Although I Try…

One of the hardest parts of life, for me, is being aware of my own humanity.

It’s hard to know that I have limits & that I can’t do whatever I want whenever I want however I want.

It’s hard to know I mess up, make mistakes, & don’t always get it right when I am convinced I can handle it.

It’s hard to feel like quitting when you feel the pressure to be so much more than you are.

It’s just hard being human sometimes.

But, I Thought You Had a Handle on All This Because You Run a Blog? Nope

I know that some of you may have been following my blog for the one & a half years I have been doing it & maybe feel that I am such a “stronger Christian” than you are.

I can tell you right now that that is a big NOPE.

I am no stronger or better than anyone else reading this, but I serve a STRONG God who offers His help when we seek Him for it.

I am human. I drop the ball. I have doubts led by my desire to do things my way instead of God’s way. (I think becoming a “strong Christian” only comes when we realize how weak we really are & how much we actually need Him.)

It is ONLY by leaning into God for help in my MANY weak days/moments that I am able to accomplish ANYTHING of any worth. Otherwise, I would toss it all away for a cream soda & some tv show binge-watching or PS4 gaming on the couch.

My Flesh Is Weak… Can You Relate?

I also have a bent toward rebellion, like is so common for many of us, isn’t it?

Fighting my flesh is one of my least favorite parts about my humanity.

As Jesus put it to His disciples, right before He was taken to die on the cross for our sins, “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” (Matthew 26:41)

Isn’t that the truth?

Rebellion Vs. Submission… A Trust Issue

My heart longs to go all in & trust God with every fiber of my being, knowing He loves me more than everyone I know combined (& then a whole lot more!) & yet sometimes, in the quiet moments, I find myself bent toward indignation & obstinance.

Submitting is hard. Trusting is hard. I want my way.

I don’t want to have to trust Anyone else. I don’t want to have to listen to anyone else or do what anyone else tells me to do.

I want to do things MY way, however flawed that way may be… regardless of the fact that it may hurt myself or others (because that is precisely what sin does—it causes harm to self & others).

Taking Every Thought Captive… Not Letting Stray Thoughts Rule Your Heart

I am prone to pride & selfishness… Self-protection.

I have to sometimes constantly do exactly what the Bible tells us when it says, “We demolish arguments & every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, & we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ,”(2 Corinthians 10:5) because I know deep down that He really does know far better than me & that every single time I have gone out in trusting Him, it has proved to be absolutely worth it every single time.

And yet I still resist sometimes.

We Are Freed from the Consequences of Sin, But Not the Temptation of It

Becoming a Christian doesn’t mean we will no longer struggle against our humanity, it means we are saved from being a slave to it. It means we are freed from the consequences of it.

I heard it said best, by author Courtney Doctor, when she said something like, “before we become Christian, we are not able to not sin, but once we let Christ take our sin on Himself by trusting in Him for our salvation, we are now able to not sin.”

In other words, I now have God’s help in not submitting to the temptations that fight for my attention. Will I always turn to Him for that help? Unlikely. I will make mistakes… But God is willing to help me when I ask Him for it.

The Hope in Our Humanity

That is the hope in all of this… in our humanity & the war raging for our attention… when we have submitted ourselves to Him as our Redeemer & when we lean into Him for help, “taking every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ,” He helps us overcome.

Praying for “Backup”

Will we resist in pride sometimes, yes. But this is what I pray in those moments:

“God, I don’t want to listen to You right now. I want to do this my way. I know you are nudging a warning in my mind that this is the wrong path, but it’s MY path & I want to take it. Please help me fight the war in my heart right now. I am too weak to fight back because I feel like I want it so badly. Please help me! Help me want Your way. Help me to see that You are King & Almighty God & my Creator & Redeemer & ONLY You know what is truly best. Help me to trust You. I want Your way because I know it is best but I am feeling so stubborn right now & I don’t want to care about what is best, only what I want. Please help me change my heart to follow You only. Amen.”

God Offers His Help to Overcome

Don’t let Satan convince you that because you feel stubborn or because you mess up that God doesn’t love you… FAR FROM IT!! And don’t let him convince you that it’s all up to you & self-willpower, because it isn’t.

Instead, tell Satan to “talk to the hand” (as once was actually cool to say), & then turn to prayer for God’s grace, forgiveness, & help. God will never neglect to offer you all of those things.

It’s okay to be human… it’s what you were created to be. You were created to need God’s help. You weren’t created to be God… God already has that role covered better than we could ever hope to pull off.

So, submit to Him in your humanity & ask for His help, His wisdom, His courage, His peace, & His strength.

You already have full access to His love, His mercy, His grace, & His care.

1 Peter 5:7 says it right here: “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

Shine HOPE by accepting His help through your own humanity, because He cares for you.

((*And yes, I forgot completely about our Special Feature Post this month the day after Christmas! Oops. Further proof that I am imperfect. I hope you can forgive me as we get back on track after the holidays!))

Coming Next Week

Join me every Monday morning, EST, for more encouragement.

As God grows me, may it encourage you to seek Him & know Him & love Him more every day.

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A Note from Michelle:

If you would like to hear more of my story, check out the “About Me” page. And if you would like to hear how I found my lasting source of HOPE, read the “Hope Is Found” page, on this site. I hope they are an encouragement to you! <3

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Weekly Special Spotlight:

Each week, I feature an item that is changing lives for women around the world. These hand-crafted pieces are offering job creation opportunities for women artisans in impoverished nations all around the world! Check out this week’s featured beauty!!

Wisdom Necklace

Intricately handcrafted petals carved from ethically collected bone set in golden frames.

Artisan Information:

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Purchase this piece & empower a woman in India!

SHOP Here, OR, Email me at michelle@michellehydeonline.com with any questions, & I will message you personally with more information!! Thank you for inspiring HOPE around the world, Lovely!