A Hard Message for All of Us
“I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
Do not stir up nor awaken love
Until it pleases.” (Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4)
This message isn’t just for us women, but it is for all of us.
We are urged, in these verses (in God’s Word), not to stir up or awaken love (desire) when it is out of place… aka outside of a marriage relationship.
But this call to not stir up desire is not an easy one in our media-saturated culture.
The “Sex Sells” Obstacle
A quick observation tells us that in marketing, “sex sells.”
Almost every television show & movie & video game seems to strive after being sexually appealing. Whether it’s merely implied, showcased in crude jokes or comments, shown glimpses of, or just flat out displays sex… sex appeal seems to be pushed everywhere in media.
It’s even a minefield in books, not just in the romance novels so sought out by many women, but even in mysteries & dramas & comedies, authors seem to always be finding ways to slip in a sex scene.
And then to be confronted with this little verse that is repeated throughout Song of Solomon (also called Song of Songs):
“I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
Do not stir up nor awaken love
Until it pleases.” (Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4)
This can be quite the challenge in our sex sells culture.
Purity Culture Isn’t Enough
Lust started early for me, maybe preteens. Since I grew up in purity culture, I knew not to have sex outside of marriage—more out of fear of condemnation than an understanding that God knows what is best for us & trusting His call with it–but that meant I found other ways to indulge the temptations–with fantasies.
Honestly, I think purity culture is lacking, as displayed in Song of Solomon, where it does not seek to shy away from displaying the pleasure of this topic… but rather with a very important key: context.
“I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
Do not stir up nor awaken love
Until it pleases.” (Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4)
That it is something to look forward to with a spouse—a shared intimate experience with your partner in life rather than something tossed about like a cheap ragdoll, misused & perverted from the intimate joy it’s mean to be as shared with your spouse.
God’s Gift to Us–Within Context
Sex should not be taboo, avoided in Christian conversation. Sex should be celebrated as a gift of God to us, to be shared in the context with which He designed it to be enjoyed.
But a warning of the alternative should be included, as echoed throughout Song of Solomon:
“I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
Do not stir up nor awaken love
Until it pleases.” (Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4)
Because although God heals & restores that which was lost, if we heed this echoed warning, there won’t be as much need for healing & restoration.
Not Even a HINT–RUN from It
“But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.” (Ephesians 5:3)
“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18)
God tells us to run from temptation & to avoid even a HINT of it in our lives. He does NOT say, “enjoy a little bit until you can enjoy it more later.”
He says:
“I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
Do not stir up nor awaken love
Until it pleases.” (Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4)
We need to ditch the romance novels, skip the shows & movies that elicit a desire for lustful thoughts, & RUN from temptations in this area, to ensure that we DO NOT STIR UP NOR AWAKEN LOVE until its time–not even a HINT of it.
Avoid Now So You Can Avoid a Need for Healing Later
As someone who loop-holed her way into a pattern of fantasizing (AKA indulging in my form of that HINT OF sexual immorality), I can tell you–even with “JUST” a HINT–fantasizing–healing had to be done & it took YEARS.
God began showing me the damage done as I cried out to Him for help understanding my hurts & my guarded heart & as I surrendered those to Him, He began to heal… but I wasn’t always willing to admit I needed healing because I wanted to justify my sinful patterns, still.
The more we tempt our tendency for temptation by allowing ourselves to be in situations where we are more prone to be tempted, the more we will struggle against & need to fight that temptation… the more we will be tempted to give in to lust & sexual sin.
… & the more we rack up our need for that healing & restoration only God can provide us.
He heals. He restores.
But take time to repent NOW. To avoid NOW. To heal & restore NOW.
It’s NOT Worth It–But It’s SO Easy to Allow Satan to Convince You It Is… That It’s “Harmless”
Don’t tempt it. Don’t go anywhere near those visuals or words that tempt you toward the pit of destruction.
It may not be obvious. You may even convince yourself that the ache you feel, the emptiness you feel, the divide & distance you feel is “just the way life is.”
But it’s not.
It’s not meant to feel that way.
It’s meant to be something rejoiced about. A safe space. A joy.
It’s meant to be done in the context of how God designed it.
He knows you. He knows your heart. He knows its fragility. He sees you try to justify it, while it eats away at you. He knows.
And He doesn’t want that for you. None of it.
Trust His design. Trust Him to know you even better than you do.
Trust Him to know what will bring you joy & peace & fulfillment better than what you think you know.
What Does It Mean to “Not Awaken Love Until Its Time”?
Remember—He is God… ALMIGHTY, All-Knowing GOD.
Trust His design & “I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
Do not stir up nor awaken love
Until it pleases.” (Song of Solomon 2:7, 3:5, 8:4)
So, what does it mean to not awaken love until it pleases? …Until its time? It means avoiding those HINTS of sex outside of marriage, FLEEING from them even… waiting SOLELY for the context with which God designed it to flourish & bring joy–marriage.
Shine HOPE by determining to trust God on this, repent if you haven’t or don’t want to, & ask for His help with awareness of your compromise, help running from the compromise, help with a willingness to accept His help in the compromise… & help with healing & restoration for the mistakes you have already made.
He knows best. He IS enough. EVERY TIME. And God is quick to forgive.
Coming Next Week
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