Pivotal, Life-Changing Moments

Everybody has those moments… You know, the ones that seem to happen unexpectedly, when something about you or your life changes drastically, changing you forever in the process.

They seem to take your life, yell, “Pivot!!” (as only Ross from the show Friends can), & then make it change course from there on out.

I have had maybe ten or so of these life-changing moments that seem like they happened only yesterday because their memories are so vivid.

The First Pivot

So, let’s start with the simplest & earliest one of mine & take a journey through these pivotal moments in my life… a sort of autobiography if you will, except, instead of highlighting my life, we are showing a highlight reel of God’s work in my life.

The first one was the day that I met Jesus.

My Childhood At Church

I was fortunate to grow up in a Christian home. I knew it was important to pray & read my Bible & learn about God. I grew up going to Sunday School before the service & memorizing Bible verses in exchange for pieces of chocolate.

I wasn’t sure what it all meant or the difference between telling stories & which of the stories were actually true retellings in Scripture, because it just seemed like story-time to me at that young age… but something about it just felt right.

The Doubts Came Later…

As a child, I had a pure, simplistic faith in God. I didn’t have doubts to question it, I just accepted it as is, & knew deep-down that something about it just felt true.

Now, as I would grow older, the doubts would arise, seemingly unshakable, causing me to question everything I once believed with ease, unwilling to believe something merely because I was taught to believe it.

But, spoil alert, those doubts that seemed to haunt my every step, unwilling to waver or vanish, were demolished once and for all & my relationship with the grace of Jesus became personal & unshakable… but that’s a Pivot moment for another blog post.

Childlike Faith

As a child, though, my faith was sure. It was pure & trusting. Something in me just connected with it & accepted it without hesitation.

Like a child reaching up & taking the hand of an adult, I trusted that God was real.

I didn’t understand all the ins & outs. I didn’t know much about God. But something in me FELT Him there with me, holding my hand through life… & that was enough for me then.

The Simple, Life-Changing Gospel of God’s Grace

I still remember that day like it was yesterday (except I was much shorter & cuter back then), when I went & asked my parents how I could “ask Jesus into my heart”—the terminology that was used with us as kids.

In essence, all it meant was accepting that God was in charge & I was not… That me choosing to do things my way instead of His was wrong, foolish, & sinful… That I could never bridge the gap between my imperfections & sin to His perfection & grace because I was soiled by sin… But that Jesus came to pay my debt on the cross… That He overcame death & sin by rising from the grave… & that my trust in His salvation for me could cleanse me in the presence of God Almighty.

Accepting the gift of Jesus’ sacrifice on my behalf made me right with God. Not my works, but His.

My Understanding as a Child

And as a little child, around five or six, maybe, that made sense to me.

I knew I had acted selfishly sometimes by wanting toys for myself. I knew I talked back to my parents sometimes. I knew that I had messed up & that I didn’t deserve God.

But I also knew that Jesus had changed that for me… & I wanted to lean into that hope.

The Big Moment… The Pivot

And one night, on the couch in our living room of the house I grew up in… that prayer, led by my Mom, of asking forgiveness for my wrongs & helping me to follow Jesus instead of my way… & to trust Jesus’ gift of grace… is how I became a Christian.

It’s really as simple as that.

It’s not anything we can earn or purchase. It’s literally a free gift to anyone who can accept their need of it. It’s not fancy, specific scripts or recitations.

It’s just a simple, honest prayer, asking for God’s grace to cover your sins & trusting Him over yourself.

God’s Work in Me

No fireworks shot off… there was no fanfare… but it was Pivotal like nothing else.

God’s grace, through Jesus, is not something we have to “clean up for” first. It’s not something we have to prove we deserve. It’s not ever something we have to or can be “good enough” for.

It is simply an invitation to take us as we are, shameful history & all, & to change us from the inside out AS we lean into God for His work in us, AFTER we accept our need for His grace to save us.

His work, not ours.

Anything I do from here on is simply my way of expressing my gratitude & TRUST in the ways of the One Who saved me!

That’s the simplicity of the Gospel.

Forever Changed… In a Moment & Continually

The day that I accepted Jesus as Lord of my life, I was forever changed.

