Tried Already…

I don’t know about you, but this has been a common theme in my life. If I can’t figure out how to accomplish something, I just avoid it.

Whether it be organizing something that I don’t quite understand how or whether it be a life situation, if I know I should do it, but don’t know how… I feel like I just can’t.

Anyone Else?

One good example of this is reading my Bible consistently.

Do you feel like that comes easy for you? Or do you struggle beyond reading a few verses here & there (if any)?

If you know my testimony, found HERE, you know I accepted Jesus’ grace when I was a child… & YET, I could never seem to be consistent reading my Bible beyond a few weeks or so of motivation.

Soo Many Reasons (AKA Obstacles)

It wasn’t that I didn’t care, it just seemed either boring, unrelatable, or that the many of life’s obstacles seemed to keep me from getting into it long-term.

Once I realized how much I could really gain from reading the Bible: eternal perspective, God’s Truths, hope, relatable stories of others failing or seeing how God came through for them, “boring & unrelatable” were no longer my opinion of Bible reading, & YET, it still seemed almost impossible to be consistent.

“I Promise I Love God, But…”

I often felt like I had to make excuses for it or defend how I loved God because it made me feel like either a bad Christian or a failure of one. I had tried COUNTLESS times to get into it & would always seem to be overwhelmed by an onslaught of obstacles that always got in the way.

I sort of kept that detail (of not reading my Bible regularly) on the downlow so no one would think poorly of me or doubt my salvation &/or love of God.

It was embarrassing & riddled me with guilt.

But I just could NOT seem to keep up with it.

SO MANY Obstacles!

Whenever I made effort, the obstacles seemed to overcome me instantly.

Either I would get sick, have a headache, forget, get distracted, be exhausted, feel stubborn/rebellious, or just flat out not do it.

Trying to read my Bible daily seemed like trying to run up a snowy/slick hill. I might make it up a bit, but then I would slide all the way back to the beginning.

It made me stop trying after a while, thinking I am just not good at it.

MAJOR Perspective Shift in Knowing God Can Help

But then I read Andrew Murray’s collection of writings on Prayer.

One thing he thoroughly emphasized is how the current church culture is training people to be burnt out, exhausted, & full of shame at not feeling like a good enough Christian.

The ingredient he stressed is missing from our training is the key to everything we’re missing in this equation: God’s help.

The Lie: If Christian, We Should Just Be Able to Do It on Our Own

I feel like oftentimes, it is sort of an understood lie that if we are Christian, therefore having God’s power to help us, that means we should automatically succeed at everything we try. Therefore, it is often thought that if we are NOT succeeding, we must not be believing hard enough or are maybe not a good enough Christian.

WRONG.

The Truth: We Need to Draw from Him in Order to Succeed

The truth is that if we are Christian, we have been forgiven & are allowed ACCESS to God’s power, but we must go to Him & draw from Him to receive it! And I don’t mean, read your Bible enough & prove your sincerity & then you can have it… NO. I mean ASK HIM FOR HELP.

We are allowed to ASK GOD FOR HELP in obeying Him & honoring Him with our lives!!

In fact, not only are we ALLOWED to ask Him for help, we SHOULD be asking for His help.

He Is the VINE… We Are Just Branches

He. Is. Our. VINE.

We are mere branches & without drawing FROM HIM, we are just a dead stick on the ground.

So, ask Him.

Ask Him to help you have courage. Ask Him to give you wisdom. Ask Him for help in setting aside time for Him. Ask Him for focus. Ask Him for clarity. Ask Him for the willpower to do it!

Not As an Excuse to Not Act

And I don’t mean, “God, please help me with this & until I feel helped to my liking, I just won’t do it. I’ll go do what I would rather do right now until you do all the work for me.”

NO.

I mean, “God, I am [stubborn & hard-hearted, lazy, distracted, or tired], please give me [clarity, willpower, strength, courage, peace, etc.] to do this & knowing this honors You, I know You will help me & that in my own strength, I will fail a million times. So, I will stay here & keep asking & act on the knowledge & faith that You are capable of & will help me to obey & follow You. I need You AS I DO IT. Amen.”

Be willing to ACT on FAITH that HE is your solution… that if there is ANY way for you to be consistent & faithful, God can accomplish filling in where you lack.

Leaning in Where I Lack… (AKA Everything)

Doing this… leaning into Him when I want to quit or just don’t feel like it physically, mentally, emotionally, whatever… is the ONLY way I am able to be consistent in reading my Bible EVERY DAY for THREE YEARS now.

Taking This Truth to Other Excuses/”Failures”

And now, my challenge rests in improving personal time with Him, talking with Him, sharing my burdens with Him, asking for His help with trauma of my past & my hurts in the midst of emotions, telling Him everything I am so grateful to Him for, & coming to Him to intercede on behalf of others I care about.

