My Heart Has Gotten Colder

My husband & I have started trying to pray together before bed so we can share whatever may be on our heart/mind with each other & with God.

As we were praying, I just realized that my main prayer was for my lukewarm heart. I have talked the last couple weeks in my blog about people-pleasing & living in constant need of approval even in how I worship or anything. How it has dimmed my light—taking my focus off pleasing & honoring God as my main focus & instead putting too much stock in whether or not I am pleasing enough to everyone around me.

Well, you may already be aware of this, but the truth is—it is always impossible to please everyone. And in trying to do so anyway, you must water down yourself to be more palatable to more people.

And that’s what I have done. Watered myself down. I stopped drawing & dancing & singing & enjoying the little daily blessings from God all around me because I was too afraid of not doing something well enough.

It’s Okay to be a Work-in-Progress

Hearing “The Magical Yet” read last year sparked this realization first in my heart. I had begun to be too afraid to ever try, to ever do… because what if I am not good enough at it?

I have even projected this feeling to God, as if I am never good enough for Him either & have just sort of walled myself off from feeling passionate about Him even for fear of “doing it wrong.” As if He is also constantly disapproving of my constant inadequacies.

But He knows I am inadequate. He knows I am not enough. That is the very reason He sent Jesus to die. To rise again. (Isaiah 53:5) That is the very reason He says I need to abide in Him & Him in me. (John 15:5) I need Him.

Don’t be Afraid of Your Need to Grow

I need to retrain my focus. I need to let go of fears of insufficiencies holding chains over me from progress & joy. I need to let myself try, fail, do, sing, enjoy the blessings of God around me every day, living a life of praise & not fear.

Not to live my life my way or do whatever I wish, but to stop worrying so much about whether everyone else is praising me or criticizing me over every little detail of my life. As long as I live according to how God says & walk obediently to Him first, naysayers can be naysayers.

That is where I begin again. With my eyes fixed on Him.

Only His Opinion Matters When Others Disagree

Imagine if Jesus’ disciples, or if the authors of the Bible (inspired by God) were to stop worshipping or living according to God’s direction because other people didn’t approve of it always all the time?

What if Jesus had just stepped down & said, “Oh, okay, sorry everyone! I won’t bother you anymore with the truth that is upsetting you so much.”

Jesus was HATED by church leaders even.

Don’t Go Hating on Church Leaders

Now, in their case, they had grown so accustomed to all of their rules upon rules & their way of doing things, that when Jesus challenged them on it, they hated Him for it. They hated Him for challenging their spiritual authority. They hated Him for challenging their role as leadership–their power.

They needed a lesson in humility, didn’t they? In finding their hope in Jesus Christ & not in themselves.

They had felt satisfied that “as long as we do such & such or avoid such & such, we are good!” But Jesus challenged them with the fact that even their THOUGHTS mattered to God. Even their MOTIVATIONS in their actions mattered. (Matthew 5:17-6:15)

Not just checking off the right “Christian-y” things to be a “good” person.

God cares about the HEART.

But, all this to say—the leaders convinced themselves they meant well, but they were missing the whole point.

Well-Meaning Is Not Always the Same Thing as God’s Will

Then there were even the fellow Christians. They were obeying truth & cherishing & surrendering to Christ—but it was still easy to think on human terms & to judge a situation based on what made logical sense to them.

Like, when Paul said he was going to return somewhere where the people there had already made it clear they were out for his blood for the things he was saying—speaking truth & the hope found in Jesus Christ alone….

And, like anyone who loves & cares deeply for someone, all the fellow Christians could think & say was: “You CAN’T go THERE!! They will KILL you!”

His response? “What are you doing, weeping & breaking my heart? For I am ready not only to be imprisoned but even to die in Jerusalem for the name of the Lord Jesus.” (Acts 21:11-14)

Even Christians Get It Wrong Sometimes

Paul’s well-meaning Christian friends were focused on earthly things—the safety & security of their friend—wonderful things to care about when it comes to the life of someone you care about… instead of focusing on the eternal—that even IF he died, if God WAS leading Him, then God had more than a good enough reason, & that “even ‘til death” was MORE than WORTH it.

He understood that death was a small price when considering sharing the hope we have because of Jesus Christ—he was eternity-focused.

His friends weren’t being evil for caring for his well-being, but they could have kept him from obedience to God’s leading if he had tried to please them above pleasing God.

We’re All Human… But We All Need Each Other

Now, we have to be careful talking about misguided church leaders & well-meaning but misguided church-goers, because the Bible is very clear that we need to be plugged into a church. (Colossians 3:13; Hebrews 10:24-25; 1 Timothy 3:15) We need fellowship. We need the coming together. We need a shepherding pastor looking out for our spiritual well-being & growth. (Acts 20:28; 1 Thessalonians 5:12-13; Hebrews 13:17)

But they are all people, just like me. And while much can be gained in sharpening one another (Proverbs 27:17) & edifying (building up) & encouraging (lifting up) of one another (1 Thessalonians 5:11)… when their opinions begin to trump obedience to God’s leading, it becomes a problem… a big problem.