It happens all at once & over time.

I am immediately changed because Jesus’ sacrifice saves me once & for all from the threat of my deserved punishment of eternity in Hell.

And I am changed over time as I learn to bow my human nature to His will. He grows me, He shapes me. He takes the broken parts & makes them beautiful. He takes my temptations & teaches me to lean into Him for strength. He takes my weaknesses & uses them to show Himself capable. He takes my broken heart, mends it, heals it, & He pours His love into the empty crevices of my soul.

The Greatest Adventure Imaginable

He is my everything.

Am I perfect? Heck NO!

But I am now relying on the perfect God in my imperfections.

It’s the grandest adventure I ever imagined.

Learning to Know & Love God More

I once, in my early teen years, through the doubt storm, thought that God was all about rules & dictatorship… But as I grow, I see God as the most patient, loving Father & Friend who walks alongside me, strengthens me, guides me, & grows me into the woman He created me to be.

He heals my heart breaks.

He guides me through the storms of life.

He gives me sure foundation & peace when life flips upside down.

He bolsters me with His strength when mine fails.

He gives me wisdom when I feel lost.

He loves me when I feel unlovable.

He never forsakes me.

He always is quick to forgive me, patient through all of my failures.

He is grace & love & freedom & joy & strength & HOPE.

My Inadequacy Is Eclipsed by His Grace

And all the while, I am reminded how much my actions & inactions prove how much I do not deserve His grace, & yet that is the whole definition of grace, wrapped up in the idea that it is completely undeserved.

I am humbled constantly.

I feel foolish & stupid more often than I would like to admit as I try to live out this life on my own, fail miserably, only to be met with His patient smile, outstretched arms, & His wisdom & strength to get it right the next go around.

Not Perfect, But Trusting in the One Who Is

Christianity doesn’t make me perfect… It makes me redeemed in the sight of the One Who IS perfect.

And so begins my journey of big “Pivot!” type moments.

It all started with a simple trust, a simple faith in the grace of God.

It all started with the simple prayer of a child with childlike faith.

And that is where our journey begins.

Reflection… And an Invitation

Have you taken His outstretched hand yourself or are you holding out?

If Satan has tricked you into a pool of endless doubts & shame & rebellious resistance, but maybe you feel that soft, gentle whisper on your soul to come home, then start by asking God to clear your heart & mind to see Him for Who He really is, & not what the world has painted Him to be.

Ask Him to clear out your doubts & to reveal only the Truth.

Ask Him to guide you home so that your adventure can begin, too.

God is asking you to “Pivot!!” but in a much sweeter way & for a much grander purpose & with much more potential than you could ever imagine.

Will you listen?

I did, & it was the best decision I ever made, that led to the best adventure imaginable… as I live, grow, fail, & see Him along the way, loving me & growing me all along the way.

Coming Next Week

Join me next Monday morning EST for my next big Pivot moment.

God works in our lives in countless little & big moments, but I am especially excited to share the highlight reel of God’s work throughout my life, because every great change has been a result of His guiding me to grow. Grow with me!

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Restoring Hope Necklace

This versatile necklace features mother of pearl in hues of black on one side and off-white on the other, hanging from an antiqued brass chain.

Artisan Information:

In Asia, poverty leads many women to be sexually exploited in brothels. These women want to provide for their families but have so few options. But through your purchase, women are being rescued from these brothels & rehabilitated. Holistic care is given to these women, including a shelter, job training, healthcare, counseling, & educational grants for themselves & their children. You can help these women experience restoration for their future!

Purchase this piece & empower a woman in Asia!

(*Also Pictured: Northern Lights Studs, made in India!)

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!

Ducking underneath the low hanging vines, she stepped through the dark woods. Her senses were alert, taking in the sounds around her. Above her, the deep green leaves rustled in the wind. Around her were the sounds of the forest, the bustling of the scurrying critters, aware & nervous of her presence.

And behind her, she heard a branch crunched underfoot.

It wouldn’t be long now before she was caught, but she was determined to venture further into the mysterious darkness surrounding her.