My new challenge is trusting Him to help me pray more frequently, deeply, & meaningfully.

And the same rule applies. I need to trust God with help in it versus saying, “I’m just not very good at setting aside time for or focusing on prayer.”

I may not be good at it, but where I am limited, He is limitless.

Because He Can

It’s time we stop focusing on where we end & instead, start leaning into the One who has all we need to accomplish what He asks of us & all that honors Him & brings Him glory in this hurting world that needs Him so much.

He’s worth it!

Shine HOPE by asking for His help in how to do it, when to do it, & help in what you need in order to do it. He has all you need, Lovely!

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

Share with friends & Subscribe by Joining My Tribe, so you never miss a week!

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Restoring Hope Necklace

This versatile, reversible necklace features mother of pearl in hues of black on one side & off-white on the other, hanging from an antiqued brass chain.

Artisan Information:

In Asia, poverty leads many women to be sexually exploited in brothels. These women want to provide for their families but have so few options. But through your purchase, women are being rescued from these brothels & rehabilitated. Holistic care is given to these women, including a shelter, job training, healthcare, counseling, & educational grants for themselves & their children. You can help these women experience restoration for their future!

Purchase this piece & empower a woman in Asia!

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

A Quick Glance Back

A couple weeks ago, I began discussing the topic of “Living Love”. The first topic I discussed was about living graciously, with intentional kindness. (Read that post, here.)

Last week, I introduced the topic of loving people, even when it’s hard. I honed in on five different reasons that make it hard for us to love others. Those five reasons include:

1. Loving Our Enemies
2. Loving People Who Are Difficult to Love
3. Loving People Different Than Us
4. Loving Through Trauma & Pain (today’s post)
5. Loving When We Don’t Feel Like It (also today’s post)

(To catch up, check out Part 1 + Introduction to this topic, here.)

Today, I would like to finish off the topic we started last week of living love, even when it’s hard, by talking about those last two areas of difficulty in loving others—Loving Through Trauma and Pain & Loving When We Don’t Feel Like It.

Sometimes We Don’t Get It, & That’s OK

To begin talking about loving others through trauma & pain, I need to address this very important point—sometimes we don’t get it, & that’s ok.

Have you ever had a friend or loved one pour their sorrows on you, only to leave you feeling completely helpless & uncomfortable—squirmy even—eager to change the subject?

I know it has happened to me, & I know I can’t be alone in this.

We are called, by God, to share each other’s burdens. We are called to lift one another up & encourage one another, pointing each other back to the hope & promises of God.

So, then why can it be so uncomfortable?

Partly because we are caught off guard, but I think partly because we feel a pressure & a guilt to make all their troubles go away. And if we don’t know how to do that, we freeze & are left feeling uncomfortable.

Another reason is maybe we are personally strained or stressed, & taking on the strain or stress of your friend seems too much to bare.

Bringing Back Perspective

But let me bring everything back into perspective…

We ARE weak. We ARE insufficient. We ARE incapable of juggling or solving it all…

BUT…

Guess who isn’t any of those things? GOD.

God is all-powerful, all-knowing, all-wise, & all-capable!

HE IS ENOUGH.

So, when you feel the weight of the world crushing you to the floor, in the midst of the struggle, stop trying to carry it yourself!

And when a friend comes to you with burdens, take them to Him—right then & there.

If they were desperate enough to wear their heart on their sleeve, pour their heart out to you, & risk rejection through vulnerability—then it is important enough to step aside or stop right where you are & respond with this:

“Hey, I am so sorry you are facing this right now. Can I give you a hug? Can we stop right now & pray together? I may not know how to help, but God is big enough & He can bring wisdom or healing or grace to this situation, so let’s go to Him right now & ask Him for it.”

You don’t need to know all the answers—because He does. You don’t need to know how to fix everything—but God gives peace & wisdom & strength to those who ask Him.

So, ask!

Loving Through Trauma & Pain

So, keeping that in mind, we come to the topic of loving others who are hurting immensely, maybe more than we have ever or will ever experience in our lifetime.

It can be easy to be intimidated by the great pain that others face, especially when we can’t understand their situation & we feel like fools with nothing useful to say… And that’s okay.

Like I mentioned above, we really can’t fully relate to or understand others, & we don’t have to. God can give us the words. God can give us the strength. God can give us the wisdom.

Sometimes it’s just a matter of sitting silently with your friend or being a listening ear. Sometimes you just hold their hand & sit by them. Sometimes you just PRAY.

But keep showing up (or sometimes giving them space), keep loving them, & keep praying!

