adult temper tantrum in her room. Crying & begging God to remove this situation from her, not wanting to get in this kind of mess again. She laid there in defeat, agonizing over what to do next, to keep from hurting him… to keep from going down this road again.

This was exactly why she DIDN’T want guy friends. She did not want to break someone’s heart AGAIN.

She couldn’t handle it.

She considered quitting her job & going anywhere else.

She knew that wasn’t mature or the right answer. She kept praying.

God reminded her then of two things she had been learning & praying about over the last several years.

One, only God knew what she really needed. He saw past the surface. He saw past the present. He knew the potential that He created in each person. He saw her needs better than she knew them herself. She couldn’t judge accurately… only God could….

And two, she had promised God that because she had given up flirting or dating or anything that would lead a guy to her by her own efforts… she had also promised God that if someone had the guts to ask her out despite all of those things, she would trust that as a sign & agree to a single date with them.

And so here she was, at the brink of potentially doing the one thing she hated doing the most & had sworn that she would never risk doing again–potentially breaking a great guy’s heart by letting him feel something for her (or getting her own heart broken again, in the process).

She hoped, by one last hope, that she could deter him & that he would spare her of the fear of hurting him, so she made one last attempt at steering him away…

“So, who else is coming tomorrow?”

“Oh, just the two of us.”

Crap.

“Well, okay…. Um, I don’t have a lot of money right now, so maybe if we did something cheap….”

“Oh, well I am paying for us, so don’t worry about that.”

Double crap!

“Well, um, my planner is in the car, so I can check if I am free when I go out to get it in the morning… Hopefully I don’t forget, but I’ll try to remember.”

“That’s okay. I’ll pick you up at 7pm tomorrow.”

… … … …

“Um…. What? But I didn’t….”

“Alright, I have to head to bed. See you tomorrow night!”

And he’s gone…. And so was her chance to get out of this.

… What in the world just happened? How did that…? Why did he…? But she didn’t even….
What just happened?

She stared wide-eyed at her computer screen long after he signed off, her jaw dropped & her face flushed with shock.

What just happened…?

************

… To be continued.

Coming Next Week

***Check back on next month’s Special Feature Post (the last Thursday of each month) for Part 2 of “A Love Story.” I hope you have enjoyed it so far & I look forward to revealing the rest soon!***

Monday, I will continue with my regular posts of encouragement to you, so I will see you then!

I hope you enjoyed this month’s Special Feature Post!

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I will feature an item that is changing lives. These pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Sea Glass Necklace

Empowering women out of poverty in India & the Jordan!

Artisans recreate the look & feel of sea glass by upcycling glass bottles from local hotels & restaurants that would otherwise be discarded, & tumble it with water & sand from the Red Sea, until it is smooth & resembles the beautiful pieces found in on seashores. Sizes & colors may vary.

Artisan Information:

Many Jordanian women have their lives controlled by their closest male relative. They balance many customs at home, creating a lack of independence. Some of these women are divorced, widowed, or married to a man who may already have many wives. But amid struggles, these women we work with arrive to a family-like workplace. They can be heard singing, laughing, & drinking tea while creating our unique jewelry made from upcycled glass bottles. Your purchase empowers them with confidence & financial independence for the first time!

Purchase this piece & empower a woman in Jordan!

Shop Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE, Lovely!

(*This is Part 2/2 of a Special Feature Short Story, called “Falling.” Check out Part 1/2, here!*)

******************

Having been awake for three days & having eaten what I soon discovered was rabbit meat (not my favorite, by the way), I was starting to feel a little more alert & a little more safe.

But as the initial fears of immediate danger & hunger wore off, I began to fear something even greater—the loss of my husband.

My husband wasn’t on that flight with me, but the thoughts that must be going through his mind right now sent my emotions flaring.

I wanted to call him or contact him in some way, to let him know I was okay. I wanted to hold him & reassure him. I wanted to continue with the life we had planned together.

But I couldn’t.

And because I couldn’t, I needed to do my best to figure out how to survive this new environment… this new life.

This could be the new rest of my life….

I thought over what I had learned in the last few days of being awake.

I have learned that we have no way to communicate with the rest of the world, to let them know we are alive. I have learned that we are on some sort of abandoned island that looks to have once been fully inhabited. I have learned how to start a fire & how to cook good ol’ rabbit meat (bleh).