Sunlight snuck through between branches, dancing on the dark stumps, soft moss, & green grass of the forest floor around her. The darkness seemed to dodge each sunbeam, but the light persisted, shining brightly through the shadows.

Another branch crunched behind her.

She edged forward, taking in the smells of the woods. The fresh air was intoxicating as she breathed deeply, relishing in the fresh scent of nature.

She reached out her arms as she strolled, allowing her fingertips to brush gently against the leaves & floral plants along her self-made path.

She could feel the soft earth beneath the thin soles of her sandals.

Everything seemed right to her, & yet, something was not quite right.

Something was off about this place. As much as she tried to embrace this dark forest of a home, she felt that she never belonged here–that she was never meant to be here.

Something always lurked in the shadows.

She was getting closer now, she could feel it. The air seemed fresher & the beauty surrounding her seemed to grow richer the closer she came.

Very soon now, she would arrive at her determined destination. She would finally be free of the darkness that followed her every step.

Another crunch behind her.

“You can’t run forever,” a deep voice spoke up from the dark.

“I can’t stay here forever either,” she whispered in return, unsure of whether she was even heard.

Undeterred, she continued to step forward, bold in her determination to finally break into the light.

She had grown so accustomed to the dark woods. As foreboding & dim as it was, it was all she ever knew.

Every rock & stump & creek & shadow were all familiar to her. It was her home.

But she also knew that it was a lie. It was something she settled for, not wanting to risk believing the tales of the bright place beyond her dark home.

Why give up everything she has ever known for a tale of something that could be merely a myth? Because somehow this “myth” seemed to beckon to her, calling her by name, lovingly inviting her to see for herself.

She couldn’t see it, but she could feel it. It was more real than anything she had ever physically seen or felt in her dark woods.

But her doubts kept her back for so long, asking her why she would risk trusting in something that she could not see for herself?

Despite her trepidation, she had realized that her thirst for something more than this dark forest beckoned her beyond her ability to deter or ignore it.

She wanted to believe there was more. She wanted to believe that there was something greater than this darkness she had come to accept.

 “It’s not worth it. You won’t be free anymore. Come back with me.” The deep voice stirred up doubts in her heart. She hesitated, halted in the midst of the forest life around her.

“I can’t,” she determined. “I can’t be content to stay trapped here. Something is missing & I want to know what it is. I want more.”

“You will regret it. There are rules. Here, you are free. Come back with me….” As she glanced back, a hand reached from the shadows & eyes gleamed in the darkness.

Something menacing crept through the calm look in those gleaming eyes.

“I… I won’t. Those rules others spoke of… they seem to be right somehow. And I am not free here. It is darkness. It is suffocating. Something is missing. I must know what it is.” She stammered, but as she spoke, courage seemed to bubble up within her, emboldening her to keep forward.

“I have to know the truth,” she determined, turning away from the voice.

A mingling of fear mixed with her newfound courage. Those gleaming eyes she had once accepted now left her feeling unsettled. Something about them sent chills up her spine. She wanted to get away from them.

Stepping more quickly, she decided that nothing would hold her back anymore. She wanted to see the light shine freely. She wanted to feel safe & secure. She wanted freedom from the darkness that encapsulated her life.

She didn’t know if she was somehow too late. She didn’t know if she would be counted worthy to leave the darkness & enter into the light, but she had to at least try.

This place she had come to love & accept seemed but a shadow of what called to her heart. She had to know & see it for herself.

The calm, deep voice seemed to morph in the shadows, an underlying threat seeming to cut into the words, “Come back now. You won’t like it there. It’s better here. Don’t hope for more. What more could you want than doing whatever it is you wish? This is the place you need to be. Stay here!”

Chills danced nervously on her skin as she pushed forward. She no longer had the nerve to look behind her. The voice had always seemed to placate her into never seeking out something better. But now, it seemed to threaten her, demanding that she not break free.

She broke into a run & then she stopped in her tracks when she saw it… Light breaking through the trees & a gentle looking man, made all of light, with arms outstretched & a wide, warm smile welcoming her approach.

All at once, something inside of her changed. She felt securely loved & cherished & protected & cared for & brave & strong & free & FORGIVEN.

