We’re All Broken in Our Own Way

For me, it’s always been easy to look at the highlight reel of other ladies’ lives on social media, especially those living to proclaim the grace of Jesus, & forget that they are broken humans just like me.

You may feel like ”broken” is a strong word, but their brokenness may be from wrong choices, rebellion from God, trauma of their past, etc., but every person has a form of brokenness… just like me.

Maybe you observe me & see my smiling face on my videos or my weekly blog posts, running for the last 4 years (how has it already been 4 years?!) & you mistakenly believe I am the something to strive for… as if I am the finished product & you’re the broken, work-in-progress.

But I assure you that it couldn’t be further from reality. We all have areas we’re stronger in than others & it’s easy to see those strong, already-grown-in-areas in others & forget that they also have weak areas, too.

God Helps Me in My Weaknesses & Human Brokenness

I may have stuck with this blog for 4 years, but not without a lot of procrastinating, kicking & screaming & then eventual submission to God’s help on my part.

And aside from my I’d-rather-just-skip-it-&-be-lazy tendencies, I have so many scars & hurt areas of my heart that God has had to lead me through.

Like we talked about last week, I had to be willing to submit those hurt areas to Him for help, but I wasn’t always willing.

The Pride of Refusing God’s Help

You would think if I was hurting, that I would quit my way for His, but oftentimes, I find comfort in my bitterness because it feels like it’s deserved. It is hard to trust my hurts to someone else, even if that someone else is God.

I want to feel angry when I’ve been hurt. I don’t want to let it go because it feels like I am letting the offender off the hook when I do.

Because of this stubborn pride, I created some of my own scars, just from refusing to be helped by God.

Some of My Many Scars Where God Helped Make Me Whole

I have been sexually assaulted by a friend whom I trusted.

I have struggled in the past with feelings that I was too fat & ugly to ever be loved.

When I was younger, I felt my identity was as “The Flirt” because I felt it was how I fit in… Trapped by a fear to never let my guard down to show the real me or risk losing my friend group.

I have gone through such loneliness that I refused to pray anymore because I was so bitter & angry that God didn’t make my discomfort go away, versus trusting Him to be my enough in it.

I have had to walk away from & break the heart of someone I loved because God clearly said NO, when I so desperately wanted Him to say yes, feeling the harsh sting of heartbreak.

I have felt lost & swimming through life, not knowing where I fit in or what my purpose was, not feeling clear direction in any certain way.

I have faced 2 years+ of depression in my past, where suicide thoughts were daily & I felt like my very existence was a burden on those I loved.

I have been betrayed by friends whom I trusted with my everything.

I could go on & on, but one very important fact must shine out to you from all of that—God has been faithful through every bit of it.

But, GOD IS FAITHFUL

I don’t have my life all together. I fail & choose wrongly way too often. I choose my “wisdom” over God’s more often than not. I am selfish & proud towards God, & have given Him far too many reasons to just quit on me & move on for good….

But God is faithful. He is patient & kind. He takes my brokenness & He makes me whole.

Every time I have faced any of those things, no matter how long it took me to come to Him—when I did, He was faithful & forgiving & all I needed through making me whole despite whatever it was.

I am where I am, running this blog & a social media community not because I am the prime example, but because despite my brokenness, He makes me whole.

He heals. He forgives. He restores. He gives purpose. He strengthens. He comforts.

He makes me whole.

God Makes Me Able

So, when you see some Christian woman leading a group to encourage women toward Jesus, even much more successfully than my humbly small little group, don’t look at her as the prime example either.

See her as a fellow human with broken parts made whole by the power & love & grace of Jesus, empowered & led by Him to serve Him as she does.

Every week, ashamedly, is a battle of the wills for me—Obey God or lay on the couch scrolling random videos on social media. Obey God or watch tv with snacks. Obey God or waste my time away doing literally anything else I can think of.

Do I submit typically? Yes. But not immediately, not without His help & sometimes not even willingly.

My Prayers Usually Sound Something Like:

“God, I’m sorry I don’t want to do this. I know it would maybe encourage others, if they even read it. I know maybe it points to you even though it feels no one cares. I know it’s important to be consistent & to keep showing up, to show that You are faithful, even when I fail. But I don’t wanna. I want to be lazy & selfish & have an easier time without work I don’t even get paid for. I don’t have a boss to answer to. I could just quit. I’m sorry for only wanting to think about myself & my ease. I’m sorry for such shallow motives. Please forgive me. Help me submit to You more readily. Help me do this. Help me to show up for You. HELP ME. I’m sorry I am so selfish. Please forgive me & please help me. My weakness for Your glory, always. In Jesus’ name, I pray: AMEN.”

Nothing Is Beyond His Reach

No matter how broken I have felt in my past, nothing has been beyond His reach… Nothing has been beyond His ability to heal & to turn to my good.

God is faithful. He loves you. He knows your broken parts & He can help make you whole.

Offer those broken parts of yours up to Him. Don’t shoulder them as ”just the way it is.”

Let Him take you broken parts & make you whole.

Don’t Hold God Back from Taking Your Broken Parts & Making You Whole

Do you feel trapped or controlled or limited by your broken parts?

Do you feel it’s “just the way it is”?

Do you look at others as “the finished product” versus a fellow work-in-progress?

Let God heal. Submit your weaknesses to Him & ask Him to work through them for His glory.

Ask God to help you trust Him more than “the way it is.”

Ask Him to help you see others through the lens of HIS glory through their human weaknesses versus their own supposed strength/glory.

And shine HOPE by trusting that God can take YOUR broken parts & make you WHOLE for HIS glory.

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

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A Note from Michelle:

Thank YOU for your continued support & encouragement. <3

If you would like to learn more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

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Fashion as a Force for GOOD:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Zoya Earrings

Zoya means “shining, life” in Hindi. These stylishly stunning gold-toned earrings are handcrafted in India, featuring genuine freshwater pearls on a delicate linked-chain design. Every purchase provides fair-trade jobs in areas of extreme poverty in India.

How You Can Help:

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michellehyde.tradesofhope@gmail.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

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