The building I initially woke up in was indeed a hospital… one that was abandoned a LONG time ago, by the looks of the overgrowth & overall dirtiness of the place. It was covered in vines, moss, & mildew.

There was still, surprisingly, some equipment left in storage containers. But everything else looked old & grimy, for the most part—except the beds, which looked only mildly dirty & dusty.

The only other building we have found was a dormitory-type building directly across from the hospital. Everyone had been assigned to rooms, keeping women with the children & able-bodied men close to the exits, in case whoever once inhabited this place (or anyone else who could be “unfriendlies”, for that matter), were to try to get in.

Other than room assignments, the camp was complete chaos. Everyone was fighting over anything they found. People were either crying, arguing, or avoiding the rest of us. Bickering was everywhere. Some were power hungry, some were just plain hungry, & most of us were just scared, to be honest.

Something in me just couldn’t take the sight of this. Looking around & seeing our only chance for survival—working together—just being tossed out because of fear. The whole situation equally angered & disheartened me.

There were only about 40 of us left, including some children.… We could not afford to be so divisive & hurtful & defensive. We needed to work together, but I was too shy to say anything, & something about waking up late to the party, made me feel less than qualified to say anything at all.

So I had kept pretty quiet around camp. Hopefully someone will help make sense of this mess before things get even worse for us.

Then I heard it… a gunshot.

We have guns here?!?

Everyone scattered & screamed & covered their ears.

I saw the culprit & noticed two things right away: One, they were standing fairly close to me, facing the opposite direction, & two, I realized they had only shot a warning shot to threaten someone else.

Realizing how close they were, my fight instinct finally (Finally!) decided to kick in & everything happened in a blur as I came up from behind them & knocked the gun out of their hand… not the smartest move, but it was instinct to act fast.

Once the gun fell to the ground, & I realized there was no immediate threat, I lost it.

“SHUT UP! EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP!

WHY ARE WE ALL FIGHTING WITH EACH OTHER? DON’T YOU ALL SEE THAT WE NEED EACH OTHER TO SURVIVE?!!

STOP FIGHTING. STOP GIVING UP! WORK TOGETHER!!!

YOU—Go form a search party for more wood!

YOU—Organize a search party to look for debris & other passengers we might have missed!

YOU—Assemble a hunting party to make sure we have sufficient food!

YOU—Find a team to secure water holes nearby!

EVERYONE STOP PITTING YOURSELVES AGAINST EACH OTHER & TEAM UP TO WORK TOGETHER. OUR LIVES DEPEND ON IT!! GO!!!”

Everyone stared at me with shock & wide eyes.

Having been the quiet “coma girl” up to this point, no one quite knew how to respond to that, until one gentlemen stood up & yelled, “WELL, YOU HEARD THE WOMAN! GO!!!”

He looked at me & nodded.

That did the trick. Everyone scampered off & began electing team members to their assigned tasks.
I just stood there, in awe myself, unbelieving that those words had ever come out of my mouth in the first place.

******************

Several weeks later, I now sat in the passenger side of a rundown pickup that some mechanic, the current driver of said vehicle, had found randomly in the overgrowth & had worked it back to life with supplies he found at our camp, aka the abandoned hospital.

Staring outside at the lush greenery as the truck bounced along the rocky dirt, makeshift road, I thought about how I got here. I still wasn’t confident in the new position of “camp leader,” but because I had been the only one bold enough to take a stand (more like fed up & desperate enough), I was given the title whether I liked it or not.

Several of the more influential people in the group handled any naysayers for me, by reminding them that I had been the one to bring the camp together. No one else really wanted the responsibility of keeping everyone sane & happy anyway.

I reluctantly accepted this role, for the mere hopes that we could avoid any more fights or injuries (or deaths). I just wanted us to survive… & to not have to live in fear for our lives every waking moment.

As the pickup truck bounced down the road, I glanced out the dirty windows, amazed at the view before me of our small group of airplane-crashed colonists paving the way for our survival.

I wondered at our luck to even find this truck, abandoned in the woods. We had little fuel available, but it was quite handy in hauling heavy wood for building new structures & for expanding our camp.

The driver’s name was Fred (AKA the mechanic who got this truck running). He was a nice guy, Fred, & I remembered again with appreciation that day he had shouted back at the crowd to get themselves together after my little (big?) outburst that day.

I was lucky to have friends like him, whom I felt I could trust.