Looking into His eyes broke chains that had been clinging to her-chains she had denied were even there. Fear & regret & shame seemed to melt into the ground beneath her with every step closer.

She no longer doubted.

The voice behind her sounded desperate now. “No! Stay here! It’s better here! You can do whatever you want! There are no rules! Don’t go there! I WANT CONTROL OF YOU!”

She broke into a sprint, straight toward this man she had never met & yet felt like someone she had known all her life.

He saw through her, every crack & every mistake. She could feel it. He KNEW her, even her worst!

And yet… warmth. Love… Grace.

As she reached Him, she fell to her knees, tears streaming down her dirtied cheeks, too overwhelmed by emotion to meet His eyes.

She was too unworthy. She wasn’t enough. She didn’t deserve this kindness.

And yet…

“My darling one, do not be afraid. You have been forgiven. My grace has covered you. You are free now.” His voice was sincere, gentle & kind. “Come to me, my daughter. I love you as you are. Welcome home.”

Her face tilted upwards, hesitant & humbled. Her eyes were red & & her cheeks tear-stained.

But something wonderful donned on her in that moment when her eyes met His.

She felt light. She felt… free.

She slowly, carefully rose to her feet, not taking her eyes from the gentle eyes that stared back.

Questions danced in her eyes, wondering if this could all be real… If she could really feel this secure & loved & forgiven & FREE… If she could really be accepted by Someone as kind & gracious & wonderful as He.

With knowing eyes, He nodded in affirmation, understanding her hesitation, & a genuine smile spread across His face, His arms still open wide.

“Welcome home, darling one,” He said as He spread His arms even wider, beckoning her into His welcoming embrace.

This time, she didn’t even pause before closing the distance into the best hug she had ever known… one that seemed to erase in an instant every heartache she had carried throughout her entire lifetime.

She was FINALLY home & she never wanted to go back to the darkness that was once her life.

*****************

After that day, she quickly realized that life still had its complications & she still made mistakes on a regular basis. But something was different now. It was as if she was being changed from the inside out. The more she got to know the Man who welcomed her into light, the more her heart seemed to grow in wisdom, strength, & peace.

She could feel His strength working through her. His courage replaced her fears when faced with difficult circumstances as she learned to trust Him through each storm.

She now could ask Him for wisdom in any situation, no longer relying on the limitations of her own understanding.

And she knew grace as a way of life. His grace seemed to flow through EVERYTHING.

She no longer lived each day trying to survive the dark world she once called home.

He lit her path. He guided her steps. He cared for her & loved her & cherished her soul.

His grace flowed through it all, allowing her freedom she had never known before.

And never came a day where she regretted leaving the darkness of the forest she had once called home because now she knew the stories were true.

The Bright Place was not actually a destination to arrive at, but a Someone to love her unconditionally… A Someone who gave of His own life to cover her wrongs… A Someone who conquered death & sits on the right hand of God’s throne. A Someone more wonderful & powerful & gracious than any she had ever known.

A Someone named Jesus.

And now, instead of living in the darkness… She lived in GRACE.

A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

Also, make sure to “Join My Tribe” by adding your email to the top bar & clicking “Join My Tribe”. This gains you access to an extra weekly dose of encouragement from me in your inbox, along with the link to each week’s new post! I can’t wait to do this journey together!!

Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Holly Necklace

Co-Founder of Trades of Hope, Holly’s, passion is to empower women to be all God created them to be & to live out their potential. Whether she is visiting the brothels of Asia or in hometown USA, her desire is to see women live out their calling with pride & dignity. This piece is a reflection of the pride & skills a woman rescued from the brothels has when given the opportunity. A delicate piece, this golden/pink druzy necklace sparkles in the light.

Artisan Information:

In Asia, poverty leads many women to be sexually exploited in brothels. These women want to provide for their families but have so few options. But through your purchase, women are being rescued from these brothels & rehabilitated. Holistic care is given to these women, including a shelter, job training, healthcare, counseling, & educational grants for themselves & their children. You can help these women experience restoration for their future!

Purchase this piece & empower a woman in Asia!

(*Also Pictured: Lagoon Studs, empowering women out of poverty in India!)

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!