I need to learn to separate the two.

They are all supplemental to all I get from abiding in Him & letting Him lead my life. They are not the main thing.

Everyone Will Always Have an Opinion to Share, but be Right Before the Lord & Let the Rest GO

I think about David. He was so overcome with joy & praise & awe & wonder & worship that he was dancing his heart out so much so that his wife chided him for embarrassing her in front of her maidens. (2 Samuel 6:14-23)

But his response was beautiful because he said he should have danced even more wildly as an outpouring of praise.

If I am truly living to please & honor Him with everything I do in my life, I don’t need to be worried about how everyone else might turn their nose up at me or roll their eyes or raise their eyebrows in judgement.

I just need to worry about pleasing & honoring God in my response to Him & His lead.

Sometimes It’s Just NOT Your Business–If It’s Not Direct Sin, It’s Between Them & the LORD

The Bible addresses judgement in several ways. One of which is: “who are you to judge your neighbor?” which is not saying to not point out sin… it is saying. for one: don’t be self-righteous in judging someone else & how they worship because it doesn’t look like how you do it or how your church did it growing up. (James 4:12)

Don’t think, “oh, they listen to worship music other than HYMNS? Can they even CALL that WORSHIP music?!” or “They raise their hands in church? What, do they think that makes them extra spiritual or something, lol?”

Stop doing that. If you’re concerned that SIN is involved, try PRAYING for God to reveal that to them & give them discernment rather than being a busy-body judging every person’s intent by their actions which you may not understand or relate to.

And get this—even if they ARE doing it with wrong intent, which you cannot possibly know unless you know how to read minds—it should NOT affect whether or not YOU worship. You focus on YOU.

Fixing My Focus

I have let all of everyone’s opinions shape me. Even if they weren’t even intending to do that to me…. I need to be fixing my focus.

I let the turned-up noses, raised eyebrows, & rolled eyes shape how I worship God.

I let the well-meaning opinions of others sway how I handle situations versus keeping my eyes eternity-fixed.

I let the customs of certain church bodies guide me versus looking to God as my guide & unwavering standard, & rather than understanding every group of people is going to do things a little differently, but that doesn’t make it “more right” than the way another church may do things—unless one is acting contrary to God’s Word.

I need to stop judging. I need to stop being so concerned with being judged.

Eyes fixed on Him.

That is where I begin again. With my eyes fixed on Him.

Turning Back to the Heart of Worship… Where It’s All about HIM

Who are you trying to impress? Who are you looking around to see if you’re “doing it right”? Who is your standard?

Are you getting to know Him & what pleases & honors Him through the Bible & prayer with Him? Are you bowing to Him alone? Are you looking to Him for approval? Or to the crowds, your church, your family, Christian leaders, authors, speakers? Who are you seeking to please? Him? Or others?

Where is your focus?

Shine HOPE by LETTING GO of the chains of everyone else’s expectations & opinions & well-meaning contradictions to eternity-focus…. By letting God be your guide in all, with your eyes fixed on HIM as the One to please above all else.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement right here on my blog/website @ www.MichelleHydeOnline.com.

Share with friends & family… & SUBSCRIBE by “Joining My Tribe,” so you never miss a week!

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

A Note from Michelle:

(***Check out my FREE Journal Printable Resources: “Accountability Partner Guide + Question Prompts” & “Bible Study Question Prompts ,” as well as “Prayers of Surrender” prayer guides!***)

This blog/website has been running for over 5.5 years now! THANK YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” tab. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” tab, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox (make sure to check your other inbox folders), along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Consider these pieces when shopping for friends, family, or yourself. Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Indian Rose Bracelet (INDIA)

This exquisite, beaded bracelet is a testament to the skilled craftsmanship of women in India, who meticulously handcrafted it using radiant pink jasper beads and delicately incorporated gold accent beads featured throughout the design. The Indian Rose Bracelet is beautiful while creating dignified, necessary jobs for women in areas of extreme poverty of India. In an area where vulnerable women are often exploited by sweatshops, the women in this Artisan community can work in a safe environment.

***Purchase this beautiful bracelet to support empowering women in India out of poverty!***

How You Can Help the Artisans & Support My Website:

#1 is PRAY. Financial help is great & helps pay my website fees & helps support these women artisans… but God’s help is always needed most… both for encouragement & for spiritual hope, through Jesus, for the women we support through our ethical fashion purchases. Always PRAY first.

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Your purchases not only help these women, but my commissions help me in continuing this website/blog, encouraging women all around the world with the HOPE we have in Jesus. Win-win-win!

Love ya lots! Have a wonderful week!