But part of that made me ache to my core. I felt guilty for feeling contentment when my loving husband was probably mourning my death, after a funeral he most likely held already. I ached for my family & my friends. I wanted to hug them & shower them in kisses & reassurance & love.

I wanted us to all be together again. A family reunited.

The pain caught in my throat like a heavy lump as I watched the forest go by on this bumpy road, through the woods.

Fred noticed.

“You’re thinking about your family & friends again, huh? It’s hard for me to focus any energy on that because it just kicks me in the gut.”

“Yeah. I can’t help it.” I fought back tears. (Why is it always harder to keep from crying when you talk about your pain out loud?)

“I’m always here for you if you need a friend. Don’t forget that.” He reached over & gave my shoulder a reassuring squeeze, keeping his eyes on the narrow, uneven road.

And I knew he meant it. He had made it clear that he in no way wanted to replace my husband, in case we ever could be reunited, but he also wasn’t shy about expressing a fondness for me. He had said several times that he admired my ability to get everyone working together & my compassion for the hurting ones here (which was all of us, really).

It was a little harder for Fred to understand, not having left a wife behind, but his heart hurt for me & a part of both of us realized the harsh reality of the little chance we had of being reunited with our families ever again.

Fred didn’t want to live in the misery. He wanted to start fresh after having been stuck here for a little over a month with no word from the outside world.

He wanted to move on & marry me & start a new life here. He was sensitive to my hope, though, & never pushed me on the point.

But I wasn’t ready to give up. I couldn’t. If there was even a chance to run into my husband’s arms again, I wanted to be ready & open to do so. I loved him. He was my person. I couldn’t give up.

But ache burned in my chest because I knew, logically, that may never happen. I knew he was probably mourning my loss. I knew he was a great catch & that any woman would be lucky to have him by her side. I knew that it wouldn’t be long before he let himself love a woman like that again, even if it took a few years. I knew all of that.

But I just couldn’t let go. I couldn’t.

I also knew that Fred was a steady guy. He was kind & honest & ready to face each day with hard work & diligence, always ready to jump in & help someone else. I admired him as a wonderful friend.

I hid my face by turning to look out the window even further as a tear rolled down my cheek. I never wanted to be faced with this type of decision & I would do whatever I had to, to hold off forever from making it. I will wait for my love.

But would he wait for me? What if he remarried? And I wanted kids. Should I give up on that dream & potentially die here on this island alone and having never raised a family? How long is too long to wait? Is it ever okay to move on? How could I? What if he waited for me? What if he didn’t?

Questions swirled through my mind, making the tears run faster, but one thing was certain. God had kept us alive & He was making a way for us. He would have to help quiet my heart & guide my steps. He would show me the way.

Because even if we didn’t, God did have a plan.

******************

Then, my eyes opened….

I was in my bed.

The sound of my husband’s steady breathing coming from his sleeping form beside me.

I blinked against the darkness.

It was… a dream…?

So vivid. So real. But a dream?

I get choked up at the questions that had been swirling through my head just moments before, & I thank God that they were all only in a dream.

I thank God for the man sleeping soundly next to me, as I lay there, thinking through those hard questions that had just plagued me moments ago…

As I drift back into sound, peaceful sleep, I smile a sigh of relief as the dream fades & a new one fills its place….

Coming Next Week:

Thank you all for tuning into Part 2/2 of my recent short story, “Falling.” This story was inspired by an actual dream I once had. The question was still difficult to wake up to, but I was thankful to find it all a dream. I hope you enjoyed the adventure!

Check out “Falling”-Part 1/2, here!

Make sure to check back on Monday to see the introduction to our next set of topics!

A Note from Michelle:

If you want to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” & “Hope is Found” pages, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I will feature an item that is changing lives. These pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Charisma Bracelet

Representing Woman Artisans in India!

This bracelet has lavender and light pink suede, threaded with faceted gold colored beads.

Artisan Information:

The women we partner with in India do so much more than just create beautiful products. With every purchase, another woman is empowered out of poverty to be self-reliant! Women have the opportunity to earn an income, attend financial management classes, and receive education and healthcare. These women are now able to give their family a promising future because of your purchase!

Purchase this piece and empower a woman in India!

(*Also featuring the Lyla Pearl Necklace & Empire Earrings.*)

Shop Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE, Lovely!

The seats started shaking.

I gripped the arm rests, sure that this moment of turbulence would soon pass.