It’s Hard to See Them Hurt

Whether the pain or trauma is a chronic illness, life-threatening health condition, depression, anxiety, or a traumatic life event (or other difficult situation), take the time to listen to your friend. Let them know that you are not going anywhere & that it’s ok to not be ok—that they don’t have to pretend with you.

Pray with them & love them as they are.

Society puts a lot of pressure on seeming happy & confident & self-reliant, so when we aren’t those things, we feel broken & in the way.

Let your friends know they don’t have to fake it because you love them even in the storms of life—even when their life’s a mess & even when they feel broken & scarred.

God is Able!

Let God fill in the gaps where you are inadequate. Let God direct your words & let God encourage your friend through your words & presence.

Let God use you to be a light to them in their dark moments.

Because whether we like to admit it or think about it, we all have dark moments arise in life. There is sin in this world & that sin results in a broken world. Pain is inevitable at times.

So, trust God through the storms & keep on loving when it’s difficult.

Loving Others When You Don’t Feel Like It

There are two areas I want to touch on with this specific area. Sometimes we don’t feel like loving someone because of our own stress, strain, or pain, & sometimes it’s our own attitudes that keep us back from loving others the way we are called to love them.

Loving Through the Storms

Here’s a little mental picture of how life felt for me a couple times this past week….

Imagine trying to walk on stormy seas. The waves are crashing around you, loud & thunderous. The skies are dark & menacing, seeming to close in around you. The ocean water is seeming to grab at your heels, & you are so tired from the fight that you almost want to let it pull you under. Drowning seems imminent because you feel the fight being drained from your body.

But up ahead, you see the hand of Jesus, stretched out to meet you. You hear His tender voice saying, “I am here. I am with you. I am enough. I will keep you above the waves. Don’t focus on the threats surrounding you—only keep your eyes on me & you will be okay. Troubles will come in this world, but lo, take heart, for I have overcome the world.”

But it sucks.

The pain & strife & struggle & fight… they all suck… big time.

And sometimes you don’t want to fight. You forget that God is a prayer away & that He has strength for you if you but ask. But sometimes you just want the struggle taken away & it just isn’t.

But God is enough.

Don’t let insecurities, stress, struggles, fears, challenges, exhaustion, etc. keep your eyes off Jesus—because He is enough.

Let Him be your strength & keep honoring Him with your life, even when you feel you can’t. Because Satan will do all he can to stifle our opportunities to glorify God in this life, but GOD IS BIGGER.

So, keep your eyes on Him & keep shining His light through the storm.

Loving Through Anger & Strife

Sometimes our own pride gets damaged when someone says an unkind word or is short with us. The bad attitudes of others tend to rub off on us, don’t they?

And sometimes their bad attitude is directed toward us, & all of a sudden, we are left angry, hurt, & upset.

But other times, it’s simply a misunderstanding that can flip a happy situation into a confusing, upsetting spiral of emotions.

In those moments, we feel justified with our, “You apologize first!” mentality. But when both parties feel this way, things get stuck.

This is especially prone to happen when it’s with someone who is typically encouraging you toward Christ, because guess what? Satan hates it & wants to split up your friendship at all costs.

But, GOD IS BIGGER.

Keep those thoughts in mind next time, & love & trust God enough to ask Him to help you love past your hurt, misunderstandings, & anger.

He is big enough!

Ask that friend to pray out loud with you, even if you can’t look at each other while you do it.

You will be surprised of the healing, grace, reconciliation, & growth that God can bring through that painful situation when we entrust it to His wisdom & love.

A Call to Love

So, there you have it. Love when it’s hard. Pray when it’s hard to love. Let God fill in the gaps.

And when the storms of life rage on, keep your eyes pinned to Jesus & let Him guide you through the storm.

Because GOD. IS. ENOUGH.

Shine Hope… Live LOVE—even when it’s hard.

Coming Next Week

Next week, I have a special, unplanned treat for you. I want to talk about the secret to life. I want to share with you the not-so-secret key that fits all of life together.

… So, make sure to check in next week to see what’s in store!

A Note from Michelle:

If you want to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” & “Hope is Found” pages, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I will feature an item that is changing lives. These pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Empress Necklace

This bib necklace is hand embroidered with an adjustable cotton cord.

Artisan Information:

Even though it is curable, patients with leprosy are often rejected by their families and villages. Due to the visible signs that label them as “lepers”, they usually end up as beggars on the street, often with their children at their sides. This group has changed this lonely lifestyle for these women. They have found a place of life, love, and dignity where they can take pride and gain confidence in their beautiful work.

Purchase this piece and empower a woman in India!

(*Also Pictured: Stella Earrings from India & Royalty Wrap from Thailand.*)

Shop Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE, Lovely!